The Love of a Priestess
by FairyMage
Summary: (Please R&R) I waited for five thousand years to remember who I was... to seek out my Destiny... to meet my Fate and right the wrongs of the past. This is my story.
1. Prologue: Five Thousand Years

Five thousand years is a long time to wait.

I've had five thousand years to watch the rise and fall of civilizations, the crowning of kings and the hanging of queens, the praising of gods and the slaying of their priests.

Yes, five thousand years is a long time.

I remember only bits and pieces of it now. My memory has grown vague and fuzzy. They tell me it is because I no longer need to remember. My purpose is known, my death foretold. Five thousand years of waiting, gone, wasted. Just like that.

I've have asked that they do not tell me. I wish to discover it myself.

After all, I've waited five thousand years to find it.

I grew up in many places, always wandering, always seeking the others of my kind. I never had parents; I cannot even remember if I had them in the beginning.

Perhaps I am just a creation of the Crown, a physical shell used to carry out its work. Eternally trapped in an 18 year old body. Never born, never truly alive, but always meant to be destroyed.


	2. The Pharaoh

I didn't find what I was looking for until recently, on the first of my days at Domino High School. I could sense their presence at the edge of my mind, power that was at once comforting and terrifying.

Comforting, because I had found them, I wasn't alone anymore, and my life would finally have meaning. Terrifying, not because purpose heralded death, but because I could sense that those who controlled the power knew nothing of it or how to control it.

I did not find them. Wandering from class to class all day, I never ran into them directly. When the final bell rang I slumped in my seat, discouraged.

But I had waited so long. Another few days would make no difference.

After school, as I shuffled "home," I came across a quaint game store. Small, tucked away, yet bustling with students. As I stood before the door, the feeling grew stronger. One of them was here. I had to know.

I stepped through the doorway.

Yugi.

His name was Yugi. And he possessed the Puzzle—the infinite power of the Pharaoh. No wonder I had felt his presence so strongly.

I needed to know who he was. What he knew of the ancient scriptures, the events of five thousand years ago. I knew nothing. They knew nothing. Only a few stone tablets they had unearthed. That was all any of us knew.

Later that night I sat on my bed. I could hear the movements downstairs, but ignored them, clearing my mind for the Channeling. It was a skill granted to me by the Crown. My breathing steadied, and I slowly began the ancient chanting. The meaning of the words I have forgotten.

As I opened our minds to each other, I was caught off-guard by the walls around his mind. They were not walls against intruders like myself, for the Pharaoh had enough power to know I was there—and enough to stop me if he chose. No, they were walls built by time, walls that blocked even the Pharaoh from his own memories. I didn't understand. How could the Pharaoh not even know?

The walls formed a giant maze, a puzzle as strange and complicated as the one housing his power. I wandered through it aimlessly, searching for a clue of any kind. I stopped short before a door. As I stepped towards it, he materialized before me.

"I should warn you now," he said, "that my mind is complicated and dangerous. I myself do not know what lies behind these doors. For all any of us know, it is empty, a crumbling floor waiting to drop you into infinite darkness." He was tall and handsome, with the aura that comes with royalty and power.

"I have little fear of that. I am here to open them and discover what I can. Our destinies are bound. I must know how," I replied smoothly. "I think I can tell which doors are real and which are false."

He gazed down at me, staring straight into my dark eyes. Finally, he nodded. "I see. I am dealing with power here that I do not understand. You may call me Yami. I see that there are doors here that only you can find, that only you may open. That which is behind them is not meant for me to see."

And with that, he turned and disappeared into the darkness.


	3. The Memory

I pressed my fingers against the door and pushed it open.

_A young woman was running… Running through pouring rain and loud thunder. Mud stuck to her feet, dragging her down. She kicked off her sandals and continued running, clutching her soaked cloak to her shoulders. Ran along a river, past villages, ran until she was ready to collapse from exhaustion. Her lungs strained and her legs ached but she could not stop… fear drove her harder and farther. When she approached the great gates to the city she didn't stop, even when the guards ordered her to. She was a priestess, they would understand. She had to find the Pharaoh, and now. She ran up the long road to his palace, through the palace, skidding to a stop before his private chambers. She knew…_

_I knew he would be in there. He was always there at this time. But now I was here for a different reason. I drew the heavy curtain aside and fell into the room, collapsing at his feet._

"_What is it? Why have you run here? Did you not meet the chair I sent to fetch you, my little bird?" he murmured softly, stroking my hair and wrapping me in his arms._

"_No. No," I managed to gasp out. "You must… help… now…" I choked on my own message. Tears came to my eyes._

"_Why?" he asked, suddenly concerned. He tilted my chin up to look into my eyes. "What's happened at the Temple?"_

My body felt weak as I broke the Channeling. Never before had I been able to fuse my mind with the mind of a memory. I had become the young woman of the Pharaoh's—Yami's—memory. I did not know how, or why.

But I was beginning to assemble the little pieces of the past that I needed to know my destiny.

She came in from downstairs and sat beside me on my bed. "You've been Channeling," she commented. "Did you find anything?"

"Yes. But I'm not sure if I want to know how the memory ends," I whispered.

"The memories of the time you seek will frighten you, I have no doubt. It was a dark time for everyone. Even with the limited knowledge we have we know that much. We have been working on finding the others. There are at least two more nearby, maybe even more. You have found the Pharaoh. Worry about those memories now. They are the most telling."

I nodded silently. She stood, brushed my hair away from my forehead, and sighed. "I, too, am frightened. Your Crown knows more than it will tell," she murmured, brushing the gold surface lightly. "And Destiny is a frightful power to fight."


	4. Dueling

Days passed before I dared Channel again. Yugi introduced me to his friends at school: Joey, Tea, Tristan. I couldn't remember ever having friends. They went out often, to movies and shopping (at Tea's request) and lunch. They were close, and drew me in as well. I felt out of place amongst them—time had made me demure and silent. I had preferred the presence of the ancient Pharaoh to his young physical counterpart.

I also met his other friends—Mai and Duke—while out at lunch with them. They, too, unnerved me. I was used to quiet and solitude, unused to being asked questions and associated with.

One day, I discovered a memory without having to Channel. Yugi and his friends were eating lunch together at a restaurant when Mai challenged Tea to a "friendly duel." Tea declined at first, pushing Joey to play in her place. Joey refused, and her friends urged Tea to at least try. Curious, I leaned over and asked Yugi what they were talking about.

"Duel Monsters," he replied. "Here, watch Mai and Tea play. Tea's just a beginner, Mai's a pro, so you'll get a good feel for the game. It's much more exciting, though, when someone of Joey's skill duels Mai."

I watched, fascinated, as Mai skillfully played Trap and Magic cards to demolish Tea's relatively weak Monsters. Tea, I could easily see, was uncomfortable with the game. For starters, her deck was unbalanced, lacking the supportive and sneaky Magic and Trap cards Mai's deck was loaded with. Second, Tea was indecisive and wary when playing cards. Mai won handily in just a few minutes.

"Let me try," I found myself saying suddenly. I didn't even know how to play the game… and yet I felt certain that I did.

"Yugi, may I see your Deck?" I was sure that Yugi's deck was better equipped than Tea's.

"Here, have a look at mine and Joey's. That should give you a balanced Deck," Yugi handed me the two decks. I appreciated the fact that he did not try to stop me, only help me in my attempt. Joey, on the other hand, was not so gracious.

"What?! You're going to let her duel Mai, Yugi?" Joey exclaimed.

"And why not?" I demanded, my face flushing with indignation. Everyone looked startled; it was the first time they'd heard me close to angry.

"I don't know… I know I wouldn't want to get my butt kicked by Mai the first time," he mumbled faintly.

"Don't worry about me. My pride is not the issue here," I countered smoothly. Mai smiled at me approvingly.

"This ought to be good," she said. And we commenced to play.

The game was easier than I had thought. Perhaps the cards were good, or Lady Luck hovered over my shoulder, but the combinations and plays came easily and quickly to my hands. I knew when to play which cards, knew when Mai was bluffing and when to take risks. The thrill of the game was exhilarating.

I saw the weakness in Mai's strategy and promptly exploited it. By the time I played my final card, defeat was imminent. I drew a card, sacrificed my Monster on the field, and summoned the Dark Magician Girl. In one quick turn, I won, it seems, as easily as Mai had won against Tea.

I had been unaware of my surroundings during the duel, completely engrossed in the task at hand. As my mind cleared and I looked around, I was met with several amazed stares.

"Are you sure you've never dueled before?" Tristan asked. "'Cause it sure felt like you have."

"You played everything perfectly. It was nearly flawless," Duke said in awe.

Joey and Mai could only gaze and each other, equally confused. Yugi was looking at me with his large purple eyes. He wasn't confused or angry or even awestruck; it was more a curious stare, as if he were trying to unlock the doors behind my eyes.

"I'm certain I've never played before. I think I just got lucky. I watched Tea play, and I had good—better cards than she did. I learn quickly," I stammered faintly. _How could I have played so skillfully, when I was fairly certain I'd never held a Duel Monsters card before!_


	5. The Dark Magicians

I handed Yugi and Joey their respective Decks back, then leaned against the booth. The rhythmic chatter lulled me nearly to sleep. But my heightened powers would not allow simple sleep. I could tell I was connecting to a memory as I sat there. I hadn't even tried to Channel.

The young woman stood opposite a young man in a dark room. It was a temple, of sorts, for a rough sandstone altar stood before them. Silently, the young man stretched out his hand and one of the great stone panels behind him moved. It turned, revolving so that one of its great flat faces faced me; it was carved with a huge image of a monster. He withdrew his hand, and I mimicked his motions. My outstretched hand exposed a stone carving behind me that I could not see. But I knew what it was. Without a second thought I cried, "Go! Dark Magician Girl, destroy his monster!"

I had learned long ago not to think too hard about my collected memories. Doing so only confused me. Five thousand years allowed me to develop unbelievable patience. I could wait until enough memories had been gathered to make clear the course of the future.

And the fusion was easier this time. It had flowed naturally from "the young woman" to "myself" without a break.

I opened myself to Channeling that night. I contemplated entering another's mind, but decided to expend my energy on something at least useful. I was frightened of the Pharaoh's memories, but thankful that eventually they would point me to my Destiny.

I wandered through Yami's mind, searching for a new door. After some time, we crossed paths. He, too, must have been awake and searching. I wondered what it was he sought.

"You may be interested in something," he said slowly.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Follow me." He began to walk deliberately through the darkness. I followed obediently. "You finished the duel with Dark Magician Girl today. I was impressed. She is a powerful card in her own right, though I myself prefer her male companion, the Dark Magician. But that is not what I wanted to discuss with you. Here," he motioned to a door on his right.

Wordlessly, I nodded thanks and pushed open the door. Nothing happened, no memory poured out. Yami had followed me in, closing the door behind him.

"This is a conscious memory that I trigger. I'll watch it with you. Perhaps you can explain that which I cannot."


	6. The Ancient Memory

The Pharaoh closed his eyes; as he did so, the darkness lightened and dispersed slightly. By the time his eyes had reopened, the darkness was gone and replaced by the memory.

It was, indeed, a strange memory.

_The Pharaoh and a Priest—the High Priest, from his garments—were playing an ancient game of Duel Monsters. They were in a temple like the one I'd seen the young woman in. I could hear, in the background, screams and cries. Without seeing or really hearing, I could sense the blood and violence and disorder that surrounded this duel. Both the High Priest and the Pharaoh had locked themselves away from the rest of the world, leaving it in chaos. They were completely focused on their duel. One at a time, they each summoned forth their monsters. I watched the High Priest call upon the Blue Eyes, White Dragon, and the Pharaoh summon his professed favorite, the Dark Magician. They stood opposite each other, man and Monster together, the fate of the world resting on their shoulders._

I blinked and shook my head to clear away the memory. The Pharaoh stood nearby, closer than I had thought. He reached out and put a firm hand on my shoulder, as if to steady himself.

"Can you tell me what it means?" he asked breathlessly. Conjuring the memory for me to see must have taken some effort, I realized.

I shook my head. "I know only bits and pieces. This is only the second memory I have extracted from you. When I gather enough memories for the course of Time to become clear, I will tell you," I promised. "Please, try not to exert yourself any more on my behalf. If I am meant to see the memory, I will."

"Very well," he nodded. "I understand some, but not all. I know that was an ancient version of Duel Monsters, and I know we were playing a dangerous game—a game in which the loser lost everything and was sent to the Shadow Realm. I know that I was playing the High Priest, and that he looks very much like a… friend of Yugi's."

"You seem reluctant to refer to him as a friend. Who is he?"

"His name is Seto Kaiba. He is… not like the others. He is cold and aloof, surrounded by money and power. I don't understand Kaiba. I cannot read him. But I know it must be very lonely, with no friends and not the faith to gain any."

I wished to meet this Seto Kaiba. Surely he, too, would have memories like the Pharaoh, if he were indeed the one in the memory.

I wondered what item he could possess. I knew the location of four of the seven. It seemed I had stumbled upon the fifth.

As I lay on my bed, waiting for sleep to finally claim me, I remembered the presence of the Pharaoh, and the way he had laid his hand on my shoulder. It was a pleasant feeling.


	7. Seto Kaiba

The next morning I looked up Seto Kaiba in the phone book. There was only one listing: Kaiba Corp. No wonder the Pharaoh mentioned Kaiba's power. He was CEO of one of the most powerful companies in the world.

I fiddled with the phone cord as I rang his offices. When the secretary picked up, I asked to speak with Kaiba himself. As expected, she declined to connect me. When asked if I would like an appointment instead, I jumped at the chance.

It never occurred to me that the secretary did not ask why I wanted an interview, nor who I was or what company I represented. She simply scheduled me in at one o'clock the next day.

She stopped me on my way out the door. "You're going to see Seto Kaiba today." It was a comment, not a question. "You may want to know something."

I paused, uncertain. "What have you done?" They were always planning things behind my back, revealing it only at the last minute, just before I needed to know.

"You are now the sole executive of a very powerful, wealthy company. The company is Millennium Corporation. You came into the position as part of an inheritance from a distant uncle. You have extensive training in business and are perfectly capable of running the company on your own. It may help you to know all this when you speak to Seto Kaiba."

"Why?" I asked suspiciously.

She did not answer. "It may be useful."

With a heavy sigh, I walked out the door. I didn't even want to know why—or how—they had organized such an elaborate scheme.

I strode up to the secretary's desk, looking more confident than I felt.

"I'm here to see Mr. Kaiba," I announced.

She nodded mechanically. "Sit there. He'll call you in just a few moments."

Indeed, just a few moments later I heard a light tenor call out for the next appointment. The secretary looked over her glasses at me and nodded. Quickly, I stalked across the room and opened the door to Seto Kaiba's office.

He motioned for me to sit down in a leather-upholstered chair opposite him. As he flipped through papers on his desk I examined him. He was very tall, and thin, but I could sense that he was well built and muscular beneath his clothes. His dark brown hair was clean cut. If he had been any other man, he would have been very attractive.

But his eyes… his dark, beautiful, frightening, icy blue eyes…

Seto Kaiba finally looked up at me and into my eyes. He was trying to stare me down. I was tempted to avert my gaze, but instead I stared firmly into his eyes. I would not let that icy blueness scare me.

"So, I'm sure you realize that I don't grant personal appointments to every beautiful woman who calls me and asks for one." I declined to respond. "I looked you up, and I discovered that you are the sole executive of Millennium Corp. Now, Kaiba Corp, is always seeking to expand our market, products, and assets. Millennium Corp. is a small corporation, but you have exceptional assets and financial stability. It would make an excellent addition to Kaiba Corp."

"Are you asking me to respond to that? What do you want?"

"I propose the joining of our two corporations. Naturally, Kaiba Corp. would assume all your assets and stocks. You would be allowed to retain some control over your company's doings, but I would be in ultimate control. You would be paid handsomely to be my employee."

His arrogance annoyed me, but I tried to keep myself under control.

"Mr. Kaiba, I am only here to attempt to determine terms of our companies merging. I would request several terms that you have either disregarded or overlooked. I want to maintain complete control over my company. I would also like Millennium Corp. to retain some form of independence from Kaiba Corp. Among others, of course."

He gazed at me, unperturbed. After long minutes of deadlock, he spoke. "Very well. There will be other times to discuss this. I'm scheduling you for an appointment in two days, same time. I expect to see you back here."

I almost glared at him. I never wanted to step back in his office if my life depended on it. But I had no choice. I could think of no other way to determine which item he possessed, and what memories I could unlock.


	8. Fighting Destiny

The days passed quickly. They spoke in hushed terms, sneaking around me. I assumed they discovered my displeasure at being set up for my meeting with Seto Kaiba. They said nothing to me over the next days, not even asking about my Channeled memories.

Two days later I found myself back in Seto Kaiba's office, waiting to be admitted to his office. I couldn't imagine anyone truly _wanting_ to be in my position.

I would find out later that there were many young women dying to be in my shoes.

As soon as I was called in, I sensed there was something different about this meeting. This was only partially a business meeting. He still wanted to acquire my non-existent company, but he seemed ready to take a different tack.

His new angle shocked me into silence.

"Glad to see you could make it. I think that this agreement will work out much better."

I sat across from him again, eyes narrowed. I was highly suspicious of his newfound pleasantries.

"I was speaking to your—guardians, I suppose you would term them. They've informed me that while you are indeed old enough to make your own decisions and run your own company, they have made certain provisions for you. The agreements have all been worked out."

"What?" I asked coldly. "You're taking my company away from me?" It wasn't the company itself, it was the fact that it was the only connection I had to Seto Kaiba, my only form of leverage. But why would they have done that, effectively ruining all their careful planning?

"All the agreements have been worked out and most of the arrangements will be made shortly," he continued, ignoring me. "I'm sure you will have few objections to signing this. In fact," he added as he pushed a slip of paper across the table to me, "it doesn't matter if you do or not. You are not in a position to refuse."

I picked up the paper and read. I froze. I couldn't read past the first line.

"A _marriage contract_?" I managed to squeak.

He smirked at me. On any other man, it would be sexy. "Yes, my dear. Everything has been worked out. Now, I have other business to attend to."

"Marriage?" I managed to gasp out. "You would resort to _marrying_ me in order to get my company?"

He looked up at me. There was no smart smirk on his face, no ambition in his eyes. There was something else, something that I could not place. "It is much more than simply attaining your company. I get what I want, make no mistake. And your company is not the only thing to be acquired in this deal." He turned away, back to the endless stacks of paper on his desk. He refused to look at me.

With a sharp intake of my breath, I turned and stormed out of the office.

"I can't believe you!" I shrieked at her as I barreled into the house. "_You_ planned this! And behind my back!"

"It was the best thing we could do. It will be the most beneficial."

"For whom? You? Me? This is not the way I wanted it!"

"Want is not an option."

"I know, I know! Destiny! I've spent five thousand years looking for my destiny! I refuse to believe this is it!"

"Believe what you'd like. You will marry Seto Kaiba."

"That, _that_ is where you're wrong. I won't. I won't marry him. Five thousand years of bowing meekly to Fate and Destiny and the Gods. Let me seek them on my own! Let me find my Destiny on my own terms. And let me shape it myself!"

I spent the night sobbing silently to myself. I thought several times of the ways to escape from my engagement, to run away and never worry about my fate. I would wait another five thousand years if necessary. Or I would stop waiting at all.

For surely I had been reserved to power to take my own life.

But I could not. Every plan, every plot, every escape was fruitless. My anger had faded, and I was left facing stark reality: I could not run away. Fate would catch up with me no matter where I went or what I did.

She was right. I would marry Seto Kaiba.

I was too afraid not to.


	9. Lost

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Gomen gomen!!! I don't know how to do those little line break thingies… If someone could please tell me how to do those??? I really need to add them to my chapters… I switch ideas and people and it gets confusing without my little breaks!

Oh, and thank you for the nice reviews!!! I will offer feedback on them now…

RobinIV: Thanks! I think some of the future chapters will be a little slower… As I write I pick "good" places to stop (that means I stop when I remember the homework I haven't done… ). Thanks for the comment about characterizations too! I would hope that after watching practically the entire American series I would know something… Kaiba's characterization will change a lot, though… he can be such a jerk in the show. A hot jerk, but nonetheless a jerk that I don't want him to be.

Mistress-of-eternal-Darkness: I love compliments. You're right, everything will come together eventually. Keep waiting! I've got it all planned out… I'm trying to keep things MYSTERIOUS for my readers!!! giggles

Ayame akakaru Kaiba: Thank you! That was really what I was trying to get at… A balance between uncertainty and certainty and a whole number of other things, so thanks for picking up on that! I think it might have been too subtle… Sorry, now that school's starting up again the chapters will be staying pretty short… I'll TRY to update once a day… (let's see how long THAT works…)

Okay, enough yabbering from me. Time to start the story…

Chapter Eight: Lost

Seto Kaiba was not all business, as I had thought. The wedding was planned for nearly a year in advance. There were many other things to attend to; Duel Monsters tournaments and business engagements, namely, on his part. I paid little attention to either. I would monitor Duel Monsters tournaments when I better understood what I was looking for.

But in the time in between Kaiba made some effort to discover the girl he was going to marry.

We went out to lunch often, sometimes dinner, sometimes a show or play or other evening event. I was introduced to his colleagues and their wives and friends. I was well regarded within their circle.

I spent less and less time with Yugi and his friends. I did not tell them about my engagement to Kaiba. I couldn't. They had made their opinions known early. I feared losing their respect for agreeing to such a marriage. It didn't matter that I had no say in the matter.

I missed them. There was a warmth I had not known between them, a comfortable place where I could cease to search for my Destiny and only wait for it to come.

My Channeling had not fallen by the wayside, however. I still needed to know all I could from the Pharaoh, so I continued to Channel with him. We crossed paths quite frequently now. Reflecting back on it, he must have sought me out, because the laws of probability favored us never meeting within the complex walls of his mind.

We talked often, long conversations that really seemed to have nothing to do with me finding my Destiny. I began to enjoy my time with the Pharaoh immensely and looked forward to my nightly Channeling sessions.


	10. Memories Better Left Unseen

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Gomen (again)! The last chapter, I realized, was so lame that I had to keep writing and post another one… Please keep reviewing!

Updates will be pretty slow this weekend, since it's New Year's and I have four college applications due… groan

Happy New Year's everybody!

Chapter 9: Memories Better Left Unseen

As I learned more about Yami and developed our personal relationship, I began to acquire many memories that were probably better left unseen. Then again, they must have been necessary for me to see in order for me to see them. The Crown did not let me intrude entirely into a person's past.

The young woman of his memories, I discovered, was a priestess of a Goddess. I was yet unsure of what Goddess, or what power she served. But she was certainly a priestess. And I was surprised at what I learned about her.

Apparently, as a priestess she was not bound to chastity. There were many brief, fleeting memories in Yami's mind of being with her. At first, they were gentle and innocent. When she visited the city she would be given a special chair beside Yami at dinner, and would spend the whole night talking animatedly to him. There were brief moments where they brushed hands or paused for a quick, secret embrace. Often, he would escort her around the city as she carried out her duties as a Priestess, then take her around the marketplace and pay for her goods.

As time progressed, the memories reflected a more intense, more personal, more passionate relationship. She would go, every night, at his bidding, from the temple to his palace in the city. He would wrap her in his strong arms and stroke her hair, much as he had in the first memory. They would sit together in his vast library, reading scrolls and discussing the state of his kingdom. He would whisper sweetly in her ear, calling her his "little bird." He kissed her softly, gently, on the cheek at first and then later her throat and lips. They would lie comfortably beside each other on the banks of the river, the shade of a tree, or Yami's large bed.

She was very important to understanding Yami's fate. I was certain of that. My first memory and all of these now only made that clearer. Yami loved her more than anything. His eyes glowed with pleasure when she arrived at the palace, filled with longing and pure love. He had rushed to protect her, I felt sure, that night she ran to him in the rain. Perhaps he had even rushed to the Temple, into some kind of danger.

I didn't know. I wasn't completely certain. But I needed to know who she was.

Eventually I gathered the courage to attempt a Channel with Kaiba. I was slightly uncomfortable; I wasn't sure why, but I felt that perhaps he had more to hide than Yami. I should have had free access to his mind, as his fiancée, but I couldn't very well suddenly approve of our engagement.

The first time I tried I discovered he had no item. The items always acted as an automatic key; my Crown let me in easily. Without one, Kaiba could close his mind to me. The ways of the Crown were strange, but I never questioned them. Kaiba would have to trust me before I could Channel with him.

I was disappointed about not having found the fifth item, but I let it go quickly. Kaiba was important nevertheless. It was around him I felt the power I had been seeking, as much as it surrounded Yugi. Even without his chosen item he commanded power. And his memories would surely be no less valuable than Yami's.


	11. Kaiba's Trust

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Hey! Happy New Year's guys! Sorry I couldn't update—had massive family parties and three apps due (not to mention the Bio test I didn't study for… XX)

Anyway, just wanted to respond to my latest reviews:

Ayame akakaru Kaiba (Chapter 9): Don't worry about it, it simply occurred to me that I wait for people to update too, so I should really try to be good about it and do it as often as possible. Then again, I also understand how busy people are (like you, apparently). Congrats on starting your fanfic! Fanfic-ing is fun—I do it when I need to relax and then it just kind of takes over… like right now there's so much homework I should be doing but hey, why do homework when you can write fanfics? Oh, and you'll always feel special after a review. If somebody's going to take the time to review, I'll at least take the time to respond (and it's not like I'm getting millions of reviews or anything). Funny you should mention Ishizu… She definitely wasn't my model for anybody, since she's actually in the story (you'll see her in later chapters) but I guess being priestesses they all kind of act alike??? I'll keep an eye out for your fanfic and try to review!

Same person (Chapter 10): Mmmm… well, the priestess definitely does, that much should be pretty obvious. Don't know about our main character yet, though… I'll try to answer your question without giving too much away. The Crown is what gives her the power to Channel with others (like Yugi and Kaiba, although it didn't quite work out…). Everything else will be revealed in bits and pieces (and one MASSIVE revelation at the end. Yes, I've already written out the end); hope you like suspense! Don't worry about being a suck-up and advertising—you're completely welcome to do it in your reviews.

And now, the actual chapter.

Chapter 10: Kaiba's Trust 

Kaiba wanted to trust me. And he wanted me to trust him. The discovery came to me slowly, in bits and pieces. If I hadn't been so narrow minded, I think perhaps I may have seen it earlier.

After several months together we were sitting beside each other on a park bench, a good eight inches apart. We sat in silence, saying nothing, watching young lovers and children at play go by. I had nearly lost myself to solitude and quiet contemplation when I felt Kaiba slide his arm around my shoulders.

Surprised, I looked over at him. He was still facing straight forward, his eyes deliberately cast away from mine. His hip rested against mine in a quasi-comfortable way—to any passerby, we might have passed for a young couple in love, but I could feel discomfort between us. Gently, he attempted to draw me closer with the arm around my shoulders. I would not allow myself to be drawn in.

Kaiba paused, unsure of how to continue. I knew he was seeking a more personal level to our engagement, one he had been thus far unsuccessful at building. I didn't understand why he suddenly craved my attention and desire. He hadn't bothered when he'd haughtily informed me I was going to marry him.

After a moment's hesitation, he wrapped his other arm around me too, and leaned in towards my face. I sat stoically, intentionally looking away and turning my left cheek and side of my neck to him. I wanted him to know how displeased with this relationship I was. I refused to allow him to become close to me. If he wanted this, fine. I would have nothing to do with it.

Instead, I felt him hesitate again. My coldness had brought him up short. But after another moment, he leaned in and gently kissed my neck. I sat still. He kissed me again, more firmly this time. Then he gently moved up to the line of my jaw, kissing the soft spot behind my ear tentatively. I shivered, whether in pleasure or pain I do not know. At the time, I thought it was pain.

In retrospect, it may have been pleasure.

As I sat still and let Kaiba caress my throat gently, I saw Yugi and his friends approaching out of the corner of my eye. Scared, I reached out to push Kaiba away. But he refused. He easily brushed my hands away and took my face in his hands. I could hear Tristan now, talking about Joey's sister, Serenity. It was no secret that he was madly in love with her. Kaiba quickly turned my head to face him. I looked away.

Quickly, Kaiba brushed his lips against mine in a gentle, tentative kiss. When I didn't scream or force him away, he kissed me harder and longer. At some point during the kiss he forced my lips apart and began running the tip of his tongue gently along my lips.

How long he held me there, trying to tell me something I refused to hear, I do not know.

Perhaps we both felt the eyes watching us; as Kaiba broke away from me I pushed him away with my hands. I looked up slowly, afraid of what I would see.

Yugi and the others were watching us. Slowly, I looked up at each of them, pleading with them to understand. Only Yugi met my gaze with something of sympathy or understanding. Tristan and Tea were shocked, looking away from me. Joey met my eyes with anger. I averted my gaze. I couldn't stand to see their disapproval.

Joey looked ready to say something; Yugi put a hand on his arm, motioning for him to remain silent. I felt the tears pricking at the corner of my eyes. After five thousand years, I had lost the only friends I had ever known because of a marriage I did not want.

"You're better than this," Joey mumbled as they finally turned to leave.

Up until now Kaiba had shed his hesitance and insecurity, lounging beside me comfortably, his arm still around my shoulders. It didn't take long for it to dawn on him that Yugi and the others weren't gawking at the fact that he was out on what appeared to be a date—they were amazed by the fact that it was _me_ with him, and that I was their friend. He smirked upon the realization, gratified in the knowledge that he had something over them now.

At Joey's comment, he stirred angrily, ready to get up and start a fight. I put out my hand and touched his shoulder. He paused, looking at me.

"Please don't," I whispered. "It's bad enough as it is."

I don't know what it was, whether it was the slight tremor in my voice or the tears in my eyes or even a change of heart on Kaiba's part. After a moment's silence he settled back down, not even watching as Joey and the others disappeared along the path.

I knew that he wasn't looking at me either.


	12. The Bonds of Destiny

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Thanks for the new reviews, just wanted to take a minute to respond.

RobinIV: I hope you had fun on your vacation; I imagine it was more important than reviewing my fanfic (sweet Kenshin smile). Yes indeed, and neither did I when I wrote it. Actually, I lie, that was my plan all along. "It will be interesting to see whom she chooses"—glad you mention it! (evil smirk) It's a pretty important part of the plot! Well, most people would enjoy Yami's company more, since up to now Kaiba's been a royal $$. Good luck with your college apps! Mine turned out fine, thanks, I hope yours did too. So stressful! I think they do it to torture us… some kind of cruel conspiracy… I don't know. I know Stanford doesn't start processing until this month… so why it was due in early December is beyond me. I only have two apps left, and they're basically finished! (claps) But then come financial aid stuff… (grumbles) stupid FAFSA…

Mystical V: I won't ask; it was what I intended anyway. I had hoped to get readers by being mysterious (and I have) but I think it's a little TOO mysterious for a large majority of readers who don't get past the summary. Thanks for reading! (It's intriguing, by the way)

Ayame akakaru Kaiba: Hahaha. I guess all I have to say is that the main character is a very complex character. Sometimes she's meek and accepting, while on occasion she's a fighter. The thing about her, too, is that she _doesn't_ believe that Destiny is mutable, necessarily, and that's why she's doing everything. Don't worry; at some point in a much later chapter she _will_ rebel (trust me, I'm the author). Oh, and thank you for agreeing with Joey. I'm trying to make him seem sensitive and protective (not in a romantic way, though).

Sorry for this exceptionally short and boring chapter, but I'm working on school stuff and a new fanfic, which requires a decent amount of historical research. Disgusting, no? Oh, and if you like my fanfic, please encourage other people to read it too! I'll be posting the next (and much longer, relatively speaking) chapter Sunday (hopefully).

Chapter 11: The Bonds of Destiny 

I went home that night and cried myself to sleep. I didn't want to Channel with Yugi. Yami must have found out by now; he would hate me for keeping secrets from him. Even more, he would hate me because it was Kaiba I was marrying; the image of the High Priest threatening to destroy Yami stood clear in my mind.

I was going to marry a man I did not love. I had come to terms with that. All along, I suppose, I knew that if I were ever to marry it would not be for love. Destiny seemed indifferent to human emotions. I had even, I think, managed to accept the fact that I was giving up something of myself, some part of me that I had managed to cultivate for five thousand years that I would now have to share with Kaiba.

But I had not counted on returning to my former vegetable state, where I was to not think or feel or care. I was losing everything, with no way to get it back. Destiny had trapped me again, as it had every time I had sought to escape. Only this time, it meant business. The coincidences of Kaiba and Yugi and the High Priest and the Pharaoh were too obvious to ignore. And finally, I was to fulfill my purpose.

Destiny would kill me, as it had been planning for five thousand years. But it would make sure that I suffered before it released me from its bonds forever.

Months passed. I could hardly keep track of days or weeks. I was fitted for gowns, asked about colors and foods. I don't remember ever answering. This was somebody else's wedding, not mine. The plans for my wedding were stored carefully in my head, special secrets that would go with me to the grave.

With about three months left until the wedding Kaiba asked them for permission to relocate me to his mansion. They agreed. I said nothing. There was nothing left to say.

I packed my meager belongings into a small bag. It had gone unspoken, but I knew that from that moment on I was to be Kaiba's wife. I would not be free to associate with my friends, but only with those Kaiba approved. I would spend my days working for Kaiba Corp., tucked away in an office working figures, instead of enjoying myself in the sunshine. I would disappear from the world, only to reappear at special events when Kaiba needed me. That was my role now. That was who I was. That was my Destiny.

I sat on my bare mattress. Kaiba was not supposed to arrive for me for another few hours. I had time. My chances to see Yugi and my other friends were unlikely now. I needed to speak to them.


	13. Little Bird

The chanting came easily to my dry lips, and soon I had Channeled with Yugi. I opened my eyes, finding myself face to face with Yami. He was not as angry as I had anticipated. Instead, he seemed concerned and a little sad.

"Are you all right?" he asked cautiously. I felt the tears begin to run down my cheeks. I said nothing. Gently, sadly, he came to me and wrapped me in his arms. I cried into his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry," I managed to choke out. "I didn't mean… I didn't want… I don't know…"

"Shhh," he shushed me. "Think no more of it. I do not hold you responsible for this. I know that there are powers far stronger than either of us at work here. I never thought that you would willingly consent to marrying Kaiba out of love." He stroked my hair gently and wiped away my tears.

"I don't understand," I whispered. "I don't know what to do now. Where does my Destiny lead me from here?"

Yami shook his head sadly. "That, my little bird, I cannot tell you…" I didn't hear any more of his words.

"What did you call me?" I asked softly.

"Hmm? Little bird?"

"Why do you say that?"

Yami looked surprised. "I don't know… really… it just seemed… fitting… I'm sorry. Why?"

I shook my head. "Never mind. It is nothing."

"Then there is something I think you may want to see before you go. Downstairs, in the secret rooms, there are stone tablets. You know of them, I am sure. But did you know that stones have memories too? They know things. They keep secrets. Perhaps some of the answers you seek will be there."

There was a slight pause, and Yami attempted to finish. "You are welcome to wander my mind whenever you like." He was careful not to use any terms of endearment now. "I will be awaiting your next Channeling."

I nodded. I would most certainly be back. "Please, if you can… Tell everyone I'm sorry. I never meant for it to end like this."

Yami nodded and gave me a final hug. To my surprise, he then leaned down and gently kissed my forehead. "Be safe," he whispered, and broke the Channel.


	14. The Priest's Priestess & A Pharaoh's

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Thank you for all the new reviews! Not much to reply to, but hopefully this will incur new reviews!

Robin IV: Yes, damn the FAFSA and the CSS profile and everything else.

Oh yes, and if any of you like Rurouni Kenshin, read my new fanfic! I'm not getting any reviews and I'm really sad, since I really like it.

Chapter 13: The Priest's Priestess and A Pharaoh's Love

As Yami suggested I went downstairs to the secret rooms. I stopped before the stone tablet of the High Priest. Curious, and a little afraid, I reached out and touched the smooth, cold stone. At first, I felt nothing. Then I felt a slight tingling, and knew that the tablets held some of the power I needed to Channel.

I opened my mind and attempted to search the stone's. I needn't have tried. The stone seemed eager to relinquish its memories to me.

She stood in a line of young girls, in a large hall. They stood side-by-side, facing the large doors leading into it. They opened, and priests began marching in—two files, which culminated with the High Priest and his advisors at the very rear.

The High Priest was very handsome. The young priestesses began twittering as they saw him, his tall, godlike body standing proudly. He wielded the power of the Rod in his position. His dark blue eyes nearly drove the priestesses insane with desire.

The procession stopped just before the line of priestesses, and the files parted to permit the High Priest to pass through. He stood before them, beautiful and desirable and powerful, and waited silently.

The High Priestess had first to perform her duty. She stood before the young priestesses, prepared to name her successor. But there was never any speaking. She raised her hands, then drew them down to point at a young girl standing some ways away. The girl eagerly stepped forward, standing beside the High Priestess as the next announcement was made.

Now the High Priest stepped forward. All eyes were turned on him. Slowly, he looked up and down the long line of priestesses, then his eyes settled on her. He strode up to her quickly, and held his hand out. She was obligated to take it. A gasp ran through the girls as she placed her small, white hand in his.

He led her away from the line, so that she stood where all could see her. She would soon hold the one of the most honored positions in the Temples: Priestess of the Priests, the High Priest's consort.

-----------------------

I removed my hand from the stone. My mind was confused, cloudy. Hadn't I just seen memories of the priestess with the Pharaoh? How in love they had seemed! And yet here she was, being chosen as the High Priest's consort! I could not understand. There was more I needed to know.

I hurried to the next room, the one housing the stone tablet of the Pharaoh. As I stood before it, I wondered what this stone knew. I reached out and firmly placed my palm on its surface.

"Come, my little bird, sit here."

The priestess smiled prettily and settled herself in the Pharaoh's lap. He smiled and kissed her.

"I want to ask you something very important," he murmured in her ear. "But we must both promise to keep it a secret. It would do no good for the whole city to know of it."

She nodded quickly, and he continued. "I want to ask you if you will marry me. But—" he said, cutting off her joyful response. "It has never happened before that the Pharaoh married anyone who was not royalty. You are a beautiful, wise, and gifted priestess, but you are no princess. Thus, I wish to keep this a secret between us, until we can be properly married by the priests so that none might have objections. I am fast friends with the High Priest. I'm sure he will assist us in this matter."

"I accept gladly, my Pharaoh."

"Do you say that simply because I am Pharaoh, or because you really mean it?"

"I do mean it, truly, my love."

The Pharaoh smiled, and they kissed passionately.

"The night wanes, my bird. Hurry back to the temple before they notice your prolonged absence. I will speak to you further tomorrow night."

"Good night my darling," she whispered, kissing him again.

"Be careful. I'll have guards escort you." She nodded, and disappeared into the hallways.

The next morning, as he breakfasted with one of his advisors, the Pharaoh asked him what the news of the kingdom was.

"Have you gone mad and forgotten? The temples are in a frenzy! The High Priestess is choosing her successor in the next few days, all the young priestesses are being reviewed. And the High Priest's select priests have come to examine them as well, for it is time for the High Priest to chose a consort. The brightest, most talented, and most beautiful priestesses will be vying for the positions."

"Why, do they compete for these stations? Can they choose not to participate?"

"Not according to Temple law. But why ever wouldn't a young priestess want the chance to be the High Priest's consort? In any case, the priestesses are holed up now in the Temple, and won't be coming out again until the decisions have been made. By the way, the young priestess assigned to this city is expected to be selected for one of the positions."

_The blood in the Pharaoh's veins nearly froze._


	15. Spreading Wings

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Thank you guys so much for the new reviews! It's very encouraging to know I have readers.

I'm in a very good mood because it's a three-day weekend and I spent almost all of yesterday watching Kenshin, so I decided to post the next chapter. I've also been inspired to work on (oddly enough) this fic, not my Kenshin one. My Kenshin one requires a great deal of thought, which would obviously make my head hurt.

Not much to respond to, but I will try to clarify some points of the story.

I can't, absolutely can't, explain every memory the main character has seen so far. It's not because I hate you all and want you to be utterly lost; it would give away WAY too much plot. So far, she's seen some memories: a priestess running through the rain to reach the Pharaoh because something has happened at the temple; the Pharaoh and the High Priest's final duel (this one makes more sense if you've seen the anime); the same priestess dueling somebody using the Dark Magician Girl; the priestess being chosen as the High Priest's consort; and the priestess agreeing to marry the Pharaoh. None of this is necessarily in the chronological order that the memories took place in, which might be why it's slightly confusing. I keep it that way to maintain a sense of mystery and confusion; the main character knows about as little as you (the readers) do.

Only I, the author, am all-knowing and understands what the heck the memories mean.

I hope that clarifies something… I know that in the Word docs every specific memory was italicized and that some of it might have been lost when uploading; I'll check that and try to fix it. If there are still questions, please email me via my profile.

Anyways, I'll shut up now and start the chapter.

Chapter 14: Spreading Wings

My heart was beating fast. So. The priestess loved the Pharaoh. The Pharaoh loved the priestess. But the priestess was chosen to be the High Priest's consort. And therein lay the dilemma. But how did that connect to the great duel Yami had shown me, or the memory I had first found in his mind?

And what if the priestess had betrayed the Pharaoh? What if she had only used him, knowing full well she would likely become the High Priest's consort? Was she running back to him in the first memory I saw? Or was that before she'd become the Priest's Priestess?

The memories were too few and far between for me to construct a cogent story out of. I knew too little. My only solution was to know more. Surely Kaiba, as the High Priest incarnate, would remember something. And there were many doors still left in Yami's mind. And these stone tablets might even know more.

As I left the room with the Pharaoh's tablet, I felt the strong pull of another tablet, one that urged me to view its memories. I darted through the secret rooms, looking for the elusive tablet. It was nowhere to be found. Yet still it called to me, pleading with me. I needed to see those memories, it was saying. But it would not tell me where it was.

I heard the honking of a car outside and knew Kaiba had arrived to take me away. Reluctantly, I climbed the stairs back up into the house. I picked up my small bag and walked away from the house, promising that I would find the stone tablet that called so strongly to me.

The first thing I noticed when I arrived at Kaiba's mansion was that I did not have my own room. He led me up the stairs into the master bedroom. Once there, he pointed to the door to a walk-in closet.

"Unpack your things. I took the liberty of buying you some appropriate clothes. Try some on and find something that fits well, so that we know what size you are. Dinner's usually at six-thirty." He'd gone back to being cold and aloof. In the time since the kiss in the park, he'd avoided that part of our relationship. It was, again, strictly a business marriage.

After changing, I sat down on the edge of the enormous bed. I almost tried to Channel with Yugi for comfort, but decided against it. Instead, I sat silently, gazing out the huge French doors that led to the balcony. The sky was a beautiful color, and as the minutes passed I watched the colors change as the sun prepared to set.

I wished that I could stand on the edge of the railing of the balcony and jump off, to spread my wings and soar away into the heart of the pink and orange sky.

In a few minutes Kaiba came back for me. I admitted to myself that he looked rather dashing, in his linen shirt, black slacks, and long coat. We avoided each other's gaze as he offered me his arm and led me to the dining room.

The room was large, and very cold. A fire was crackling merrily in the fireplace, but the room had the feel of an empty, unused room. The table was long and designed to fit many diners. Tonight, as with most nights, only three chairs were occupied.

Kaiba sat at the head of the table, his younger brother Mokuba and I sitting on either side of him. The multi-course meal was stiff, silent, and very uncomfortable. Mokuba tried several times to converse with Kaiba, but he refused. Mokuba looked disappointed, as if Kaiba usually did not treat him like this.

Neither of them attempted conversation with me. I think Mokuba was a little scared of me.

I failed to notice Kaiba continuously glancing in my direction, as if to appraise my comfort level.

After the extremely discomforting dinner, we went into Kaiba's study to relax. I almost laughed. I could never imagine Kaiba relaxed. I would also learn that the study was rarely used as a study; his real workplace was an office packed with computers and programming equipment adjacent to his bedroom.

Mokuba settled down with math homework as Kaiba began reading over business reports. Despite my "excellent business training," I didn't understand a word of the papers. Instead, I sat on the floor beside Mokuba and watched him struggle with geometry.

I leaned my head back against the couch, straining to make myself comfortable in this cold, distant house. A fire burned here too, but lent no warmth to our little scene. Picturesque to anyone else, torture for those involved.

Finally, I couldn't take it any longer. I stood, and was ready to excuse myself when I saw Mokuba look anxiously at his brother. He seemed to want to ask him something, but was reluctant to do so. Perhaps it was because of Kaiba's behavior at dinner.

With a sigh, I leaned over and asked what was wrong. Mokuba looked at me, surprised, and said, "I… I don't know how to do this problem…"

Kaiba looked up, and was ready to get up and help. I turned my back to him and knelt beside Mokuba, and began to explain the intricacies of the particular proof.

When I was done and Mokuba understood the problem, I politely excused myself and returned to Kaiba's bedroom.


	16. Sleeping

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

OMG I've been overwhelmed with reviews… Ayame akakaru Kaiba finally returned (yay!) so I have a lot to say (and some clarifications to make?)

I will respond to those reviews en masse, which means they'll probably make very little sense, even to her.

-She's old enough. Let's leave it at that. Actually, I never came up with either age or name for her, and that's the way it's going to stay.  
-Authoress smirks evilly Yes, but only I know what happens between Kaiba, Yami, and the main character.  
-I didn't know that either, I just made it up. Actually, okay, I'll clarify what happened now. As Yami told her, the stones have memories, just like people. Assuming the power in the stones is great enough, the stones can also show her memories.  
-Cliches are fun. I didn't particularly like that line, but I needed something in there to make the rhythm of the paragraph right. Plus I love Kaiba's eyes.  
-I never doubted your vocabulary (hey, we all have to take the SAT, right? Provided you're in America)  
-Don't you love how I play with you by manipulating time?  
-I know that song! (Sings along)  
_I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,_  
_I can see all obstacles in my way_  
_Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind_  
It's gonna be a bright, bright   
_Sun-Shiny day_  
_It's gonna be a bright, bright_  
Sun-Shiny day  
I have no idea who sang that (Bob Marley…?)  
-I make the main character think for the benefit of any confused readers. That's all.  
-Mmm, the tablets are an interesting question that will be clarified in a much later chapter. However, I'll give you this much: the tablets are housed in "secret" basement rooms in the house, put there by her guardians. The guardians are there to help her figure out what's going on. That's about all for now…  
-Well, assume for now that the mansion has no extra bedrooms or something, if that makes you feel more comfortable.  
-Oro!? Well, then you won't like this chapter much… (pats Kaiba on the back—don't worry, some of my reviewers are a little crazy.)  
-That's just the way Kaiba is, ne?  
-??? Where was Mokuba being rude? I hope I didn't do that!  
-LOL Well he IS a Kaiba, right? Kaibas are smart like that.  
-Nice people make me happy. Therefore… I don't know.

The name of my RK fic is The Four Swords (shameless self-promotion!) and you can find it by going to my profile. (Everybody should go read!) There's no romance there yet; I just spent four chapters introducing the main characters.

Meant to write more but I spent all day Thursday waiting to see my band in the inauguration parade! Yay way to go my darling ALTO SAXES! (Yes, I know, we have a love-hate relationship) OOOO and Emlee on CSPAN!!! She was right on the end freezing her fingers off!!! Hahaha and GOV TEAM got to be on Channels 2, 7, 9, and 11!!! Though it's not like they actually asked us intelligent questions about the election or the inauguration or government… just about the damn band.

Dude, Gov team is SO going to Nationals this year…

Anyway, enough of the authoress' random ramblings. Now for very short chapter indeed…

Chapter 15: Sleeping

I dug through my bags for my nightdress and underwear, then showered and changed. All the Channeling that morning had worn me out.

Freshly showered and changed, I stood uncertainly at the edge of the large bed. I was uncomfortable about the thought of sleeping in the same bed with Kaiba, but the bed was surely large enough to provide some space. I could see no place else, in any case.

However, I found the little couch in my closet. Instead of pulling it out into the main room, I left the door to the closet open and covered myself with a coat. If Kaiba looked for me, he was sure to find me.

I didn't realize that the Kaiba that I could have slept with was, at that moment, having a pillow fight with his little brother, a genuine smile gracing his handsome face and the iciness gone from his beautiful eyes.

I fell asleep quickly, only to be awakened what felt like a few moments later. I lay very still, to give the impression that I was still asleep.

Kaiba was kneeling beside me, one hand gently resting over mine and the other stroking my hair. I was surprised at the intimacy and emotion he was demonstrating. I had never thought he would be like this.

With a soft sigh he stood, and remained beside the couch for a few moments. I imagined he was deliberating what to do with me now. After a minute's consideration, he leaned over and slid an arm under my knees. He used the other hand to lift my head and slipped it underneath. He lifted me from the couch, and, thus cradling me, carried me back to the bed.

He shifted my body in his arms so that he could draw the comforter and sheets aside. Gently, he lay me down and covered me snugly. I heard him walk to the other side of the room, the side with the closets. He must have been changing.

I felt him slide into the bed from the other side. Rather than stay on that side, though, he slid all the way over until he lay very close, only a hand's length away. Timidly, he reached out and touched my shoulder. When I didn't respond, he pulled himself closer, until he was lying comfortably against me.

What surprised me most was that I said nothing. Though I was conscious the whole time, and consciously objecting to his touch and presence, I didn't do anything to stop him.


	17. Trials of Love

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm posting TWO chapters today because I'm in such a wonderful mood (and it's finals week, so I have 3 extra hours every day).

Also, I've answered a bunch of reviews on my LJ ) from: **Robin IV, Butterfly Girl 1331, trixy, Amanda, faeriefan**, and **Ayame Akakaru Kaiba**. Please check there, since I probably won't answer too many reviews here unless they're pertinent to clarifying the story. Not that I don't love you all, it's just that I'm lazy.

Chapter 16: Trials of Love

The final three months before the wedding passed quickly. I remember nothing concerning the wedding preparations.

I take that back. I remember trying on the wedding dress, a beautiful creation of white silk and satin, picked in tiny seed pearls. It fit me perfectly. The strapless bodice rested easily on me, flowing into a long, full skirt. As I turned before a mirror, I remember thinking that had the circumstances of the marriage not been so unpleasant, I would have adored this dress.

My bouquet was an enormous bunch of red and pink roses, their heavenly scent filling the room. Two dozen roses, each petal perfectly smooth and silky. My ring was the most gorgeous piece of jewelry I'd ever seen: a small, heart-shaped diamond set between two perfect rubies in yellow gold. The wedding favors were beautifully decorated glass boxes filled with tiny candies and a specially designed Duel Monsters card commemorating our marriage. If the circumstances of the marriage not been so unpleasant, I would have fussed over the details.

I peeked out from the dressing room into the hallway, where I heard Kaiba talking to Mokuba. Neither of them was allowed to see me in my dress. As I spied, I saw the Kaiba that Mokuba knew: the happy and warm and loving young man who teased his brother and ruffled his hair affectionately, who took his brother out to the beach on weekends and corrected his math homework every night

Had the circumstances of the marriage not been so unpleasant, I might have loved Kaiba.

---------------

I remember much more of what happened between Yami and myself.

It happened without me realizing it, and it happened without me realizing the dangerous portents of our actions.

It happened subtly and yet boldly. It was harsh and yet soothing. It was ugly and yet beautiful.

It would save me, and ultimately destroy me.

Yami and I fell in love.


	18. A Lonely Pharaoh

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I didn't surprise anybody last chapter, did I?

Chapter 17: A Lonely Pharaoh

As I said before, I hardly realized it was happening until it was too late. When I told her about it later, she said it was a reaction to marrying Kaiba. I needed and craved love, for the first time in five thousand years. I could not, or refused to, find that love in my engagement to Kaiba. And so I turned to Yami.

Considering all the events that followed, I think it was only meant to be. Sometimes I think I may not even have really been in love with Yami; it had happened simply because it was supposed to.

But most of the time, I think it was real.

----------

It started out with me Channeling more and more often. As the day of the wedding approached I became more and more desperate. I sought many ways out of the confines of my relationship with Kaiba. I spent as little time as possible in the house. If I had to stay there, I worked in the gardens or read on the balcony. I went out shopping, not to shop but just to be out. And I Channeled every night before Kaiba came to bed.

Yami welcomed me every time. He waited for me to arrive, and when I did he led me through the maze of his mind. When I stopped before a door he could not see, he waited patiently for me outside. Sometimes, he would be able to see the door too. Most of the time, he declined to see the memory.

"If I am to see the memory, I will. If it is necessary to me understanding my fate, then I will be able to unlock the door myself, without your presence."

More often than not, though, Yami and I simply talked. I revealed few of my secrets to him, like the Crown and its powers, or the past five thousand years I'd seen. But we talked about Destiny and Fate, and the possibilities of his past. We talked about the present, and the daunting future.

-------------

When Yami discussed his future, he rarely thought too far in advance. I wondered how he and Yugi were going to make it through. What would happen to Yami, when his Destiny was fulfilled? How would Yugi's aging affect him? A whole multitude of issues arose from the fact that two souls shared one body.

He did, however, talk about what he vaguely remembered from his time as Pharaoh.

"I must have wanted to love, and be loved in return." I sucked in my breath sharply. Should I tell him what I had seen? He looked at me sideways, and shook his head. "Don't tell me anything. I must have wanted children," he continued. "Maybe I only wanted a son to take over my throne. Or maybe even a daughter."

"A daughter to raise to marry, or a daughter to raise to rule?" I asked curiously.

Yami smiled wryly. "More likely the former. But now I think that the latter would be equally as wonderful." I smiled inwardly. "After all," he continued, "that was how power was passed through the Temples. Women commanded greater power and communicated directly with the gods. The Priests revered their Priestess for that reason. I don't remember much of the religious hierarchy, but I'm certain the women were much more important."

"What else?" I asked curiously.

"I don't remember. Surely there were goals for my Kingdom, goals for my people and…" he murmured, returning to the original question.

"Personal goals, Yami. Nothing?"

He sat silently, looking down. "Nothing I can remember. Perhaps a family was the only thing important to me. Maybe love was what the lonely Pharaoh needed."

"Indeed. And maybe there was only one woman who could love him."

Our eyes met and locked, and we sat in contemplative silence.


	19. Wedding Invitations

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, I have this chapter and one more ready to go, but the one after that I'm editing so it might take awhile. Also, I'll probably update once more but then I'll be gone for FIVE DAYS!!! Constitution Team is headed to Sacramento for State Competition next week Wednesday-Friday, and I've got stuff on Saturday and an interview on Sunday, so I won't be able to update too much!

Replied to reviews by **Ayame Aka Kaiba** on my LJ.

Chapter 18: Wedding Invitations

I didn't realize that Kaiba had not selected a wedding party. I had expected that, as the one in charge of the wedding, that he had done that first. But, as he revealed to me one night over a silent dinner, he had only selected Mokuba as the ring-bearer.

"Is there anyone you'd like to invite to the wedding?" he asked quietly.

After a moment of silence, I replied, "Does it matter?"

The question seemed to have caught him off-guard, because it took him a moment to say, "Yes…"

"Fine." I stood, left the table, and went upstairs to my desk. Ever since moving in I'd done nothing at it but sit idly, writing stories or working random figures. Ripping out a piece of pink stationary, I scribbled seven names and addresses on it. Then I folded the paper and went back downstairs. Silently, I sat back down and pushed the paper over in front of Kaiba's plate.

And went back to eating.

He lifted the paper and cautiously opened it. After reading the names, I thought he would refuse my request. Instead, he nodded, refolded the paper, placed it in the breast pocket of his shirt, and continued eating.

--------------

A few days later, I was lounging on the balcony reading when I heard the doorbell ring. I ignored it, since the butler would answer it and send the visitors on their way. That was the way it always was. Kaiba's business associates would be smart enough to go to his office instead. And I never had visitors.

Today, though, I wasn't aware of the visitors' presence until the maid had opened the French doors and was telling the guests that I would be right with them. Surprised, I put my book down and looked over my shoulder at my visitors.

Tea, Mai, and Serenity were standing, somewhat uncomfortably, in front of the doors. With a little cry I jumped up and ran to hug them each in turn.

"You have quite a nice place here," Mai remarked.

"It's so lonely though. I don't do anything, ever. And I never see anybody either. I'm so glad you came! Why didn't the butler send you away?"

"We showed him these," Tea said, pulling a small white card decorated with pressed flowers and pink ribbons out of her purse.

"They're so beautiful!" Serenity exclaimed. "Thank you so much for inviting us!"

I smiled. So Kaiba had gone through on it. I was surprised.

"We're supposed to get fitted for dresses…" Tea added doubtfully.

"Oh. Really? For what?"

"To be your bridesmaids, silly!" Mai exclaimed happily. "You'd better have picked out something drop-dead gorgeous. Kaiba can afford it."

I flushed with embarrassment. "I don't know what's going on… I didn't pick you to be my bridesmaids! I thought Kaiba picked them for me… I only told him I wanted to you be invited."

"Well sweetheart you've got three beautiful bridesmaids now. Come on, let's see the dresses!" Mai shouted impatiently.

"I don't… I didn't…" I trailed off, flustered. "Kaiba didn't tell me anything. Perhaps… Oh, what the heck. Let's just go out and find something!" I cried happily. "We'll have to visit the woman who designed and made my wedding dress. It's so pretty! I'm sure she'll be able to make you three something equally as beautiful."

"Never rival the bride's beauty," Tea teased. "It's bad luck."

I laughed, giddy with excitement. "Then the three of you shouldn't have been invited!"

We swept out of the room, laughing and bantering happily. It promised to be the most fun I'd had in a long time.


	20. Dinner

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ahhhh gomen!!! It's my last chapter for a while (I think) and it's such a short chapter… been very busy recently, rewriting this chapter, as well as this story's Chapter 33 (which is taking me FOREVER to finish… gods I just can't seem to end it), and Chapter 6 of my Kenshin fanfic (I came to a screeching halt when I got to Okita's section, sadly enough).

For those of you who don't know, I'm now replying to reviews on my LJ, . You're welcome to comment there, too.

Oh, also, shameless self-advertising (courtesy of Ayame Aka Kaiba): READ MY KENSHIN FIC!!! The title is The Four Swords, and you can get to it by clicking on the link for my profile above.

Finally, sorry some of my lameness leaked into this chapter. I couldn't figure out what the heck I wanted to happen, so random things just… started happening. Basically. Parts of it are really lame. I apologize in advance.

Chapter 19: Dinner

We didn't finish looking for dresses until later that evening, just before dinner. I didn't want to say good-bye to my friends so soon, so I called the mansion and told the cook I was bringing guests for dinner. She sounded surprised, but said she would be ready.

When we pulled up into the curved driveway, I was surprised to see another car also parked in the driveway. Kaiba's limo had its own garage behind the house, and the car he sometimes used was kept at the office.

Once inside, I was shocked to see more than two people sitting at the table for dinner. I almost cried when I saw who was there.

"Hey," Yugi said in his usual, friendly manner. I ran to hug him, Joey, Tristan, and Duke. Beaming happily, I asked them why they were here.

"We got your invitations in the mail today, and they said to go to Kaiba's office. Turns out we were supposed to get fit for tuxes," Tristan said.

"Apparently, we're supposed to be the groomsmen," Joey said with a big smile. "And Yugi's Kaiba's best man!"

"Oh," I was all I could say. I was surprised. Not only had Kaiba let Joey be in the wedding, he'd asked Yugi to be his best man.

"And now we get to stay for dinner!" Duke cried. "Free food!" he, Joey, and Tristan yelled in unison. The rest of us blushed, embarrassed.

"Can't take them anywhere, can we?" Tea asked, rolling her eyes.

I had barely noticed Kaiba and Mokuba already seated at the table, although Yugi had begun to talk to Mokuba. Without acknowledging Kaiba, I took my usual place beside him.

----------

Dinner was a most lively affair. Mai sat to my left, and we spent all night teasing Joey and Tristan, who was flirting with Serenity. Duke was livid over Tristan's attentions, and immediately began vying for Serenity's favor. Tea and Yugi talked quietly to Mokuba, but were inevitably drawn into the fun.

I left my old, demure shell behind and became a vivacious and outgoing young woman. I taunted and baited the guys, laughed with Mai, conspired with Tea and Serenity, joked with Yugi, and flirted rather shamelessly with Duke. Energy rushed through my veins in place of blood, tingling and exciting.

"Hey, Joey, if you're not going to eat that can I have it?" Tristan asked, digging his fork into 'it'.

"What do you think you're doing? That's my food!" Joey stabbed Tristan's fork with his, and they began sparring with their forks. Calmly, I reached over with mine, speared the piece of potato, and ate it.

"Actually, it's mine now," I murmured sweetly.

Duke burst out laughing. "Why you!" Joey yelled, raising his fork at Duke. He stopped laughing, eyes narrowed.

"Look Joey, I didn't have anything to do with that. She took it on her own," I smirked at Joey. "But if you want to play fork wars…" Duke said, raising his own fork.

"Oh man," Tea moaned. "I can't believe the guys are playing fork wars at the Kaiba mansion."

Mai laughed. "Boys will be boys, right? You gals had better pick your knights—Joey's mine."

I smiled. "Well, he's not going to win at this rate," I said, pointing. Tristan and Duke had ganged up on Joey, both of them dragging food off his plate.

"Oh," Mai groaned. "The one day Joey doesn't defend his food to the death…"

--------------

"Let's play a game!" Mokuba piped up from his seat next to Kaiba. We all turned to look, intrigued.

"What kind of game, Mokuba?" Yugi asked in his ever-pleasant way.

"Something less embarrassing than fork wars," Tea muttered under her breath. Duke and Tristan snickered.

"Hey, it's not every day you get to use special Kaiba forks in fork wars," Tristan joked under his breath. I stifled a laugh, not daring to look at Kaiba to see what he thought of his forks being thus abused.

"I don't think that's what my brother wanted them used for either. So let's play something less… destructive," Mokuba suggested slyly.

"Why do I not like the sound of 'less destructive'?" Tea asked with a sigh.

"Because you asked for less embarrassing," I teased.

Mokuba caught my eye and smiled. I smirked back. He winked at me. That kid had a fast mind.

"After dinner, Mokuba," I suggested. "I think Joey's going to need more food."


	21. Kaiba's Love

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Muahahahaha! Apologies to Ayame aka Kaiba—the thinking has returned! Thankfully this chapter's quite a bit longer than usual… around 1600 words.

Also, sorry it's been so long since I updated… I was hoping to post this before I left for Sacramento but obviously that didn't happen. Very busy last week preparing for the competition… And now we're all confused and in some kind of emotional hellhole together… Sorry, nobody understood that. Read my LJ for more info.

Anyway, I'll shut up now and start the chapter.

Replied to reviews by **Ayame aka Kaiba** and **Robin IV** on my LJ.

Chapter 20: Kaiba's Love

Little did I realize that Kaiba watched me. I had expected him to be mad, I think, and so when he was not I simply forgot about him. Indeed, he watched the new light on my face, the light that shone in my usually dark and curtained eyes. He saw the shine on my lips, from lip gloss and running the tip of my tongue over it as I flirted. He noticed the new flush in my cheeks, transforming normally bland skin into healthy pink roses. He heard the new, excited pitch in my voice, heard my voice at a volume louder than a murmured reply. He saw the animation in my arms and hands and fingers as I laughed and joked with my friends.

In fact, I think seeing me this way made Kaiba a little sad. This was the woman he would never know, because he could never open himself to me. This was the woman he had fallen in love with, but who would never love him.

The Kaiba that Mokuba knew, the Kaiba that I could have loved, was too afraid of rejection to allow himself to be seen. The façade he kept up was only a protection, a way to stay in a relationship with me without any risks.

He grew jealous, but not angry, when I traded places with Mai and sat beside Duke. I felt safe flirting with Duke; he was my friend, and I was engaged to Kaiba in any case. I teased him and fed him small morsels of food with my fingers. I rubbed my shoulder against his and lay my head against his arm. My eyes, mouth, and fingers conveyed the surge of sensuality I felt.

I didn't realize that Kaiba felt sad upon seeing this too. I expected jealousy, and perhaps in a subconscious way I wanted him to be angry. I wanted to lure him into admitting that he had feelings for me, and that seeing me act this way towards another man hurt him.

But he didn't. He had always suspected, almost known, that I cared little for him. This was only confirmation. I would never be this way around him. The one woman that he finally admitted that he loved refused to love him in return. Other woman would throw themselves at his feet for what I had, but instead I remained cold and aloof. This, this vivacious and beautiful and flirtatious and sensual young woman was who Kaiba wanted.

But it seemed to him that I could never love him.

-

After dinner was over we went to the living room and settled ourselves on couches and chairs. For the sake of our engagement I sat beside Kaiba on a loveseat. He sat bolt upright, while I lounged comfortably, half-laying on what remained of the couch, my feet curled beside Kaiba's hip.

"So, what did you have in mind, Mokuba?" Yugi asked.

He smiled wickedly. "Truth or Dare."

Tea laughed nervously. "I haven't played that for years."

"Awww, come on Tea, don't be a spoilsport," Tristan pleaded teasingly.

She frowned heavily. "I just don't think…"

"Just go along with it, Tea. What's the worst that could happen?" Duke asked, toying with his bangs.

She huffed but stayed silent, glowering slightly at the rest of us. It brought a slight smile to my face—not because I liked Tea mad, but because I saw how easily she let Duke grate her nerves and how clearly she wouldn't mind playing.

"I'll start," Mokuba volunteered. Tea literally melted into the couch she was sitting on. Yugi was already half-hidden by Joey's shadow. The rest of us were clearly visible.

"Hmmm," Mokuba said to himself, eyeing each of us in turn, trying to determine his first victim. "I pick… Duke." Duke grinned wickedly. Mokuba returned the favor.

"Truth," Duke announced coolly.

"Well then…"

-

The game went on around me. Though I was in plain view, no one ever picked on me to answer. I liked it that way. I could observe my friends and Mokuba, how easily they interacted. Although I sensed that sometimes they disliked the young boy (no doubt for his loyalty to his older brother, with whom the gang had had several unpleasant run-ins) they generally liked him and treated him as a younger brother.

They all—even Tea—played gamely and honestly. I watched them laugh and shriek and point accusingly at each other—but every one enjoyed themselves. Only Kaiba and I seemed to be on the outskirts, outsiders looking in. I tentatively poked at the edges of his mind with my own, unsure of whether or not he'd let me in.

He was still closed to me, but from the fringes of his mind I garnered something else: sadness. As I picked up what I could, I made a startling—and yet not so surprising—discovery.

Kaiba and I were outsiders for one reason: neither of us had had much of a childhood. We watched like this now because we did not know how to react, did not know how to be one of them. Kaiba, I would discover, had spent his childhood growing up, and that was all. He'd learned business skills at a young age, and had been put through grueling training in his pre-teens and teens.

I didn't remember what my childhood was like, but it certainly couldn't have been all fun and games. Otherwise, I think I might have remembered such simple happiness.

It felt so odd, to share something so personal with Kaiba, that I reached over and laid my hand on his elbow. When he looked at me, I gave a little half-smile and moved closer, turning my body so that I leaned tentatively against him and my feet faced the end of the couch. He looked surprised for a moment, and I felt his body tense as I carefully laid my weight against him, but he made no move to stop me.

-

"I pick… you," Duke said suddenly, bringing his finger down to point at me.

"Hmm?" I asked, sitting up, slightly confused.

"It's your turn. You haven't done anything yet. I challenge you to take a Dare," he said, smirking slightly.

"If you insist," I murmured, half-lidding my eyes. This ought to be interesting… I thought.

"Hmmm… what would be good…" Duke thought aloud, eyes closed, long fingers tapping his pointed chin. "I know!" he said, snapping his fingers. "Come here," he beckoned to me. "I want this to be a surprise for the rest of you," he said, glaring at the others, who were attempting to listen. "And it'll be a good one."

I pretended to pout and crawled off the couch to him. I knelt beside him and let him whisper in my ear.

"Kiss Kaiba," he said, voice low.

"What?" I asked, eyes widening in shock.

"You heard me," he hissed, pulling me back to him. I pulled away again and narrowed my eyes.

"Hey," he said, green eyes twinkling with mischief. "It's a game, remember? And you agreed to play."

"Inadvertently…" I muttered. "Fine. I'll do it."

"Oh, and if you can get him to kiss you back, I'll pay for you the next time we all go out to dinner together."

My eyes lit up at the challenge. Some part of me did love a challenge. "Fine," I hissed, eyes narrowed gleefully. "How am I supposed to prove he kisses me back?"

Duke smirked. "I'll know, don't worry. You won't get cheated. Although I'm not so sure you'll even win this one… we are talking about Kaiba."

"Right," I said shortly, standing. "You think what you like, Duke." I strode quickly across the room before I lost my nerve.

As soon as I stood before Kaiba, I turned back to smirk at Duke. Then, without further hesitation, I sat in Kaiba's lap, took his face between my hands, and brought his lips to mine. I kissed him, hard, waiting and praying that he would not only open up to me, but also kiss me back. This was still nothing more than a challenge I wanted to win.

Kaiba's dark blue eyes widened, and I felt his body tense beyond belief. There was dead silence behind me as the others watched, probably in some kind of morbid fascination. My kisses became firmer and more demanding as I waited for Kaiba to respond.

I was rewarded when I felt his body loosen, and his hands moved up my arms until they had reached my shoulders. Tentatively, slowly, he pulled me in by pressing my shoulders and kissed me back. I smiled, and returned the favor.

I was surprised that neither of us stopped, that for some reason or another we kept kissing. I don't know, even now, why I continued to rest in his lap and caress his lips with mine. Nor do I know why he tolerated—no, accepted and desired—me, although in retrospect I understand better.

When at last we broke away from each other, we gazed deep into each other's eyes, searching for answers. I didn't even think about my bet with Duke. Slowly, I shifted myself off his lap and broke the gaze. I could sense that he was still watching me, surprised and confused. I settled back into my old position, and this time, his body relaxed against mine.

You owe me, I mouthed to Duke, eyes glinting mischievously. He smiled, and nodded.

-

Just a few minutes later my friends left, each promising to see me before the wedding and me eagerly accepting their promises. I felt flushed and alive for the first time since my engagement.

"We're going to the dance at the high school," Tristan said. "Why don't you come with us?"

"I don't think so. I should probably stay here…"

Duke shrugged. "Suit yourself. We'll be there if you feel like coming."

"Thanks. Maybe I'll take you up on that," I replied, winking mischievously.

-

AUTHOR'S NOTE: OOOOO Let's see if you can guess what happens after this! (Hint: I'm going to have to up the rating on the story for it)


	22. Not Without You

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Decided to wait until Ayame aka Kaiba returned from wherever she was to update… sorry, it feels like a long time since I last updated even though I think it was Sunday (and today is Thursday, so…)

Everything's pretty peachy in my world (for anyone that cares), except that I have English homework (but Stats got pushed back to Tuesday! And we have no school on Monday!) –yawn- That should mean some massive writing/updating over the weekend…

Still have not overcome the massive Okita roadblock in my RK fic or the wedding roadblock in this fic… -sobs-

In more interesting news, I finally saw some episodes of the English version of YGO that I'd missed, that I think should help me quite a bit with this story. But in much, MUCH later chapters. This thing is turning into some freaking epic or something… -glowers-

Oh, and sorry, we're back to pretty short chapters again. I apologize profusely.

Responded to reviews by **trixy** and **Ayame aka Kaiba** on my LJ.

Chapter 21: Not Without You

Kaiba and Mokuba had disappeared into the study when I escorted my friends out. I didn't feel like joining them. I couldn't stand to be stifled now, when I felt so wonderful. Instead, I hurried upstairs, changed my clothes, grabbed my purse and headed for a car, which Kaiba had provided for my use.

As I sat behind the steering wheel, ready to drive to the high school, I had a sudden idea. I climbed out of the car and raced up the stairs to the study. Kaiba and Mokuba looked up, surprised as I burst through the door.

"I thought you were going out," Kaiba said slowly.

"Not without you," I teased gently, grabbing his hands and pulling him off the couch. My eyes shone in the firelight like twin stars, drawing him in and shattering his defenses.

"Will you be all right by yourself?" I asked Mokuba. He nodded dumbly, and I smiled brightly. With a tinkling laugh I dragged Kaiba out to the car.

"Where are we going?" he demanded as I shoved him into the front passenger seat.

"You'll see," I replied, settling down in my seat. I gave him a look to tempt and excite him. There was no change on his face, but I saw his body shift restlessly as I drove to the high school.

-

The music was loud and the gym was packed when we got there. Rather than seek out my friends, though, I was anxious to dance. I needed to get rid of the excitement and sexual energy that had built up in me. I grasped Kaiba's hand and pulled him onto the dance floor with me.

It was awkward dancing with him at first, since his body did not naturally move in time with the music. He was too stiff to be comfortable. I kept dancing anyway. I stood facing him, moving my hips easily. As Kaiba's eyes began to dart warily, searching for a way out, I pressed my body against his, moving my hips harder and faster against his. Shock flitted through his eyes, and he let out a soft moan.

His hands grasped my shoulders and held me against him. I didn't mind the closeness of our bodies. In fact, I reveled in it. Wordlessly, I felt his body loosen and begin to move more naturally. His long, lithe body was well suited to dancing, and we were soon moving against each other with grace and ease.

I knew that I was deliberately tempting him, drawing him in and making his body desire the feel of mine against it. I sensed that people were watching us, but I ignored them too.

Let them stare. Let the guys gape in wonder that Seto Kaiba was suddenly human, with human emotions and desires. Let the girls stare at us and envy me, wishing it were their body against his and their eyes holding his. Let them. At this moment, I could hardly care.

-

When the music shifted to a slower tempo, I breathlessly led Kaiba off to the chairs and tables. He removed his coat, and I almost yelped with pleasure. He looked so terribly sexy in his black slacks and white dress shirt. As we settled down at a table I drew my chair up beside him and snuggled against him. Surprised, he tentatively reached his arm around my shoulders and drew me beside him.

I sat there, like a cat contentedly basking in the sunshine. I rested my hands on his chest, tracing the lines of his muscles with my fingers. Though he said nothing, and his face remained stoic, his body betrayed him. I smiled up at him as I ran my hands over his arms and chest.

As I cuddled against him, I knew what I wanted. And I knew, with very little doubt, that Kaiba would have few objections.

Smiling slyly, I tugged on his arm to get his attention. When he looked down at me, I pulled him up. I wanted to dance again.


	23. Love

AUTHOR'S NOTE: It took me a long time to update, but that's because I'm not getting many reviews (in fact, I meant to post this on Valentine's Day). The only reason I update at all is because Ayame aka Kaiba keeps reading and reviewing. From now on, I'm not updating until I get at least 1 review that isn't her (poor thing). I like to know people are reading… because otherwise I wouldn't even keep posting.

Let me iterate again the message in my profile: **NO REVIEWS, NO UPDATES**.

Chapters are short again. Very sad.

Ayame aka Kaiba's prediction will now come true, in as delicate and inoffensive a way as possible. Yell at me later.

Story's overall rating has not been upped because I don't think this quasi-lemon (probably not even that, I'm just being extra careful) warrants it, but if you think I should do tell me.

Oh, and I noticed randomly today as I was watching YGO that Kaiba has abnormally long legs. (Talk about random… sheesh)

And in case anyone was wondering, I'm actually NOT a Kaiba or Yami fangirl. My favorite character is actually Joey (lol) but I just decided to write my fic about Kaiba and Yami. Every time I watch the anime/American show I want to beat the crap out of Kaiba because he's such a jerk, and I always want to tell Yami to shut up and stop talking so much. But Joey… even though he does a lot of stupid things, he's really funny and he's the most realistic character, I think. There's something appealing about the reckless, rough-and-tumble guy…

On to the chapter now…

Responded to review by **Ayame aka Kaiba** on my LJ.

Chapter 22: Love

For several hours we danced together, out bodies moving with and against each other's. Everyone else disappeared, and it was only the two of us and the music.

At some point, Kaiba held me firmly against him and moved his body slightly differently. I could feel the difference, knew the difference, and felt the excited flush creep up my cheeks. He smirked at me and then leaned down and kissed me hard. Without hesitation I opened my mouth and drew him in.

It was beautiful. There are no words to describe what I felt at that moment. I loved Seto, then, with whatever of my heart was left. I didn't know why, but in some deep, subconscious way I understood his loneliness and his desire to be loved, and that I was the one woman truly capable of loving him.

When he broke away I saw the mischievous glint in his eyes. Coyly, I backed away from him, towards the door. His eyes remained locked on me, a lion tracking his prey, as he followed me.

Suddenly, I stopped and pulled him by the front of his shirt right up against my body. I stood on tiptoe and kissed him, then turned and scampered out the door, leaving him to chase me to the car.

I had never thought that Seto would be this way. As I drove us back to the mansion he could hardly keep his hands off me. They strayed, from my shoulder to the nape of my neck to my inner thigh to my cheek. I giggled happily, struggling to keep the car under control.

We'd hardly stopped in the driveway when he bolted out his door and was dragging me out of mine. Laughing breathlessly, I allowed him to lift me off the ground and carry me into the house and up the flight of stairs. He dumped me unceremoniously onto the bed, clambering on top of me. Straddling me, he unbuttoned his shirt and stripped it off.

I lifted my hips and dropped him to my side, then half-lay over him to kiss him. I ran my hand over his bare torso, finally sliding it beneath the waist of his pants. He moaned and tipped me over onto my back.

Before long, we were both naked and lying against each other, kissing madly and touching each other desperately. We moved, faster and harder, until there was nothing but the rhythm of our bodies against each other.


	24. My Kitten

REVISED AUTHOR'S NOTE 2/23/05: **Raiyne Nagakura** (formerly Ayame aka Kaiba) alerted me to a mistake (oh, gasp) in this chapter, so I amended it and re-posted it. Sorry for any inconveniences.

I've also responded to reviews by **yugikid**, **Phresule**, and **blue-eyes** on my LJ (for this chapter).

Wow, I wish my RK fic were this popular… (that's not a hint, that's just a straight-up comment).

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, well, well… Threats do work. –Evil smirk-

Thanks to all of you who responded to my plea for reviews and reviewed! It was encouraging to open my mailbox the afternoon after I posted Chapter 22 to find **two** new reviewers already! I've gotten more reviews since then… Thank you so much for letting me know you're out there! I don't necessarily need constant reviewing, but a review once in a while just to let me know you exist is VERY refreshing. If you have the chance, **please** keep reviewing!

An apology to Ayame aka Kaiba: The thinking has returned yet again. And it will continue to return, again and again and again. I'm just a very brain-centered authoress.

I'm thinking of putting up a new personal website (as yet another place I could host this darling fanfic/epic), but that's still quite a ways away. Especially since I found out today I got a B+ in AP Bio first semester, and have thus kissed good-bye to expectations of acceptance letters from Harvard, Stanford, Dartmouth, and Pomona come April 1.

But hell, I got into UC Riverside with a Regent's Scholarship. Dare I ask for more…?

Updates to this fic will probably be slowing down a little, since I have yet to finish Chapter 33 and am still struggling with my RK fic (though I'm quite pleased with what I have so far). I have the chapters written, I just forget to post them while I'm online. Oh, and there's that little thing called high school… not that I do much anymore, since I'm a senior, but I have this bad tendency to procrastinate on the few things that I DO have…

Sorry, this note now seems longer than the chapter… -blushes- Gomennasai…

Responded to reviews by **yugikid**, **littleslg**, **Kaiba/Joey/Bakura fan**, **Ayame aka Kaiba**, and on my LJ.

Chapter 23: My Kitten

The next morning, the sun peeped through the silk curtains across the French doors and fell across my eyes. It was gentle enough to make me feel drowsy and remain in bed, but bright enough to keep my eyes open. I found that Seto's naked body was still pressed against mine, his arms wrapped around me just below my breasts. His head was resting gently against my neck and on my shoulder. His breath fell even and comforting on my bare shoulder, and his soft hair tickled my cheek.

I smiled happily. For the first time since the engagement, I felt content.

Seto woke up as I was dozing off again. He stirred, then began caressing my neck. I laughed sleepily and pulled away.

"Good morning, Seto," I murmured into his hair.

"Good morning, my kitten," he replied into my shoulder.

He finally sat up and stretched. I openly admired his beautifully built body, and he smirked at me. He collapsed back down onto the bed. "I don't want to get up. I don't feel like doing anything today. But I need to get back to Kaiba Corp."

"I don't think the company will fail without you there for one day," I pouted.

Seto sighed. "I don't think so either, but I have a big meeting today. The Board of Directors is conducting their yearly assessment of my performance and so forth."

"You have a Board of Directors? Who have that degree of control over you?"

He nodded slowly. "A remnant of my stepfather's reign. They're all still fiercely loyal to him, and would have taken over the company long ago if I hadn't kept it so lucrative. They want the power and prestige, so they stay on the Board, but they don't want to work hard enough to run the company themselves. And I can't dispel them completely, because then people will talk of my unchecked power over the company."

I smiled wryly. "Well go then. Take a shower and get dressed, and then come back."

He laughed gently, leaning over to kiss me. "Don't worry, my tigress. I'll be back as soon as I can."

After Seto left for the office, I lounged around. I lay sprawled on the bed for a few hours, aimlessly flipping through magazines. For a little while, I wrapped myself in a silk robe and sat out on the balcony, feeling the breeze lift my hair and caress my cheeks. I wandered out into the garden, still dressed in my nightdress and robe, winding my way through roses and violets and honeysuckle.

I was trying to come to terms with what had just happened. I had no words to explain what I felt, or why I felt it. But it was as if I suddenly knew how Seto felt. I knew that he was lonely, so lonely, and that he could never become close to anyone. Men were jealous of him and avoided him, or were like Joey and found him so aloof that they despised him. Women wanted him for his wealth and power. Only Mokuba accepted, or knew, who he really was.

All those months ago, when he'd told me that there was more in this deal than my company, he had been hoping that I could love him. He'd fallen in love with the girl who, instead of fawning over him and trying to seduce him, had narrowed her eyes and fought him. He'd fallen in love with her openness and honesty; she hid nothing from him, and let him know early that she was the one to be desired, not him.

I knew all this, and I knew that I loved him. And I couldn't explain it.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Anybody care to take a gamble as to what happens next-Mischievous grin-

Oh, and keep checking my profile. I've finally decided to put the thing to use and actually give my readers information on when my updates are and how my progress is coming. Also, my LJ is a good place to check, since that's where I respond to reviews and post random daily updates (you'll know all about my numerous RK fic roadblocks, which I run across quite frequently). You can find the link to my LJ in my profile as well (if that link doesn't work, my username on LJ is fairymage).


	25. Yami's Love

AUTHOR'S NOTE: OH NO-dun dun dun- CONFLICT! –Evil laughter-

My guilt over the threat, the ensuing increase in reviews, and the extremely short Chapter 23 made me post this chapter very quickly. Let's just say the authoress had a change of heart (hey, I know my YGO cards!).

And QuickEdit still hates me and my cool line breaks... so I have to use its lame one that goes all the way across the page and doesn't look very pretty... (

Thank **yugikid** for reminding me that my chapters are exceptionally short…

Responded to review by **Blackcat15200** on my LJ.

Chapter 24: Yami's Love

Even worse, however, I couldn't explain the deep guilt I was beginning to feel. Had I betrayed Yami? Indeed, I thought I loved him, in the same strange way I loved Seto. Yami was lonely, and a little sad. He knew, even though he'd never told me, that he'd lost something five thousand years ago. Perhaps the love that he so craved… and he knew that he'd lost it on his own, that his own actions had caused it to be lost forever.

But did I really? And did he love me?

My emotions were torn and confused. I knew I loved Seto, but the more I thought about it the more I realized I loved Yami too. But I could not gauge what was right, what was part of my Destiny and what was not. Which relationship would be struck down by Destiny? Was I really meant to love Seto when I married him? Or was I supposed to be the tragic heroine, and pledge my life to Seto while I loved Yami?

I didn't know. And I was afraid to find out.

My Channeling with Yami was accidental. I was waiting for Seto to return, to talk to him, and I dozed off as I lay on the bed. When my eyes opened, I was lying on the floor of Yami's mind.

He was seated against a wall, his knees drawn up close to him, and he watched me with a hawk's eyes.

"I saw you with Kaiba yesterday," he said shortly, standing up. He sounded unhappy, and a little petulant. He walked over until he was standing beside me, looking down on me.

"Well yes," I replied, affronted by his harsh tone. "I'm going to marry him in just a few months, and so I saw nothing wrong in spending some time with him."

"What happened at the dance? You didn't even look for Yugi or the others."

"Nothing. I danced. With Seto. And then we left."

"Together," he said sharply.

"Of course we left together," I snapped. "We did drive in the same car."

"What happened afterward?"

"That," I almost yelled, feeling the flush across my neck and cheeks, "is none of your business." I stood up, my temper flaring in my breast.

"So you slept with him." It was a statement, not a question.

"I didn't say that!"

"No, you didn't. But you said it all the same." Suddenly I noticed that Yami was no longer angry, but sad. Sad like Seto had been last night at dinner.

"What difference does it make to you?" I asked angrily, feeling the words catch in my throat and the stinging in my eyes.

"Everything," he whispered.

He pulled me towards him and kissed me.

* * *

It was a kiss that rivaled my kiss with Seto the night before. Without thinking I opened my mouth, and our tongues toyed with each other. His hands ran up and down my back, his body pressed firmly against mine.

Finally I pulled away from him. I was crying uncontrollably. I buried my head in his shoulder and sobbed.

"I love you," he whispered, breathing heavily. "I know I shouldn't; I know that everything is wrong for it, and that I shouldn't tell you because it will only hurt you, but I do."

"I love… oh, Yami. I'm so confused. These past few months… I thought I loved you, but I wasn't sure. I didn't want to say anything… I was afraid that I really didn't love you, and that my thinking it was so was just a reaction to being engaged to Seto. But then last night… Last night I found out that I really do love Seto. I don't know why, but I suddenly understand him. You were right, Yami, he's so lonely and sad and he needs me. But then… this morning… the more I thought about it the more certain I was that I loved you too. How can that be?"

"I only know that you have a great capacity for love, my little bird, and that I can only pray that some of the love will be spent on me."

"What do I do now? Do I marry Seto?"

"Do you love him?" I nodded, a little sadly. "Then there is even more reason that you should." I looked up at him, surprised. "If we are meant to be together, then we will be. I believe in Destiny, and I believe that what is between us is right. You are engaged to Seto Kaiba. It has been arranged for nearly a year. And you love him. There is no reason not to marry him."

I leaned into his chest, resting there, trying to absorb what had transpired in the last twenty-four hours. I don't know how long we stood there, but Yami suddenly told me Seto had returned.

"You'd better wake up," he murmured into my hair.

I nodded, and whispered, "I love you."


	26. Angry Words

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry for the late update! I wasn't paying attention to my calendar, so I thought I was supposed to update Sunday...

I changed the summary for the story, did anyone notice?

Responded to reviews by **yugikid**, **Phersule**, **Raiyne Nagakura**, and** blue-eyes** on my LJ.

* * *

Chapter 25: Angry Words"How was the meeting?" I asked groggily as I awoke from Channeling. 

"Not good," he muttered, tossing his coat onto the bed. I frowned, sensing his anger and frustration. He said nothing more. I decided not to press him.

Something terrible had happened at the meeting. I could feel it. He was cold, aloof, and angry. He lashed out at both Mokuba and me. At one point, Mokuba looked ready to cry. I saw the two tiny tears trickle down his face as Seto berated him for doing poorly on a history exam. Suddenly, I was angry.

"Stop it, Seto!" I yelled, grabbing his shoulder and turning him towards me. Mokuba took the opportunity and fled to his room. "Yell at me all you want, but don't you dare do that to your brother!"

"Stay out of this. It's none of your business," he said coldly.

"How can it not be? Mokuba will be my brother too in just a few weeks. Or have you forgotten, Seto? You're marrying me!"

"You! You're the cause of all of this!" he snarled, standing and shoving me away from him.

"Excuse me?" I demanded, forcing my chair back and standing defiantly.

"The Board of Directors has informed me that I'm now _on probation_. They've been waiting ever since I took over Kaiba Corp. to destabilize my position. And now they're watching me! Waiting for me to make the smallest mistake next! All because of _you_!" His fist slammed down on the table.

"You still haven't told me how this is my fault," I snapped, eyes narrowed.

"_Someone_ saw us together last night. It doesn't take a dimwit to speculate about what happened afterward. You were fairly obvious about it. Now there's dirty rumors and gossip, especially since no one knows who you are. You're not someone they expected me to marry, and I'm certainly not supposed to be sleeping with you."

"_Me_?" I gasped, angry. "What about _you_?" I demanded.

"I did what you wanted me to." I noticed he was no longer angry, but cold and icy, as when I'd first met him.

His words shocked and hurt me. I felt the burning in my throat and eyes. How dare he discount the love I was so willing to offer him? I angrily brushed the forthcoming tears from my eyes.

"Fine. _Fine_, Seto Kaiba. Have it your way then. I suppose you liked it better before last night. We'll go back to that. I'm not marrying you because I love you—I'm marrying you because I have to. And you're not marrying me because you love me, or because you finally found someone to fill the great void in your life," I choked on my own tears. I hadn't realized I was crying. "You're marrying me because you want my company. Well take it, Seto Kaiba. _Have it_. Millennium Corp. is all yours. Oh, and look," I sobbed, "you get a free…" I remembered what he'd said about the gossip, "_slut_ in the bargain."

I saw the change in his face but didn't care. I turned away from him but didn't know where to go.

"Wait," Kaiba said, faintly, touching my shoulder.

"Get away from me!" I shrieked, swiveling around to face him. I slapped him across the face. He released my arm, and I fled.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Believe it or not, as much of a jerk I think Kaiba is, this chapter was pretty hard to write. It took me forever to find the "perfect" mix of words to describe what happened and why they're exploding (emotionally) at each other. However, when I started writing this part of the story, it didn't surprise me that I had Kaiba "breaking off" the relationship—it's something I think Kaiba would do. (Yell at me if you think I'm wrong, but that probably won't change the story much.)

The Mokuba thing… was that as out of character as I think it is? Probably, but in my defense Kaiba's going through some pretty foreign emotions and situations, so I would expect something to snap in him at some point. You know, emotional confusion and stuff.

So anyway, if you have any massive problems with the way the breakdown went (the breakdown of the relationship stays, because otherwise I have to rewrite the next five chapters and I'm not interested in doing that), please leave a review so I can make any appropriate adjustments. Thanks!


	27. The Wrong Story

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Gomen! This chapter is pretty short… -sigh- Next chapter will be posted probably on Monday, since this one is so short.

sniffle sniffle- Damn Santa Ana winds are irritating my allergies… I am officially miserable. And my nose is running. Great. Just spiffing.

A little depressed because I pretty much a) Don't have anybody reading my Kenshin fic and b) managed to scare away one of the 2 readers I knew about because I added shounen-ai. Grrr. But this fic is still rolling (although it gets much darker 'round Chapter 35).

Replied to reviews by **yugikid**, **blue-eyes**, and **Raiyne Nagakura** on my LJ.

Chapter 26: The Wrong Story

There was no place for me to go. I could run and run and run but I still had no place to run to.

I ran up and down streets, through parks and parking lots. It was, of course, raining. Just like a story, I thought to myself. Only in the stories, the man comes running after the woman and stops her, underneath a streetlight, and they kiss with the rain coming down on them.

Kaiba certainly wasn't running after me.

* * *

At last I found myself at the only safe place I knew. The door was shut and the sign said "Closed," but I saw the light on upstairs in Yugi's room. Still crying, I knocked on the door. I stood for several minutes knocking before Yugi heard and came down. His eyes grew wide at seeing me. 

"Oh," he whispered. "Are you all right?" he asked me gently, guiding me into the warm front room. I nodded perfunctorily. He didn't believe me; I didn't expect him to. He led me into the warm kitchen.

"Here," Yugi said, handing me a mug. "Drink that…" He was rummaging through a cabinet. "Dry yourself with these…" He handed me some towels. "And then sit here and warm yourself. Here's a blanket." I was grateful that he didn't ask questions and didn't need to know what had happened.

"Yami says he wants to talk to you. Is that all right?"

I nodded, tears flowing afresh. Yugi frowned, and hugged me. "It'll be all right," he whispered into my ear. I nodded and kept crying.

* * *

Yugi switched with Yami, and he came over and knelt beside me. 

"What's happened?" he asked anxiously, taking a towel from my hands and struggling to dry my hair.

"Oh!" I wailed sadly. "What have I done, Yami? Where did I go wrong?" Sobbing, I explained to him what had passed between Kaiba and me. He frowned unhappily. When I was finished, he wrapped me in his arms gently and rocked me back and forth.

"Don't cry," he whispered softly. "Everything will work out."

"Don't make me go back," I whimpered. "Please don't make me go back there. I can't… I can't live with him anymore. I can't sleep in the same bed and share the same room. Not now. Not after everything he said… and didn't say." I knew what I'd wanted him to say: that he could deal with whatever had happened at the meeting, with whatever people were saying about us, because he loved me.

Yami nodded and comforted me. "Don't worry, my dove, you can stay in Yugi's room. Grandfather's not here this weekend, so no one will know."

"Thank you," I whispered. "I love you so much…"

He sighed sadly. "As I love you. But you still love Kaiba. And sooner or later we'll have to deal with that problem. Tomorrow," he said quickly, seeing the pain in my eyes.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Awww, aren't Yami and Yugi sweet? (Not _together_, you yaoi fangirls!) 

This was kind of just a transition chapter… the next chapter is more substantive and better overall, but I wanted the whole thing about the rain and the perfect romance story. I also wanted to bring Yugi, instead of Yami, back into the story (which I was only semi-successful at).

Other than that, this chapter was just to have her end up at the game shop and show what a good friend Yugi is.


	28. Answers

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Good day, everyone! I am in the midst of awaiting college decisions, so bear with me if I am cranky or overly excited. As promised, here is the quick update with Chapter 27.

Responded to reviews by **blue-eyes** (now **Kaiba plushie**) and **yugikid** on my LJ.

Also wondering where all of my old reviewers went… I miss you guys! Come back! Please!

Chapter 27: Answers

I lay on Yugi's bed, listening to the rain pattering on the window. So soft and gentle and even… Yugi lay on the floor with a pile of pillows and blankets. I smiled as I gazed upon him. He looked so young and innocent… I was surprised that he and Yami got along so well.

I rolled over to face the window, and watched the drops of water slide down the smooth glass. The watching tired my eyes, and I was ready to fall asleep when I heard Yami's voice.

"Looking for anything in particular?"

I didn't turn around to look at him. I could see his reflection in the window—he was a nearly transparent spirit leaning casually against Yugi's wall.

"Answers, I think."

"Mmmm," he murmured. "Anyplace in particular you'd like to look?"

"I almost want to try Channeling with Kaiba again. I wonder if he'd be open to me now."

"Perhaps. Why don't you try?"

I paused before answering. "I'm scared," I admitted finally.

He looked surprised. "Really? I didn't think you were scared of very much. Other than the future. You avoid thinking about the future like the plague."

My eyes widened. "How do you know?" I demanded.

He half-smiled. "When you Channel, it goes both ways. Anyone with enough power can read your memories or thoughts. I can't tap into your memories, but your thoughts I can. You've built a lot of walls, so only your immediate thoughts are available. Don't worry," he said, watching my narrowed eyes, "most of your secrets are still yours."

"Will I ever know which ones aren't?"

He shrugged. "If it makes any difference, I'll let you scan my mind to see what I know about you."

"You're even better at building walls than I am."

"Trust me. Everything I know about you is open right now." He closed his eyes, and waited for me.

Sighing, I probed his mind briefly. Satisfied that he was telling the truth, I withdrew. "So why are you afraid of Channeling with Kaiba?" he asked, his eyes still closed.

"I… I suppose… I don't know. Maybe I'm afraid of what I'll find."

His eyes opened sharply, then half-closed again. They became veiled and unreadable. "I don't know why or how you unlock our memories, or how you're connected to me and Kaiba, but you are. You're very important, somehow, to the whole thing. I don't even know how ancient your power is, or where you derive it from, or even how ancient you are.

"But I won't ask. Instead, I'll tell you that the memories Kaiba holds are not to be feared. Destiny is not to be feared. It is to be embraced. If you know your Destiny, you know that nothing until your Destiny can touch you."

I was silent. His eyes opened somewhat, and locked on me.

"I… I don't think so," I said slowly. I'd spent five thousand years thinking about Destiny. But was this what I had expected? Or what I'd wanted? "Destiny… Perhaps we all have an ultimate Destiny, and that indeed nothing can touch us until that Destiny is fulfilled. But I think… I think that we all have the power to write our own Destinies. That we can change what is set forth for us. Or at least, that's what I'd like to hope."

Yami was silent. "You're saying you hope Destiny is not final?"

"Yes," I said firmly. "I've known my Destiny for… a long time. I hope that I will not face that Destiny. Or that if I do, I do it on my own terms, not the terms someone else has written for me. I will not go like that. That will not be the purpose of my life."

He gazed at me, then nodded. "I think," he said slowly, "that you will write your own Destiny. You have the strength and the power to do it—to change the road before you to suit your desires. But I also know that Destiny is a hard power to fight. You may very well die trying to change Destiny."

"Better to die my own way than live someone else's."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Remember how I said last chapter that this one was better? Okay, yeah, it's better, but I still think there's something just slightly out of whack with it…

This chapter was meant to try to develop the main character's character (lol, that sounds funny) as well as the relationship between Yami and her. I also wanted to pull in more of Yami being philosophical and talking a lot, since that's what he seems to do in the anime.


	29. Friends

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Life is good here. No matter what happens now, even if UC Berkeley, Amherst, Stanford, Claremont McKenna, and Harvard all say no, I am going to a top college. I feel justified… I seriously considered sending excerpts from this fic to Pomona and Harvard as part of my supplementary materials, but decided against it because they probably wouldn't know what to think of me. I would be either "well-rounded" or just plain "weird."

Meant to post this Saturday but totally forgot, due to massive amount of time my mother took on the computer making airplane reservations for my trip to Dartmouth. (Sorry, can you tell I'm happy about all this college acceptance crap?)

Responded to review by **kaiba plushie** on my LJ.

Chapter 28: Friends

The next morning I was awakened by the smell of burning bacon and loud noises downstairs. Someone was shouting, and pans were banging madly. Grimacing, I stumbled into the bathroom and freshened up. I had no other clothes to wear, so I straightened my clothes and headed downstairs.

I found chaos in the tiny kitchen. Joey and Yugi were struggling to cook a decent breakfast. They fell over each other, broke eggs, burned more bacon, and dropped pans left and right. I watched, both bemused and amused, until Tea came up behind me.

"Enjoying the show?" she asked, handing me a bag.

I laughed and took the bag. "What's this?"

"Clothes. My clothes. Hopefully they'll fit you."

"Thanks," I said slowly. I looked up and smiled. "Thank you so much, Tea."

She blushed. "Don't worry about it. Just get changed."

Once I was showered and changed I joined the three downstairs for breakfast. Tea had intervened and saved some bacon, eggs, and orange juice from complete destruction. We ate amidst comfortable chatter. I was glad no one questioned my presence, or asked when I intended to return to the Kaiba mansion. I wasn't yet ready to face that problem.

* * *

I spent the next three weeks with my friends. When Yugi's grandfather returned, I moved to Joey's. When Serenity came back from camp I stayed at Tristan's. After three days at Tristan's I went to Tea's. I stayed with Tea for nearly a week. After Tea's I found myself at Duke's. I spent the remainder of the three weeks with Mai.

I didn't mind moving around so much. In fact, I was glad I didn't stay too long in any one place. I didn't like the thought of the uncomfortable questions that would inevitably follow. The more, and the faster, I moved, the better it was for me.

During my three weeks away, I heard nothing from Kaiba or Kaiba Corp. Nasty rumors spread in the tabloids, of course, but since few people had seen us—and even fewer actually knew who I was—I was never incriminated.

I vaguely wondered if the wedding had been called off. Every time I thought about it, I felt unidentifiable pain. There were times I nearly forgot how much he had hurt me, and thought only of how much I was hurting him. He had wanted this so badly… But then I would hear beautiful women snickering and gossiping about me, and my guilt was gone. He hadn't even apologized to me.

* * *

A week before the wedding was supposed to be, I was unpacking my (or rather, Tea's) things at Mai's when the phone rang. The caller ID said it was Yugi. I picked up the phone.

"Kaiba wanted me to tell you something," he said. "He said that the rehearsal and dinner are planned for next Thursday night. If you don't want to marry him anymore, you don't need to go."

"Thank you, Yugi," I said slowly. I'd known the wedding was coming up, but so soon?

There was a pause on the other end. "Yami says that you need to decide. He says that you can talk to him whenever you need to." I could sense Yugi's bewilderment, and didn't blame him. Yami and I communicated—and existed—on an entirely different level as Yugi and I.

"Tell him that I will. Thank you." There was a gentle click.

* * *

I stood there, with the phone in my hand, for several minutes. Mai returned and came over, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"You okay, honey?" she asked, eyes filled with concern.

I nodded mutely. "Well okay," she said doubtfully. "I'm making dinner, and Joey's coming over in about an hour."

I smiled, breaking out of my dazed state. "Oh good. I'll go over to Tea's for dinner then…"

"What!" Mai screamed. "No, you can't! It…"

"Should be a romantic dinner with just the two of you," I teased. "Here, I'll help you get ready. Don't worry about me. I need to talk to Yugi anyway, so I guess I'll go over there instead."

As I rummaged through her cabinets looking for candles and holders, Mai asked me suddenly, "Are you still marrying Kaiba?"

I froze uncomfortably for a second, then continued pulling tiny white tealights out of a bag. I shrugged. "I don't know. I need some time to think about it. I've been putting it off for the past two weeks. The wedding is next week. I have until Thursday to decide."

She nodded silently. "Okay. Well, I just thought I should tell you… we were talking about it, and we… we really care about you. We'll take care of you if you decide not to go through with the marriage. We understand. Yugi told us everything about it. None of us will think less of you if you do or don't marry Kaiba."

"Thank you," I whispered. I stood, cradling the tiny votive holders and tealights in my arms. We set up candles in silence. I felt like I should repay Mai, somehow… "Joey… Joey really does care about you, Mai," I said suddenly, breaking the silence.

Mai looked startled, but not completely surprised. "Really?"

"Yes. I… I can't tell if it's love yet, but he definitely cares for you."

Mai was silent. "I didn't think…"

"Joey can see past your tough-girl façade. He can see the lonely person inside. Just let him see it. And let him know how you feel too. If you do that, you'll be much happier, Mai. I know Joey sometimes seems immature, but I think that's only because he doesn't hide his feelings. Or he's not very good at it. He has a good, honest heart, Mai, and a big one at that."

She sighed and gave me a resigned smile. "Kaiba was a fool to say those things to you. You are the most perceptive person I've ever met, and the man who marries you is the luckiest man in the world."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Aren't they such awesome friends?

The opening scene was really just to lighten the mood, and develop the friendship (since I think I neglected it quite a bit).

Really tried to develop the relationship between the main character and the Yami gang (as I affectionately call them). I also tried to add a little depth to the whole Mai/Joey thing, since I think it's one of the sweetest pairings (yeah, there's _some_ evidence to point to Joey/Kaiba, but come on—a) Kaiba's obviously straight in my fic, and b) I think the 'evidence' is a result of Kaiba being a jerk) in the anime and one that nobody pays too much attention to (silly yaoi fangirls…although I _do_ like the occasional Jou/Kaiba fic )

Um what else… oh yeah, wanted to create tension with the whole Kaiba thing. Most of you can probably guess what she decides, but I just thought I'd throw all the other stuff in to add to fuel to the fire.


	30. Decisions

REVISED AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I meant to post this yesterday, but 1) was down when I tried to login to post and 2) I ended up in the hospital last night and just got back.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: In celebration of the beginning of my Spring Break, the shopping for of my prom dress, and all the college acceptance letters I have received (plus 1 waitlisting and 1 rejection… and I haven't heard from Stanford yet…) I give you a (gomen!) very short Chapter 29.

The BIG stuff is coming soon, have no fear.

Responded to reviews by **kaiba plushie** and **Raiyne Nagakura** on my LJ.

Chapter 29: Decisions

Wednesday night Mai held a big dinner at her apartment. Everyone was invited. I had asked her to do it. I wanted to ask them all to help me, to go with me the next night.

The table wasn't big enough for all eight of us, so instead we settled ourselves in her miniature living room. I smiled to myself when I saw Joey and Mai sit down together on the loveseat. Everyone thought Mai too proud to let Joey into her life. Maybe things would work out for the two of them after all.

As we were wrapping up dessert, I stood uncertainly and cleared my throat. Everyone fell silent and watched me.

"I… I wanted to thank you all, for being so wonderful and so patient the last three weeks… I just wanted to ask you… ask you all… if you would go with me to the church tomorrow night."

There was a moment of silence. "Of course," Yugi said quietly. "Of course we'll go with you."

Everyone nodded their assent. "Thank you. I just… I can't do it by myself. I can't face…" I fell silent. I didn't know how to continue.

"Don't worry. We'll be there for you," Tristan reassured me.

I nodded silently. I sat down beside Yugi, and he saw that I was crying.

* * *

The next night Mai and I left her apartment, picked up Joey and Serenity, and went to the church. We met Duke, Tristan, Tea, and Yugi in the parking lot. With a deep breath, I turned and pushed the heavy wood door open.

Kaiba and Mokuba were sitting silently in the first row of pews. Mokuba turned when the door opened, but Kaiba did not. Anger flared briefly in my breast. He knew. He was waiting for me to come running back to him. I almost stopped and went back out to the car, but restrained myself.

Coolly, I walked down the aisle, my friends following in my wake. When I reached the front of the church I saw the rector who would be performing the service come out of a side room. My friends sat down in the pew behind the Kaiba brothers. I stood before the rector, waiting for Kaiba to join me.

* * *

After the rehearsal there was a dinner for the wedding party, which no one seemed to enjoy. Unlike the last dinner we'd had together, this one was stiff and silent. We ate minimally and spoke even less.

When the end of the dinner arrived I knew I had to go back with Kaiba. He stood, waiting for me, as I hurried back to my friends.

"Eight o'clock Saturday morning," I whispered to my bridesmaids. "Come help me get ready."

They nodded. "Good luck," Mai murmured, hugging me.

Serenity and Tea both hugged me in turn. "I can't believe you've been so strong…" Serenity said to me as she pulled away.

Each of the guys gave me a friendly hug, reaffirming their promises to support me. Yugi was last. As he hugged me he whispered in my ear, "Yami wants to talk to you tonight." I nodded, and he let go. I watched them file silently out of the church, then turned back toward Kaiba.

I said nothing to him as I strode past him out the door. I stood anxiously beside the front door of the car as he unlocked it. The ride back to the mansion was silent and cold.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: What can I say? They're FINALLY getting married.

See, you knew what she would decide. But now that she has… I, the evil authoress, enter the picture… You know I can't just let that happen, right?

Did you expect any other reaction from Kaiba? I wasn't sure if it was _too_ cold or just cold enough or what, but I didn't expect Kaiba to get all romantic and sentimental now (especially in front of the Yugi gang, could you imagine that? But trust me, it happens… eventually).

Next chapter (when Yami talks to main character) is EXTREMELY short, but is very important for 2 reasons. One is, inevitably, the brief amount of thinking that goes on. The second is that it's the gateway to one of the turning points of the story as far as the characters go, as well as the gateway to long chapters.


	31. Wandering Spirits

AUTHOR'S NOTE: WAH! So short! Gomen gomen gomen! -runs into corner and hides- Please don't hurt me! They get longer after this, I promise!

I've noticed that most people give a disclaimer at the beginning of their fics. WHY? We all know you don't own it… so why tell us again and make yourself feel bad? (You guys DO know I don't own YGO, right? Right!)

Replied to reviews by **Raiyne Nagakura**, **kaiba plushie**, and **"Angel"** on my LJ.

Chapter 30: Wandering Spirits

Though I slept in Kaiba's bed that night, we each stayed on our own sides, refusing to even get close to each other. We said nothing to each other, each of us silently moving in our own worlds.

When I heard Kaiba's breathing become slow and even, I closed my eyes and Channeled with Yugi.

"Yugi said you wanted to see me," I told Yami when I opened my eyes.

He nodded. "I wanted to make sure you were all right."

"Yes. I'm fine."

He stared at me, hard. "Very well. Yugi and his friends will always be there for you."

I nodded, feeling the lump form in my throat. "I know."

"Serenity's right, you know. You've been very strong throughout this whole ordeal."

I shrugged. "I've learned how."

He glanced at me quizzically, but said nothing. Finally, he came over and held me against him. I began to cry.

"You marrying Kaiba…doesn't change anything between us," he whispered. "I still love you, more than I think I have ever loved before. The reasons you have decided to marry Kaiba… are what make me love you."

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Don't worry," he murmured. He knew what I was talking about. "We could never have been together even if you weren't marrying Kaiba. I'm just a wandering spirit, a five thousand year old spirit. I don't even know how old I am."

"Twenty-two," I said suddenly. I didn't know how I knew… I knew I hadn't seen it in a memory… Yami assumed that was how I knew and continued, "Without Yugi I wouldn't even have a body."

"Indeed…" I murmured, hardly listening. I too, was a wandering spirit, wasn't I? I hadn't been wandering because I was bodiless—I was wandering because my future was dictated by my past, and I remembered nothing of my past. I had spent five thousand years wandering, waiting for the Pharaoh and the High Priest to return. I wasn't even deriving my past from myself—I needed the other two in order to even know who I was. Why was that? What had I done that made me forget everything, made me dependent upon these two warring spirits?

My eyes narrowed suddenly. There was something cloudy forming over Yami's shoulder, something slowly clearing and revealing itself…

I was thrust into the memory without warning.


	32. Memories of Love

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The long chapters have begun! Muahahahaha!

Seriously, this is long for this story. And the three chapters I have after this are at least this long. So don't worry. There should be plenty of LP goodness to go around for a while.

Updates might be about every week and a half now, since I haven't written too much past this chapter.

Oh, by the way, **the rating on the story is now R**. This is just an extra precaution on my part, don't think that anything in this chapter is explicit or bad or anything. It's just a safety precaution. I think we can all agree, though, that this is not something 13 year olds should be reading… So that's why PG13 wasn't working for me anymore.

I have returned from the much foreign land of Pomona. It was fun. Details on my LiveJournal (the link is in my profile). But my Spring Break is now over. Damn.

Responded to reviews by **raquel**, **yugikid**, **"Angel"**, and **kaiba plushie**. Will also respond to reviews by **Raiyne Nagakura** and **Kaiba/Joey/Bakura fan** tonight or tomorrow.

Chapter 31: Memories of Love

_I stood beside the High Priest outside the Temple. We were waiting for something…_

_The chair the Pharaoh had sent to meet us arrived. We walked regally down the steps together, and the High Priest held out his arm and helped me up._

_We rode through the Kingdom, in the direction of the Pharaoh's city. The High Priest… the High Priest had an audience with the Pharaoh, that was it. And also with the other high ranking Temple officials. They'd all been invited by the Pharaoh._

_When we arrived we were helped down by guards and led through the Palace. The Pharaoh himself met us in the Great Hall._

_"Welcome, Priestess of Priests," he said to me, bowing low. "We have prepared rooms especially for you, and I myself will escort you to them." I nodded, inclining my head slightly. "And you, High Priest," he said, turning to him. "The others of the Temples are waiting for you. There are guards to escort you there."_

_As the Pharaoh led me away, I walked silently beside him. We said nothing to each other, not even touching, until we stopped before my chambers._

_"Here you are, Priestess," he murmured, drawing aside the curtain. "Please, tell me if there is anything you need." He turned to go._

_"Wait," I said suddenly, pulling on his sleeve. "Come inside," I continued, drawing him into the room._

_He stood, silently, before me. His eyes were veiled and cold. "Yes, my Priestess?"_

_I nearly cried. "Why?" I whispered. "Why are you acting like this? As if… nothing had ever happened?"_

_His eyes narrowed. "Would it be appropriate for us to be seen together? You are, after all, the High Priest's consort."_

_"Sleeping with the High Priest hasn't changed the way I feel about you!" I cried._

_"Why didn't you tell me you were expected to be chosen?" he hissed._

_"I thought… I thought I could spell myself so that they would not notice. I knew I would not be chosen as High Priestess… My power is too great, too baffling for the Priestesses to accept. They were afraid of me. I knew that if I were chosen at all it would be as the Priestess of Priests. And so I tried to protect myself against the priests…" The mention of the priests brought chills to my body. Why was I so afraid of them?_

_"I love you, Yami," I whispered softly. "Why can't you see that?"_

_He turned away from me. I went over to him, sat on his knee and wrapped my arms around him. Angrily, he pushed me away. I cried out as I staggered away from him._

_"We can't. Not anymore. I'm not… I'm not angry with you," he said slowly, seeing the hurt in my eyes. "I'm just… frustrated. I love you so much, but I couldn't do anything to keep you. I wanted you to be my Queen… to spend the rest of my life with you, to have you raise my children… and now I can't have that. I was powerless to stop it."_

_"But you're not powerless now," I whispered seductively, returning to his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him._

_He gasped, and at first refused me. I continued to kiss him, shifting my hips restlessly to let him know what I wanted. I felt his body change beneath me, become warmer and firmer and aroused. At last, he gently pried my lips apart with his tongue. I laughed softly, and pulled him against me. He kissed me hard, passionately, and it was as if I had never been given to the High Priest._

_As we kissed I shifted myself in his lap, straddling him and pressing myself against him. He cried out softly against my mouth, then thrust his hips against mine so I could feel him. I laughed, and reached one hand down to stroke him. He moaned and stood. Laughing, I wrapped my legs around his hips and locked my ankles together. He kissed me again and walked over to my bed, with me clinging to him. With a soft sigh he lay down on top of me._

_His lips caressed the skin on my neck as his hands gently removed my linen gown. I laughed against his lips as he kissed me while I removed his clothes, too. His hands moved to caress my breasts, then slid down my abdomen to my hips and thighs. I wrapped one arm around his neck, holding him to me, while the other roamed over his beautiful body. We were naked against each other, our bodies pressed together and moving in perfect harmony._

_I opened myself to him, and as he thrust himself into me he reached to close the curtain around my bed.

* * *

_

_When I woke up it was mid-evening, and the Pharaoh was gone. I smiled faintly and crawled out of bed. I found the tile-lined pool in the next room, and bathed. The warm water made me slightly drowsy, and when I was finished I slid back into my bed._

_But after only a few moments I found I was restless. The Pharaoh had awakened what I had hidden for so long. I was hungry, desirous. I could not go to the Pharaoh tonight. It would be very difficult to do without drawing unnecessary and unwanted attention._

_I tossed in my bed for nearly half an hour until I could stand it no longer. I slipped out of bed and past the heavy curtain in my doorway, prepared to go to the Pharaoh's rooms. I knew them and how to get there well enough. As I tiptoed down the hallway I paused before the room next to mine. Light was peeking out from beneath the curtain, and I wondered who it was._

_Slowly, I pulled back the curtain just enough to see inside. The light came from a small glowing orb hanging in mid-air. It illuminated a large, beautiful wood desk. Sprawled across it were papers, inks, brushes, charcoal. They had the look of having been used extensively, then laid aside hastily. I smiled faintly. There was only one person this room could belong to._

_He was lying on his own bed, tangled in the fine linen sheets. His clothes, worn and dirty from traveling and meetings all day, lay in a neat heap on the floor. His breathing was even and light, indicating to me that he was sleeping fairly soundly._

_Some motherly instinct awoke in me, and I pushed the curtain all the way aside. I used my own power to dim the orb of light, then carefully straightened the papers on the desk. He was quite particular about his work, and would have been upset if anything were out of place. I took his dirty clothes and spread them out to air until a maid came to take them away for washing. I knew he often got cold when sleeping, so I reached beneath the bed for the extra blanket I knew was there. With a little sigh, I began untangling his body from the sheets. When I had finally done so, and had tucked him in beneath the other blanket, I turned to go._

_Only when I looked upon him did it occur to me to stay. He looked so angelic in sleep. His icy, hard eyes were closed and relaxed, his sharp cheekbones dulled by dreams. Every line in his face had softened to the point where he looked sweet and kind. I smiled, stroking his hair away from his face. Gently, I pushed back the covers until I had revealed his perfectly carved, naked body. I gazed upon him for a few moments, then, with hardly a thought, climbed on top of him and kissed him._

_He woke, eyes wide and body fighting me. I only kissed him harder, driving my tongue deep into his mouth. When at last he saw that it was me, his eyes grew even wider. I laughed against his mouth, teasing him. I could feel him beneath me, as I had felt the Pharaoh earlier, growing hot and hard and hungry. I shifted my hips back and forth just slightly, and he gave a soft cry._

_He must have sensed that I was in control this time, and, to my surprise, he let it stay that way. He kissed me, hard, one last time, then fell away from me so that he lay flat against the bed. I smirked down at him, running my fingers over his chest and down his breastbone. A shudder ran through his body, and he moaned. He was anxious, ready, waiting, but I was not. I wanted to tease him longer, make him wait for me, make him truly desire me. When I leaned over and began to gently nibble the skin on his neck, he whimpered softly, moving his hips, pleading with me. I shook my head and continued._

_After what felt like minutes rather than seconds I sat up again. He was lying breathless and helpless beneath me. At last, I straddled his hips and guided him into me. He moaned, breathing heavily. With a little gasp I began moving. I watched every muscle of his groin, stomach, and chest tighten as he arched his back and thrust his hips upward. Laughing, I dropped my weight heavily to keep him down. His hands gripped my thighs, painfully real._

_It was only moments before it was over and he was satisfied. I rolled off him and snuggled against him, practically purring in happiness. He lay beside me, breathless, for a few moments, then he rolled towards me and drew me against him. Laying my head against his chest, I was lulled to sleep by his gentle, even heartbeat.

* * *

_

_I woke up the next morning snuggled against him, arms around his waist. His legs were wrapped around mine, and his arms surrounded me protectively. I smiled to myself as I stirred restlessly. He woke slowly, one eye opening at a time. He stretched his long limbs out before collapsing back on the bed. I lay on my side to look down at him._

_He smiled up at me, something very few people had ever seen. "You're so beautiful," he whispered, awestruck. His hand reached up to trace the line of my jaw and brush against my hair._

_I smiled and leaned down, kissing him gently on the cheek. I saw the disappointment in his eyes as I sat back up, and I smirked ever so slightly to let him know I was playing. He put a pained look on his face and practically whimpered, "Is that all I get?"_

_I smiled playfully, then leaned down as if to kiss him. "Of course not, my dragon," I murmured sweetly. Instead of kissing him though, I placed my hands on the back of his head and pressed him against my breasts. Like a child, he cried out when he did not get what he wanted, but was quickly quieted when he discovered what I was offering him instead._

_Hungrily, he kissed and caressed my breasts with his lips and tongue. When he was satisfied with that, he raised himself so that we were facing each other and kissed me. I kissed him back and fell onto the bed._

_"I love you," he whispered gently in my ear. He paused briefly. "I just want to know… if you…"_

_"I love you, if that's what you're wondering. Do you think I'd be here if I didn't?" Under Temple law, I had every right as a priestess to refuse him. I was required to sleep with him for religious purposes and ceremonies, but otherwise I was only his symbolic partner. I was free to give myself to any man I wished. However, in practice, most priestesses would not do such._

_We lay there, quietly, for many minutes until there was a soft pounding at the curtain. Sighing, he drew up the blankets and covered me with them, so that no one could see me, then called out to whoever stood at the door._

_"My Lord High Priest, the priests await your presence in the Great Hall. If you are busy, or disinclined, they say that they will wait," a servant murmured._

_"Thank you. Tell them I'll be down shortly."_

_He sighed and pulled himself out of bed. I peeked out from beneath the blankets to watch him dress. "When will you be back?" I asked._

_"Later. I don't know. These meetings are abominably long and dry. No offense to any gods, of course, only to the men who like to hear themselves speak."_

_"Very well then. I'll wait for you."_

_He hurried to kiss me before he left. "I would be honored to find you still here when I return, my lady dragon."

* * *

_

_I smiled and pulled the blankets up over my breasts, settling back into the pillows. I'd drawn the window curtains aside to let in light, content to lie in the empty room and wait._

_I basked contentedly in the sunshine for hours, alternately dozing and daydreaming. By mid-afternoon, I was impatient. I was ready to crawl out of bed, dress, and go to the Pharaoh's library to read when I heard the door curtain move._

_Quickly, I ducked back down beneath the covers, revealing just enough of myself to tempt him when he came in. I closed my eyes and feigned sleep, ears straining to hear his gentle footsteps approaching._

_He stopped beside the bed, pausing momentarily. I kept my breathing still and even. A hand reached beneath the sheets to caress my thigh. I smiled inwardly. His other hand reached for my barely visible breast. He leaned over slightly, and I turned to look at him._

_My eyes widened. No. Wrong. All wrong. Where was my dragon? This man… I knew…_

_"Good afternoon, Priestess," he snickered, hands still hungrily fondling my body._

_"Get away from me!" I cried. "You have no right… " I faltered as he released my thigh and clamped a hand over my mouth._

_"No, I don't. But the gods are a different story."_

_"What are you talking about?" I cried into his hand. The gods spoke only to the priestesses… only rarely did they speak to priests, and then only the High Priest._

_"The god of truth came to me last night… He told me you'd betrayed the High Priest—with the Pharaoh, no less—and should be duly punished."_

_My eyes widened. He was insane. Absolutely insane. Under Temple law, the High Priest had no claim to me. I had claim to him; I was the only woman he could have. But I was free to choose lovers as I liked._

_I bit his palm, hard, and he lifted his hand with a cry. "The Temple laws…" I gasped._

_"Were written by filthy whores like yourself!" he shrieked, slapping me across the face._

_I screamed, to no avail. He pressed down harder on my mouth. I kicked and thrashed, succeeding only in tangling myself in the blankets. Tears formed in the corners of my eyes as he straddled me, laughing._

Where are you_, my mind called pitifully, plaintively, begging for help. But no one came…_

_He leered at me, then forced my legs apart and shoved himself into me._


	33. Awakening

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ugh. Sorry it took me so long to update. I was gone for a while visiting colleges, and now things have just piled up to the point where I want to scream and go to UC Riverside. I have 6 days to pick a college. I am so screwed.

**I am going on hiatus for a few weeks. **Yes, that is correct m'dears. This week, next week, and the week after (and probably even the week after that) are completely packed with me being my busy self. So while I might keep writing to keep myself sane, I probably will not be posting new chapters during the next 3-4 weeks. It's not that I don't love you, it's just that APs and being a senior have finally caught up with me.

Responded to reviews by **yugikid**, **Raiyne Nagakura**, **KitsuneShingestuBara**, **Raquel**, **"Angel"**, and **Gardevoir-Mages** on my LJ (which, again, you can access via my profile).

Chapter 32: Awakening

My eyes snapped open and my body jerked violently. A cold sweat covered my body.

_What the _hell_ just happened?_ I thought, feeling slightly faint.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to sort out my thoughts. I could care less about the priestess sleeping with Yami and the High Priest, although it had been fairly pleasurable as far as memories went. Clearly, the priestess did care about both men, so any hypotheses about her being a little conniving vixen were wrong. But the last memory…

That man… that priest… I _knew_ him. I'd seen him before, somewhere, someplace…

I shivered. And how had I ended up in memories that didn't even involve Yami? Wasn't that how this memory had started?

At that thought, I finally looked up to take in my surroundings. _Damn_, I thought. I was in a hospital. With a sigh, I sat fully upright slowly, careful not to disturb any of the equipment. I looked around the room. No one was inside with me. Carefully, I climbed off the bed and stood weakly beside it.

How long had I been out?

As I shuffled to the door to let myself out, it opened in towards me as a guest arrived.

"You're up!" Yugi cried brightly. Tea poked her head in behind him and heaved a sigh of relief.

"What's going on?" I asked, still somewhat groggy. I needed to get home… to ask her about the memories and how I was able to cross into the High Priest's or the priestess' memories when they weren't even present.

"You've been out for nearly three days," Tea supplied. I groaned.

"We knew you were okay, because Yami said you were." I smiled at Yugi's complete trust in the Pharaoh.

"Yami knew?"

"He said something…about your spirit entering another place and time." Yugi gave a little shrug. "He said not to worry about you, that's all."

"So I'm here because…?"

"Kaiba," Tea and Yugi answered in unison.

I sighed. "Why am I not surprised? Where is he?"

"He's at work, I think," Yugi said with a slight frown of concentration.

"Good," I said brightly. "So he can't stop me from leaving." I reached to go beyond them into the hallway.

"What!" Tea cried. "You've been lying unconscious for nearly _three days_. You can't just leave now!"

"Tea," I said slowly, gripping her shoulders. "I'm fine. Really. I am. And there is something vitally important I need to find out."

Her eyes widened. "You're…different, aren't you?"

I sighed in resignation. Why here, and why now? I had more pressing matters on my hands… "Define different."

"Well, I…Like… Yami…"

"Tea, maybe we should just…"

"Look, I'll explain later, I promise. I just… there's something I need to figure out. Oh _shit!_" I screamed, smacking my forehead as realization dawned on me. "I missed the wedding, didn't I?"

Yugi and Tea fidgeted nervously, not meeting my gaze. "Yes?" Tea ventured in a whisper.

"Well, not really… you really didn't miss anything, since there was no…"

Groaning, I sat back down on the hospital bed. "Oh, gods. I can't believe this is happening to me."

After a few moments of silence, Tea spoke up. "Look, I think you should go… and take care of whatever it is that needs to be taken care of. Don't worry about the wedding or anything else… Kaiba didn't say anything about the wedding."

"He was really worried about you, you know," Yugi pointedly informed me.

I gave what sounded very much like a snort. How unladylike. Certainly not befitting of a Kaiba. "Oh really? Why? I'll bet it looked _awful_ to all the corporate bigwigs to have me passed out in a hospital bed."

"No… We knew when he called to tell us what had happened… He was scared. He was scared enough to call _us_; that must mean something. I've never heard such fear in his voice… It was like something had happened to Mokuba."

I frowned. That wasn't the Kaiba that had tossed me away, then coolly waited for me to coming running back like a whipped puppy.

"And when you were in here, not responding to anything… he was out in the lobby, just sitting. Staring at his hands, the wall… He wasn't doing anything. He didn't sleep, and he barely ate. They wouldn't let any of us stay with you, since none of us are related to you, so he just… sat. And waited."

"He went back to work just today," Tea added. "He said there were people he had to talk to. He came in here right before that, talked to you, I guess."

I examined a spot on the floor between my bare feet. I didn't know what to say. Why couldn't I see that side of Kaiba all the time? Why was it that I had to be out cold and beyond reach for him to care about me?

Then again, maybe he didn't even care about _me_, just his own ass.

"Thank you for telling me. I need to see someone, and then I'll have to talk to Kaiba myself. Go home."

Yugi and Tea nodded, then headed for the door. "Just tell the nurses you want to leave. You're nearly a Kaiba; they won't give you much trouble," Yugi advised.

* * *

As I closed my eyes for a last few moments of rest, I found myself unconsciously tapping into Yugi's mind. Instead of breaking the Channel, like I normally would have, I stuck around to listen to his conversation with Tea.

"Something's different, Yugi. Could you tell?"

"Yeah, Tea, I could feel it too."

"What do you think it was?"

"Well, she was acting differently… more like one of us than herself. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"I think so…"

"Plus… there was just something different about her when she woke up. She wasn't the same person."

"What did Yami say?"

"That's another thing I don't get either. How can she talk to Yami without talking to me?"

"He said something about her spirit, right?"

"Yeah. So…?"

"So maybe… she's a spirit too?"

"But Yami's a spirit inside my body, just like Bakura had a separate spirit that made him evil and this Marik guy. I don't think she has an extra spirit. It just seems to be her."

"But he did say that she was in a different time and place."

"And he said that she would be all right… as if it were natural for her to be there."

"I'm confused, Yugi. What does it mean?"

"Your guess is as good as mine."

* * *

I watched and listened to them go, then picked my clothes off a chair and changed out of the starchy hospital gown. I'd have to tell them—tell them all—eventually. Grimacing at the residual soreness in my body, I limped out into the hallway and down to the nurse's desk.

"Hi, I'd like to … um… well, leave now. If that's all right with you." Why couldn't I have had some real-life, hands-on experience as part of my "training"?

"Hmm… Well, none of us would advise it, but since you seem well enough, and competent, I suppose we can let you go." Feeling the slight warmth on my forehead, I wondered if the Crown wasn't smoothing things over for me. If it was, I thanked it profusely.

I smiled broadly at the young nurse, and thanked her. She pointed to the main door, and I hurried out. I rolled my shoulders as I walked down the block, wincing as each of them cracked. I'd never been in a memory that long. There was definitely something going on.

And I'd noticed it, too, like Yugi and Tea—I was acting much differently than I had been recently. Could it have been triggered by the memories? The 5000-year-old part of me thought it possible. The other part of me, the part that existed in this century alone, thought it was something else. The stress of all that had happened… wasn't it possible I was acting this way because I'd been hurt?

I laughed aloud, the sound hanging in the bright July air like bells. I had to stop psychoanalyzing myself. It was unhealthy. Besides, it wasn't going to help me answer the very pressing questions I had right now.

* * *

Unfamiliar, yet vaguely familiar, streets flew by me as I hurried home. The more I walked, the more my body forgot about my spirit's three-day vacation, and I began to feel slightly better.

I hurried up the steps to the always unlocked door and pushed it open into the kitchen. She was there, as I had expected. Without hesitating, as if I still belonged in this house and we were still on speaking terms, I sat down on a stool at the counter and watched her.

She knew me well. She placed a half-full glass of mango juice in front of me and waited patiently as I gulped it down.

"Why have you returned?" she asked simply, taking the glass away to wash it.

I shrugged. I didn't want her to know how badly I needed her. But then, I was a little scared of everything that had happened… "Okay, fine. I came back because I need you. Happy?"

She made no response. At last, she said, "You know that none of us are truly happy while you continue to wander."

I sighed heavily, choosing to ignore the reference to my ancient past. "Look, something happened that I don't understand, and it scares me." She drew up a stool across from me and sat down, her way of telling me that she was listening.

"I was Channeling, like usual, and I was talking to Yami—"

"The Pharaoh?"

"Yes—how did you know?"

"Future and past are one and the same to me. Go on."

"And all of a sudden, a memory opened to me…"

"Which you did not have to trigger?"

"No! That surprised me a little, too, since normally with Yami I need to open the doors in his mind. But then… the memory was _long_. Tea said I was out for nearly three days."

"A long time for spirit to be separated from body."

"Thank you; I think my body can tell that quite fine," I snapped. "And so can my spirit, for that matter. Why am I acting so weird?"

She gave a little half-shrug, and closed her eyes. "A reaction to the memory, I should think."

Grumbling beneath my breath, I continued. "The part I really wanted to ask you about, though, is that I was able to see memories Yami wasn't even in. How is that possible?"

"Is it not obvious?"

I glowered at her. "If you know so much about my powers, why don't you just tell me what they are so _I _understand them too?"

"Not all things are meant to be known now. Some things are for later. Some things are for never."

"Answer my question," I replied coldly.

It didn't phase her. "You've developed your power a great deal, with all your Channeling. If I had to guess—"

"And I'm assuming you're not."

"—then I would guess that you are now able to tap into other important memories, provided you have a way into the mind."

I could just envision the blank stare on my face. "What?"

"Whose memories were you in?" she asked more directly.

"Um… well, I guess it would be Yami's or the High Priest's. Or the priestess, I suppose."

She was silent for a moment. "Then _I_ would guess the High Priest. Would you have a way in?"

"I don't understand the way in… I thought he either had to have his Item or he had to trust me."

"Well, you know he doesn't have his Item. Has he reason to trust you?" she asked, turning her great, dark eyes on me. I flushed. She didn't really need to clarify.

"Yes, I suppose you could say that…"

"And were you near him when you Channeled with the Pharaoh?"

"Yes, he was sleeping next to me."

"Then you simply crossed over into the High Priest's memories."

"It's that simple?"

"Essentially, yes."

Suddenly, I remembered something. "What about…" I described the scene I had seen without the High Priest. A troubled look fell over her lovely features.

"You say neither was in this memory? Only the priestess?"

"Yes."

She sighed. "The memory is important; keep it safe. I imagine that you were shown it as the High Priest envisioned it happened."

My head was throbbing, trying to retain all the new information about my powers. I didn't question anything she said. I was thousands of years older than her, yet so much younger in knowledge of myself…

"Things have become complicated. There is much left for you to do before you can be set free."

I stood and walked to the window. "Who built this cage for me? Who caught me and clipped my wings, locked me away?" With some shock I realized I was speaking far more poetically than ever before. But the words were coming to me without thought, as if I knew them and had said them already.

"Only you know. You may need the Pharaoh and the High Priest and the priestess to find out, but only you can construct the story out of the pieces. Only you can break your cage, only you can test your wings."


	34. I'll Try

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I did screw over my hiatus. Sort of. I'm posting but I'm not writing. So basically, my stockpile of chapters is being decreased and not restocked as I speak. Did that make sense? I'm rambling, I can feel it. My brain is admittedly a bit fried after this week (and it's not like it's going to improve much…)

I also kind of guessed at Mokuba's age...

Responded to reviews by **kaiba plushie** and **yugikid** on my LJ.

Chapter 33: I'll Try

Now for the even harder part. Kaiba.

With a heavy sigh I hurried down the street. I was doing a lot of walking today—too much for my own good. Plus, this time I was walking in heels. I grimaced. I'd changed before leaving the house into something "respectable"—a neat gray skirt suit with a pale pink silk blouse and white heels. This was the first, last, and _only_ time I would care about what I wore, I vowed. My legs and ankles were going to hurt so much tonight.

Nearly half an hour later I was standing at the entrance to Kaiba Corp. The building was tall, and, if my memory was to be trusted, Kaiba's office was on the top floor. I pushed through the revolving glass doors. If the elevators were broken, Kaiba could forget marrying me. I wasn't _walking_ all that way.

Luckily for me (or Kaiba, as Mai would argue) the elevators were in tiptop shape. I stepped into one and pressed the button for the top floor. I drummed my fingers anxiously against the railing as I crawled up the floors. When the elevator dinged, I took a deep breath and stepped out.

The same secretary was still there, and she still didn't know who I was.

"Do you have an appointment, miss?" she asked.

"No, not in your book. I happen to have a very important appointment with Mr. Kaiba in my appointment book." I strode past her towards Kaiba's office door.

"Miss! Mr. Kaiba is in an important meeting with his Board of Directors!"

I spun on my white, two-inch heels and stared her down. "Does it look like I care?" I asked, clearly irritated.

She quavered ever so slightly, and my tone softened. I sighed. I hated being a bad guy. "I need to speak with Mr. Kaiba about something very urgent. I missed an extremely important meeting with him Saturday, and feel I must explain myself. I also think an introduction to the Board of Directors would be in order."

Neither of us needed to continue, because the door swung open—running over my foot. With a yelp I jumped backwards on one foot, the other held in my left hand as I caressed the newly forming bruise.

Kaiba was holding the door open for the other men, who were silently filing out.

"Oh, Mr. Kaiba!" the secretary cried. "She said she needed to see you…"

Kaiba looked decidedly uncomfortable as he saw me. "Well, gentlemen, you said you wanted to meet her…"

"Mr. Kaiba?" the secretary asked uncertainly.

"What is the meaning of this, Seto?"

These people were annoying. "Miss," I said, turning to the secretary. "I think your phone is ringing uncontrollably, and you should be getting back to it." She slipped away, affronted by my sarcasm. But at least now she knew I was important.

I put my foot down and tested it—it didn't hurt so much anymore that I couldn't stand on it. I limped to Kaiba and took his arm, leaning on him. Okay, so my foot still hurt.

Kaiba looked down at me, and I looked up at him sweetly. Oh, there was so much to talk about… He cleared his throat. "Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet my aforementioned fiancée."

I smiled sweetly at them, but didn't let go of Kaiba's arm or leave his side. I wasn't sure what they expected of me, and the last thing I needed was Kaiba's Board after me too. "Nice to meet you, sirs."

They looked me up and down, and I thanked every god that I had thought to change. I also prayed that I'd picked something good. Finally, the one that appeared to be their leader nodded.

"She'll do, I suppose. Go ahead and get married, Seto, but we'll talk about this afterward." I looked up at my fiancé, troubled. I'd never heard anyone boss him around. His response troubled me even more. His head was bowed, his eyes averted, and his shoulders slightly slumped. He nodded dumbly.

Something wasn't right here. I felt the sinister air settle around me, like a discomforting blanket. Oddly enough for today, I held my tongue. Anything I said here, I sensed, would come back to bite me with a vengeance—and rabies.

As soon as they had filed away into the elevators, I turned to look at Kaiba. An uncomfortable silence descended in place of evil, and we stood for a few seconds.

"Why don't you… come into my office…?" he suggested faintly, leading me inside.

We sat down at the desk in two chairs beside each other. I decided to start the conversation, but my boldness had fled. "I… I'm not sure how to explain what happened."

"Yugi told me you were all right."

"You trusted him?" I asked softly.

"I had no choice. I couldn't wake you… you responded to nothing. But Yugi seemed supremely confident that you were all right. So I trusted him, out of necessity."

I was silent. We sat uncomfortably, Kaiba with his hands folded on the arm of his chair, studying them. "So… Tea told me that the wedding was postponed?"

He nodded mutely. "Until you're better."

"I'm fine," I said quickly, placing one of my hands over his. "Really. Tell me when it can be arranged."

"It doesn't matter."

"Can we have it at the mansion? In the garden?"

He looked up at me, confused. "I like the garden," I explained. "It's… pretty," I finished lamely. "And I can't imagine inconveniencing the church anymore."

"That would be fine. When would you like to have it?"

"This weekend?"

"All right. This weekend it is." The uncomfortable silence. "Are you sure you want this?" he asked, barely audible.

"What?" I asked in response, confused.

"Are you sure you want to get married?"

I felt unintended anger rise in my chest. "Would I be asking you when we should get married if I didn't want to?"

"I just… I want to make sure this is really what you want. It would be such a big step for both of us…"

"You're just now realizing that?" I snapped, voice dripping with sarcasm, withdrawing my hand from his.

"It's just that…" he muttered, frustrated, running his hands through his hair.

"What?" I demanded.

"There are so many consequences that I hadn't anticipated. The Board of Directors was just one of them."

"Consequences for me? Or consequences for you and your career?"

He didn't answer me. I never thought that it might be hard for him to say what he felt—hard for him to admit that he loved me. I thought it would—and should—be easy to say such a thing.

I stood, angry. _Déjà vu_, I thought dismally, as the last time we'd fought replayed itself in my mind. "If you'd just tell me outright that your career and reputation is more important to you, you'd make things a lot easier. At least then I wouldn't expect you to actually love me." I shoved my chair away from the desk and stalked out of the room, not bothering to wait for his response.

* * *

I walked—yes, _walked_—all the way back to the Kaiba mansion. I was too angry to care that my feet were throbbing. At some point, when I did notice, I simply removed my shoes and carried them in my hand.

When I got there I slammed the door closed and hurried upstairs to the bedroom. I didn't know if Kaiba was home yet, but I hoped he wasn't. I opened the door to our—his—bedroom, glad that discover that he wasn't there yet.

Angrily, I stripped off my confining clothing and changed into a looser, softer nightgown. I yanked my hair out of its bun and let it flow down my back. I wiped the makeup from my face and splashed icy water over it. I drew the covers back from the bed and flung myself down onto it.

Before I knew it I was sobbing into the satin-covered pillows, tears leaving wet streaks on my cheeks and the sheets. I curled on my side and lay there, miserable and hurt.

I didn't realize I wasn't alone in the house until I felt somebody sit down on the bed. Half-hoping, half-dreading it was Kaiba, I quieted my crying until I was breathing normally again. I kept my head down and my hair curtained across it.

"Are you… all right?" a small voice asked.

I looked up, uncurling my body and brushing my hair away from my face. Mokuba. "What are you doing here?" I managed to ask weakly, the sobs still threatening to escape from my breast.

"Someone dropped me off here after school. A friend. Seto doesn't usually get home for another hour or so."

I sniffed in response, trying to keep the heaving in my chest under control. "Why are you crying?" he asked softly. "Did Seto say something?"

At that, I felt the tears leak out of my eyes and pour down my face. I was able to keep my breathing in check, but the tears would not be stopped. Well, at least I answered his question.

"He doesn't mean most of the things he says," Mokuba added quietly.

"That doesn't help," I mumbled into the sheets.

"Whatever he said to you, I don't think he meant it."

"He didn't say anything Mokuba, that's the problem."

"What do you mean?"

"I asked him a question… and I needed to hear an answer. I got nothing. Silence. That silence said more than any words he might have used to say the same thing."

Mokuba apparently understood, because he sat silently for a few moments.

"I want you to be my sister," he said quietly after a moment.

"I wouldn't mind being your sister," I admitted.

"But you don't want to marry Seto, do you?"

The million-dollar question. Deep down inside, I already knew the answer.

"No, Mokuba, I do… but that's why…" The words wouldn't form properly in my mouth, and I said nothing.

"He… loves you," Mokuba said slowly. The hesitation, though, made me wonder.

"Why do you hesitate?"

"Because he's never said it. I don't know if I've ever heard those words out of his mouth." Neither had I. But not even Mokuba had heard it?

"So how would you know what your brother's thinking?"

"I just do. I know how he acts. He acts… differently. I think he really wants you to love him."

"He's going to have to do an awful lot of changing—or explaining—before I can love him." This, also, was not true. I already loved Kaiba—that's why it hurt so much to know he didn't love me. I had already forgotten that Kaiba was the one who craved love—that Kaiba had arranged this marriage in hopes that I would love him.

"Well, then, I love you," Mokuba said simply. "Will you trust me, and marry Seto?"

I sighed heavily. "I don't have much of a choice, Mokuba. It doesn't matter what happens, I'm still going to marry your brother. Is that better?"

He frowned. "But I want you to be happy…"

"Happiness is a luxury, Mokuba. You deserve to be happy. Don't worry about me. I'll find my happiness eventually."

"Will you leave us to find it?"

Why did I bring up philosophical matters with a twelve-year old? "I don't think so," I answered, for simplicity's sake.

"Good," he said, firmly. He leaned over the expanse of bed and hugged me around the waist. Surprised, I looked down at the top of his dark hair. I smiled, and hugged him around the shoulders. He crawled across the bed and settled in my lap, as if he were seven instead of in the seventh grade.

"I love you," he repeated, with a little sniffle, and I realized he was crying.

"I love you too, Mokuba," I murmured, smoothing his hair in a most motherly way.

I didn't hear the door opening and closing downstairs, and if Mokuba did, he didn't say anything. We sat there for minutes, me rocking him gently back and forth and stroking his hair. I don't know quite why I did it. Maybe I sensed in him the desire and need for a mother, the loneliness he faced with only Seto for comfort.

* * *

Kaiba walked in on us like that, and stood silently in the doorway. Mokuba heard, because he stirred in my arms and sat up. I released him and let him dry his face on the sleeve of my nightgown.

"Mokuba," Seto said softly.

"It's okay, big brother. I'm going to bed. Good-night," he said to me as he wandered out the door past Seto.

"Sweet dreams," I called after him.

That same uncomfortable silence settled over us. Why couldn't Kaiba be more like Mokuba?

"Everything is planned. I called the important people. Saturday morning, in the garden," he said tritely, removing his coat and stepping into his closet to hang it up.

"Mmmm," I murmured in response. I lay down on my side of the bed and drew the covers over me, effectively ending the conversation. I lay there, silently, feigning sleep, as Kaiba went into the bathroom to shower. When he came out, he climbed into his side of the bed but did not lie down. I sensed his wakefulness, and knew that he was sitting in the dim light of his bedside lamp, staring into the darkness.

There was a soft creaking as the door to the bedroom opened, and I heard gentle footsteps padding across the floor. "Seto?" Mokuba asked softly.

"Mokuba," Seto said, surprised. "What are you doing up?"

"I'm worried, Seto."

"About what? School?"

"No. I'm worried about you. And onee-chan." I smiled at the term of endearment.

"Why?"

"She was crying, Seto. Because you're so silent."

"I don't understand, Mokuba. What do you mean?"

"She said… she wants to hear you say special words to her. Words that mean something."

"I still don't understand, Mokuba. If we're going to talk in circles, you should just go back to bed."

I could imagine Mokuba's dark eyes narrowing angrily, as I heard the sheets rustle impatiently.

"Do you love her, Seto?" Mokuba asked, very directly.

There was silence, and a strangled sound from Kaiba. "I… I…" the words were choked and painful.

"You do, don't you?" I frowned to myself. How was that possible? I wasn't even awake; Kaiba should have no problem saying the one simple word that would have made everything better.

Still no response from Kaiba. "I know you do. 'No' is too easy for you to say. If you didn't love her, you'd deny it. Why is 'yes' so hard for your voice to form?"

"Mokuba…" Kaiba managed.

"You know I'm right, big brother. And nee-chan needs you to learn how to say it. She won't be truly happy until you do."

Kaiba gave a little gasp. "She loves you, Seto, but she needs to know—know, Seto, not just suspect—that you love her, too."

"It's something… I've never had to deal with before," Kaiba murmured.

"Well, learn how," Mokuba retorted, at that instant clearly Kaiba's little brother. I heard him crawl off the bed and pad out of the room.

In the gentle silence that followed I felt Kaiba's weight shift on the bed. He turned and leaned towards me, then reached out tentatively and stroked my loose hair.

"I'll try," he whispered. "I'll try."


	35. Wedding Bells aka THE FLUFF CHAPTER!

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Found a gap in my busy schedule and decided to post something, even though it is primarily fluff that is irrelevant to pretty much anything in the plot of this story. I must admit, though, fluff is HARD to write. Or maybe just for me. But I'm such a fluffy person… anyway…

Responded to reviews by **yugikid** and **Angel** on my LJ and hope to reply to **Raiyne Nagakura**'s tonight.

Chapter 34: Wedding Bells (aka the FLUFF chapter)

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _THUNK.

I grimaced as I withdrew my hand from the alarm clock and slid it back underneath my pillow. I readjusted the comforter over my shoulders and prepared to go back to sleep. Kaiba, sleeping behind me, shifted a little and snuggled closer against me, sliding his arm around my waist.

We'd taken to being comfortable—and familiar—around each other since our first night back together. Though I never outright told Kaiba I'd heard his conversation with Mokuba, I think he suspected that I had. After that, we'd taken care of each other during the day and slept beside each other at night.

It wasn't love—not yet. I still didn't feel what I felt the morning after I slept with him. I don't know what opened within us that night, why our spirits were suddenly so in tune, but I knew this was not the same. This was caring and affection and—maybe—cuddling, but it hadn't blossomed into love again.

Kaiba was not, I discovered, a morning creature. He resented early working hours and complied only because he feared leaving Kaiba Corp. in the hands of employees. If they were like his secretary, I could hardly blame him. Every morning when the alarm went off he'd groan, bury himself in pillows and the comforter, and go back to sleep. I realized that the alarm was thus intentionally set nearly an hour early.

I peeked at the time on the clock: 6. Yawning, I pulled the comforter up so it obscured my view of the digital numbers and settled contentedly into the soft mattress. Tea, Mai, and Serenity weren't supposed to arrive to help me get ready until 9. The ceremony was at two. I sincerely hoped that no one died of heatstroke or dehydration due to perspiration—a July day could only promise to be disgusting.

"Why was the alarm so early?" Kaiba mumbled into my back.

"I don't know—you set it."

"Was there something important happening?"

"Go back to sleep. You don't need to get up for another three hours at least."

"Hooray," he muttered with a yawn.

I smiled as I let him doze off again. Then I placed my hands over the arm around my waist and fell asleep, too.

* * *

"WAKE UP!"

I grimaced. If ever I heard shouting in capital letters, that was it.

"Mokuba!" Kaiba snarled as he struggled to relieve himself of the comforter. The younger Kaiba laughed and flung a pillow at his brother, laughing even harder when it hit him in the face.

I smiled and turned Kaiba to me and kissed him. "Mokuba," I said sweetly, releasing a surprised Kaiba. "Your brother will be down to get ready in just a few minutes."

"Okay, nee-chan!" he cried, winking at me. I winked back.

"What was that about?" Kaiba asked, amused, brushing strands of hair away from my face.

"Oh, nothing," I murmured, lying back down on the bed and pulling the comforter up to my chest. Kaiba lay down beside me, covering himself haphazardly up to his waist.

"So," he said, rolling over to face me.

"So," I repeated playfully, gazing up at the ceiling.

"We're getting married today," he murmured, playing with my hair.

"Indeed." I could see him frowning out of the corner of my eye, and I smirked.

"Is that all?" he asked, moving closer and bringing his face close to mine.

"Mmmm," I considered it for a moment. "Depends on what you bought me as a wedding present," I teased.

"Do I have to buy you something?" he asked sweetly, gently kissing my neck. I gasped, and smiled.

"Depends."

"Stop being so conditional," he pouted, nibbling the skin gently.

I whimpered. "Hey! Shouldn't this wait until later?"

He propped himself up on his elbow and smirked at me. "All right then. Can we agree on what I get you as a wedding present later?"

"Of course," I smiled, burying myself in the pillows. He leaned over to check the time.

"8:30. Should I go down and start getting ready?"

"No," I chirped happily. "Stay here with me."

"Mmmmm… that sounds like a wonderful idea. But what about Mokuba?"

"You have three hours to get ready. How long can it possibly take me?"

"I can't imagine it taking me more than half an hour to get into a tux, although I'm not so sure about Yugi or Joey—gods know if they've ever worn one. I'll tell Mokuba to skip his homework and watch cartoons. That'll keep him occupied for a while."

"When did you tell the guys to arrive?"

"Mmm… I don't remember. Probably around 9. The photographer wanted to take pictures." He yawned. "I'm sure I'll find out when they ring the doorbell." He collapsed back onto the bed next to me and lay there.

We lounged like that for the remaining half hour, until the sharp ringing of the doorbell stirred us. Kaiba yawned again and swung his long legs out of bed. I continued to lie quietly as he padded out to the hallway to see who had arrived.

"Morning, Kaiba!" I heard Joey yell.

"Shut up, Joey! Can't you see he's half-asleep?" Tristan admonished. I giggled into the pillows. Kaiba was _definitely_ not a morning person.

"Hey! I was just trying to be friendly!" Joey protested.

"Be friendly later. Let's go change now," Duke snapped. Another charming morning person, I could tell.

"Come on, guys, Kaiba's probably anxious to get going," Yugi urged.

"Not really," Kaiba mumbled, stifling yet another yawn. "But since you're here, we might as well start."

"Be nice," I called from the bed.

Kaiba turned and glared at me. "What makes you think I wouldn't be?"

I smiled knowingly. "Oh, nothing. Have fun."

"Thanks," he said dryly. "And you have fun when the girls arrive."

I smiled. "I will."

* * *

"Good morning!" Serenity cried happily, practically bounding into the room.

"You too," I called from the bathroom. I splashed another handful of cold water on my face and wiped it dry. My hair hung wet and stuck to my chemise and back. I grabbed a towel and attempted to dry it as I wandered out into the main bedroom.

"All right, hon, where should we get started?" Mai asked, dumping a huge bag on my bed.

My eyes widened. "Um… my hair?" I asked, holding out the wet towel helplessly.

"Well, let's get it dry, at least," Mai said, taking control. She dug through her bag and pulled out a hair dryer. She thrust it into Tea's hands and ordered her to plug it in.

And so my morning began.

Mai dried my hair and tied it back loosely to keep it out of the way. Then she emptied my closet of wedding clothes and set to work.

"Make-up first," she decided. She ordered me to sit still as she examined my skin. "Nice… very clean. We won't need to do much." Still, she spread ample amounts of eye shadow and blush and applied enough mascara and lipstick to make my eyelids feel heavy and my mouth disgustingly waxy.

"I don't think Kaiba will want to kiss me with all this junk on my mouth. I wouldn't want to put him through the torture, either," I muttered. I quailed, though, when Mai turned her blazing violet eyes on me.

"Sorry," I mumbled meekly. "I'm just not used to wearing so much makeup."

Then came my hair. I let Mai and Tea argue and attack their way through that, without any interference from me. I felt them separate it into smaller chunks, then twist and pin and hairspray to no end. They found the small jewelry box I'd been stashing my wedding jewelry in; gold combs with pearls and diamonds were stabbed into my hair, and tiny little jeweled pins graced the crown of my head.

"Jewelry or dress?" Mai asked.

"I don't care," I managed to squeak, practically cowering in my seat, patting my stinging scalp.

"Don't touch that!" Tea shrieked.

"Dress," the three girls managed to agree. All three of them came at me with a vengeance; it was almost frightening how eager they were to dress me, as if I were an oversized Barbie doll.

After that they arranged my jewelry on me, and stood me before the mirror.

I gasped. I couldn't believe what I saw. Every girl wants to look their best on their wedding day, even me. The white dress fit me beautifully. The diamond necklace and bracelet set sparkled in the sun. My engagement ring was partially hidden by the white lace gloves I was wearing. I could hardly breathe…

"I never thought I would look this good," I murmured. "Thank you," I whispered, as I turned before the mirror.

Tea and Serenity beamed. "You look gorgeous," they reassured me.

Mai smirked. "Of course she looks gorgeous. _I_ got her ready," she said loftily, striding back into my closet for her dress.

I giggled to myself as I watched my bridesmaids struggle to dress each other and themselves. I zipped up zippers and put on shoes and jewelry as they did their own hair and makeup.

An hour and a half later, at 12:30, we stood together before the mirror, smiling at each other. They looked beautiful in the dresses we'd picked out—a different color for each: pale pink for Tea, purple for Mai, and sky blue for Serenity. I smiled at them and turned to go.

"Time for lunch!" I cried happily.

"Thank goodness!" Mai exclaimed, retrieving her gloves from the bed where she'd thrown them. "I'm starving!"

"You're acting more and more like my brother each day," Serenity commented quietly.

"Wahhh?" Mai wailed. Then, after a moment, she smiled. "I guess you're right, Serenity." The old Mai that we remembered, the aggressive, no-holds-barred and no emotional attachments Mai, was gone.

"Tristan loaned me his video camera. I set it up, so everything was caught on tape," Tea said, taking the camera off the tripod to bring it to lunch. We stared.

"You're kidding, right?" Mai asked hopefully.

"Nope," Tea smiled. "But only the four of us will see the whole thing."

"Thank goodness for that, too," Mai said, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Come on! We're going to be late to lunch!" Serenity called, already out the door and halfway down the stairs.

* * *

Mai insisted that Kaiba not see me until the ceremony, so I was forced to eat in a small room with my bridesmaids. The guests ate with Kaiba and the groomsmen in the main dining room, for the first time occupied and filled with warmth. Most of the female guests, however, wandered into our room in order to have a look at me.

I picked at vegetables and dip and fruit. My stomach refused to hold anything else (or so I assumed) except water and lemonade. I couldn't keep my hands or feet still; my foot kept tapping impatiently, and my fingers fidgeted nervously in my lap.

"Calm down," Serenity said, sitting beside me with a plate of finger sandwiches. _Easy for you to say_, I thought, amused. _Your name means calm._

"Nobody's going to bite you," Tea added, standing behind me and offering me a strawberry.

"Except those old ladies," I muttered, tilting my chin towards a group of older women. They were twittering and pointing at me—and not in a "Oh, look, isn't she darling? They'll be such a lovely couple," sort of way.

"Want me to go find out who they are?" Mai asked, delicately licking her upper lip free of bread crumbs.

"Go play the good hostess," Tea teased, pushing Mai out of her seat to my left so that she could sit down.

"Very funny, Tea," Mai said, stalking away to greet the female guests.

A few minutes later she came back and perched herself on Tea's knees, much to Tea's dismay. "They're the wives of some corporate buddies of Kaiba," Mai said, intentionally tossing her hair so that it hit Tea across the face. Tea scowled and pinched Mai's sides.

With a yelp Mai jumped up, causing the room of "proper" ladies to glance over at us. I met their gazes evenly and smiled politely, but said nothing. After a few moments of silence, they went back to their soft chatter.

"Anyway," Mai hissed, glaring at Tea. Tea smiled and stuck her tongue out in a decidedly childish way. "Some of them are wives of other CEOs, some of them are wives of the beloved Board of Directors."

"Ahh," I said, realization hitting me. "Well, I'll just have to show them I won't play their game."

"Hmm?" Serenity asked, looking at me with concerned eyes. "Wouldn't it be better to play along—for yours and Kaiba's sakes?"

"No," I sniffed. "I'm not going to be one of them. I'm young," I almost stopped, realizing how untrue that was, "Kaiba's young—they can't stop us from being young, or happy that we're getting married."

Tea and Mai nodded, knowingly. Serenity smiled her sweet, innocent smile and laughed. "I suppose you're right."

"Hey," Yugi called, poking his head around the doorframe. His eyes lighted on us, and he smiled. "It's almost time. Are you ready?"

"Of course," I answered smoothly, standing up and smoothing my dress with my hands.

"Please, everyone, go out to the garden and sit down. I'm sure we'll be starting shortly," Yugi said to the guests. Then he disappeared around the corner.

I took a deep breath, waiting for the guests to stream out of the room. Once they were gone, I followed them slowly out of the door and down the hallways to the garden.

* * *

As I walked down the aisle with all eyes on me, I let my gaze wander. I was not focused on walking in time, or smiling, or thinking about all the little details that needed attending to.

Yugi was standing beside Kaiba, beaming happily at me. I wondered if Yami were as happy as his physical counterpart… the thought nearly made me lose a beat in my procession, and I tried to banish any thoughts of Yami from my mind. I could not afford to break down at my own wedding.

Tristan had escorted Serenity, Duke had escorted Tea (much to Duke's dismay, and Tea's secret delight. Tristan, I heard, spent the entire ceremony smirking at Duke), and Joey had escorted Mai. I smiled, truly happy for them.

I smiled at the people in the audience, men and women I did not know (and probably didn't want to know), businessmen and CEOs and other important people. I no longer cared about making a good impression—but I did want them to see that Kaiba was not making a mistake.

When I reached the altar and stood beside Kaiba, our arms interlocked, I felt a gentle, yet powerful presence on my right. Without moving I looked out the corner of my eye to see Yami, a semi-transparent spirit that apparently only I could see.

_What are you doing?_ I asked.

_Nothing. I told you I would be with you_, he replied.

_You're taking up my mind_, I said crossly. _I don't even know what's being said about me and Kaiba, and I've probably missed a cue._

_Then I'll listen for you._

_Fine. What do you want?_

_Nothing. Just to be with you today._

_Why?_

_I remembered something last night._

_Huh? On your own?_

_Yes. Something that was important to me, 5000 years ago._

A mental sigh. _I assume you're going to tell me what you remembered._

_I remembered… being happy._

_Well there's a shocker_, I thought sarcastically. _I've seen you happy in memories before, you just never wanted me to tell you about them._

_True. It was because I wanted to discover them myself. What I remembered was more a feeling than an actual event—oh, Kaiba's looking at you. You might want to look back and smile._

_Thank you_, I thought dryly, as I turned towards Kaiba and smiled sweetly.

"I promise," Kaiba said softly, gazing into my eyes. We'd altered the traditional words to suit our own desires. I noted that his eyes were softer than before, and that the blue was not so much an ice blue as a deep-sea blue.

_I can't talk to you anymore. I'm supposed to say things now._

_Very well. I just thought you should know… that I remembered love, and what it felt like, and I remembered being with someone I loved… in a setting similar to this. I was marrying someone I loved with all my soul… and it felt like it feels now. What I felt for that woman so long ago… I finally feel again for you._

_Did you have to tell me _now_, of all times, when I'm getting married?_

He shrugged. _I thought I would tell you, so that you know Kaiba is not the only one who loves you._

I wanted to ask him about that last comment, but found that I was expected to repeat something… that I had missed, talking to Yami.

_Forget your lines? Here,_ Yami prompted, repeating them for me.

Obediently, I repeated them, and finished with, "I promise."

* * *

I turned to Kaiba, and smiled shyly. We'd never expressed any feelings for each other in public, and now we were getting married…

He leaned over slowly and kissed me lightly on the lips. I wondered why he didn't kiss me harder. He lingered there for a few moments, and then I understood. I kissed him back, slowly, savoring the feeling and he wrapped his arms around me really kissed me.

When he broke away I smiled at him, ignoring the strange silence behind us. His guests were largely silent, punctuated by polite clapping. I flushed, suddenly embarrassed. Mokuba and the others began cheering, trying to encourage us.

Kaiba smiled at me and I looked at him. "Don't worry. They're all old and used to being business people."

"Cold, haughty, and overly polite?" I asked.

He laughed. It was the first time I'd heard him laugh. "Something like that." As I turned to walk back down the aisle with him, he leaned over and lifted me off the ground. I laughed and instinctively curled inward towards his body.

"You used to be like that too," I whispered into his chest.

"I know. I'd still be that way—all the time—if it weren't for you."

"I'm flattered," I teased, smiling up at him.

* * *

The wedding party piled into the limo waiting to take us to dinner. I snuggled against Kaiba as the others sandwiched themselves in with us. It was an early, 5 o'clock dinner, but a late night of (presumably) dancing. Although I wasn't so sure very many of the guests would be into dancing…

Later that night, when there was only dancing left (A/N: It means I was too lazy—and uninspired—to write more about the wedding… I've already spent over 3200 words of fluff on it. Imagine it as you wish—especially cake cutting! ) I sat chatting animatedly with Mai. Earlier that evening, rather than tossing my bouquet to all 3 unmarried women (no, I'm not kidding—Tea, Mai, and Serenity were the only single female guests under the age of 30), I'd simply taken a single rose each for Serenity and Tea and given the rest of it to Mai with a smile. She'd been surprised, and speechless, but she smiled shyly and understandingly at me when Joey came over to ask her to dance.

I stifled a yawn as Mai left to dance with Joey again, and I smiled as I watched them. It was late, and I was tired, but I never tired of watching them. It was so terribly romantic, I thought… for all Joey's rashness and stubbornness, he really _did_ have a good heart. And Mai had softened so much…

I had nearly dozed off, a small smile on my face, when Kaiba touched my elbow. Startled, I sat up quickly—too quickly, apparently, because I upended a bowl of grapes on the table. Mumbling and apologizing somewhat incoherently, I turned to look at my husband.

"Dance with me?" he asked simply. I smiled and stood, reaching for his hand. I felt the flush creeping up my cheeks (thankfully, Kaiba's back was turned to me as he led me to the dance floor) as I remembered what had happened the last time we danced.

I leaned slightly against Kaiba as we moved slowly across the dance floor. I caught sight of Mai and Joey dancing, and I smiled, turning my head to watch them. There was something so beautiful about the way Joey was leaning in towards Mai… how lightly, and yet firmly, he held her long, thin hands in his. How gently his cheek rested against the side of her head. How innocently he turned to whisper in her ear. How dazzling her sleepy, secretive smile was at his words. The scene was so perfect, so beautiful… I thought for a moment it was their wedding, not mine.

"What are you looking at?" Kaiba asked softly into my ear.

I looked up dreamily at him. "Nothing… Have you seen Mai and Joey?"

There was an unusual softness in Kaiba's eyes as he answered me. "No. I've been watching you all day." I smiled happily up at him, and he flushed.

"Being romantic doesn't suit you, does it?" I teased gently, burying my face in his chest. "Although I like it when you are. You should see them. It's the sweetest thing in the whole world."

His only response was to squeeze me slightly and hold me closer. "Maybe some other time." I didn't press the issue.

We spun gently in those small circles for several songs, my eyes closed and my body relaxed against Kaiba's. He held me tightly—I hardly noticed how tightly—against him, nearly supporting my tired weight. At last, he put his lips right against my ear, so that only I could hear his whisper.

"Sleepy?" he murmured, just barely nibbling the edge of my ear.

I smiled sleepily and shifted myself in his arms. "Just a little."

"Don't be," he whispered, almost seductively. "There's still so much time before we leave tomorrow…" _That's right,_ I thought faintly. _The honeymoon…_ I smiled secretly and snuggled against him.

"Wake me up then," I whispered into his neck. I felt his breath catch in his throat, and he swallowed hard, but said nothing more.

As we were dancing, people began leaving. They picked up their expensive wraps and coats, purses and favors, and began trickling out. I don't know if it was in response to me and Kaiba actually dancing, or whether they'd simply had enough. In any case, Mai stopped dancing with Joey long enough to see them off with Yugi.

Kaiba and I kept dancing, turning gently in circles to a song heard only by the two of us, a song that had no beginning and no end.

I didn't notice Yami leaning against the back wall, watching us with a hawk's eyes.

* * *

"Hey, come on you two," Tea called from across the room, breaking our reverie.

I smiled at her. "Why?"

"Let's go back home!" Mokuba yelled, jumping up from his place at the table. "We can have our own celebration there!" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kaiba's eyes narrow in annoyance. He loved Mokuba, yes, but apparently there were some things that even brotherly love couldn't change.

"I like that idea," I said loudly, leaning against Kaiba, daring him to contradict me. He sniffed angrily, but said nothing.

"Yeah!" Duke, Joey, and Tristan yelled.

"There are plenty of extra rooms in the mansion. You're all welcome to stay the night," I continued, ignoring my husband, whose grip around my waist was tightening. I smiled, knowing that I could do pretty much anything short of kissing one of them without serious repercussions from Kaiba.

"Are you sure?" Yugi asked gently.

"Hey, with a deal that good, don't ask—just take," Mai advised, striding over to take Joey's arm again. "Everybody's gone home, even those damn Board members, so we're free to party."

"I don't like the sound of this…" Kaiba finally managed with a frown.

"Don't spoil the fun," I pouted, turning around to face him.

"Yeah, Kaiba. Come on, you just got married! You can afford to have some fun with _us_ tonight—before you have fun with someone else…" Duke teased, winking at me. I laughed, and Kaiba flushed heavily.

Not surprisingly, Kaiba made no further objections to bringing the gang home with us.

* * *

Later that night, I wandered through the upended living room, cradling blankets and pillows in my arms. Kaiba had escaped upstairs with Mokuba nearly an hour ago, leaving me behind to laugh and cavort with the others. He'd apparently taken refuge in Mokuba's room, because when I went to raid the closets he was nowhere to be found.

Mai and Joey were curled on the couch, covered by Joey's tux jacket and Mai's wrap. I smiled, took the garments, and laid them over the back of a chair so I could hang them up later. I covered them with a soft down blanket, and felt my heart melt when they curled up beneath it together. I gently lifted their heads and slid a pillow underneath them, and moved on.

Yugi was lying on the floor, curled in the fetal position at the base of the couch where Mai and Joey slept. Smiling at his youthful innocence, I lifted him up (easily, I might add) and laid him down in a plush chair. I wrapped him in a blanket and gave him a pillow, smiling at him the whole time. I wondered where Yami was; by looking through a veil of magic instead of just my eyes, I could see Yami sleeping inside Yugi's mind.

I nudged Tristan and Duke into somewhat more comfortable positions (more comfortable, at least, than lying sprawled across the floor, where I had the suspicion that Kaiba would kick and trip over them, given the chance) and gave them each a pillow and a blanket. Tea was lying on the other couch, and I covered her as well. I tucked Serenity in where she lay on the loveseat. I gathered all of the coats and wraps and shawls lying around the room, and piled them in my arms. I shook my head slightly. Their clothes were going to be so wrinkled when they woke up…

I turned one last time to look back at them, and smiled. I was so glad they'd been there today, with me… Strange. I had the feeling that I'd never had friends before.

I saw the shadow standing in the doorway watching me, eyes flickering beautifully in the pale moonlight. His white shirt was loose (how un-Kaiba-like!) and his jacket and tie had been removed. He smiled slightly, that arrogant smirk softened by some alien presence.

"You're such a mother," he said, white teeth showing just barely in the moonlight. I wasn't sure whether it was a compliment or an insult.

I ignored the comment and made to walk past him. "Hang these up," I ordered, dropping the pile of clothes in his arms. His arms sagged slightly under the weight, and he gasped at the new load I'd placed on him. Smirking to myself, I walked down the dark hallway upstairs to our room, listening to his soft footsteps following me the whole way.

Once inside our room, I slipped into my closet and began changing out of my reception dress. Before I knew it his hands were around my waist, running gently and yet hungrily over my torso and up towards my breasts.

"Want help with that?" he murmured in my ear, pressing himself against me, one hand reaching behind me and fumbling with the zipper.

"I thought I told you to hang up the clothes," I replied, pulling coolly away from him. I turned to face him, fixing angry eyes on him. "Go on. Their clothes will be wrinkled enough as it is."

He sighed, shook his head, and gave a semi-snicker as he turned and left the closet. Smirking (again—I was beginning to pick up bad habits from Kaiba), I turned again to the long, silky negligee Mai had teasingly presented me with at the (very private) bridal shower. Stripping away the fine formal gown, I slid the smooth, cool material over my shoulders and slipped out into the main room.

Kaiba was still in his closet, hanging up coats as I'd directed. I slipped in, silent as a wraith, and noticed he was on the last coat. As he hung it up I slid up behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist in the same way he'd wrapped his around mine. I felt the muscles tense at my touch, and he slowly, unsteadily completed his task.

I dropped my hands lower, and heard the gasp escape his lips. He clung to the bar of his closet, knuckles white, as my fingers roamed carelessly over him. I heard him try—unsuccessfully—to steady his breathing. I smiled, purring, rubbing my cheek against the area between his shoulder blades.

With a strangled growl Kaiba turned and pulled me against him, pressing his lips against mine. I laughed and granted him entrance into my mouth. As he kissed me, he tightened his hold on my waist and lifted me off the ground. Obligingly, I wrapped my legs around his hips and let him carry me into the bedroom.


	36. It Has Begun

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm suddenly so busy… when there's supposed to be nothing to do!

This chapter is a bit traumatic… it seriously scared me after I wrote it. It's a bit freaky when the things you visualize turn out scarier after you've written it… or maybe my imagination exaggerates. Probably that. Anyway…

Responded to reviews by **yugikid**, **ElfPrincessKitty**, **Angel**, **O.owickedo.O**, and **Gardevoir-Mages** on my LJ. But since **Gardevoir-Mages** can't read my LJ…

**Gardevoir-Mages**: I've thought about changing the genre but there is drama in it later... or now, if you consider this drama. My definition of mystery is a lot more traditional, which is why I didn't select it as a genre originally. Sorry about that! I think it's because I use the new formatting that Karen-chan gave me... I'll be sure to post a link to your responses in the chapters. For instance, the link to this response on my LJ is http // www. livejournal . com / users / fairymage / 25200 . html Minus the spaces, of course.

Chapter 35: It Has Begun

I was rudely awakened the next morning by Kaiba's phone ringing. I groaned and almost yelled as I threw of the covers and lunged for the obnoxiously happy sound.

"Hello?" I snapped, hoping to scare away whoever was on the other end.

"I need to speak to Mr. Kaiba," the male voice on the other end said quickly.

"Mr. Kaiba is currently unable to speak to you." Kaiba, at hearing his name, stirred and mumbled something incoherent.

"Would you please tell him it's urgent?"

My eyes narrowed and I sucked in my breath sharply. It was all I could do to keep myself from snapping at him… _I'm sorry, Mr. Kaiba got married yesterday, stayed out at the reception until 11, had guests over until 1 or 2 in the morning, and then had sex with his new wife—and we won't go into the details of that. Quite frankly, I don't think he's inclined to talk to you._

Instead, I smiled grimly to myself and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I can't do anything right now. I can give him your message and ask him to call you back when he's able."

I was lying over Kaiba's torso, my right hand running absently over his chest, so it shouldn't have surprised me that he woke up. "Who is it?" he asked groggily, noticing I was on the phone. "Why did they wake me up?"

I smiled sweetly at my husband and covered the mouthpiece of the phone. "I don't know. Someone who wants to talk to you."

"Tell them I'm busy," he muttered, lying back down and pulling me with him.

Suppressing my giggles, I removed my hand and said, "I'm very sorry, sir, there's nothing more I can do."

"All right. Tell him to call the office, it's about the Duel Monsters tournament."

"Will do." The click on the other end of the line told me the unwanted caller had finally hung up.

"You're to call the office when you have a chance," I murmured, lying down and resting my head on Kaiba's chest. I smiled as I felt the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.

"Mmm… what was it about?"

"Your Duel Monsters tournament."

Much to my dismay, Kaiba sat up quickly, causing me to fall away from him onto the bed. He reached for the phone and dialed the number of his office.

"Hello? Yes, I'm sorry, what is it?" he asked rapidly into the phone. My eyes narrowed, and I sat up, crossing my arms across my chest. As he spoke, I became more and more irritated. Finally, I stood up and went the bathroom and started my shower. I doubted Kaiba would be off the phone before I finished.

Sure enough, when I stepped out of the steamy bathroom Kaiba was just hanging up the phone. I intentionally ignored him and went into my closet, looking for something to wear. I had a feeling that I wouldn't need to be worrying about making it to the airport in time for our honeymoon…

"I need to get to Kaiba Corp." I heard him say as he hurried into the bathroom. I gave a noncommittal murmur and continued dressing. When I was done, I headed downstairs to look for my friends.

I found Yugi stirring, blearily rubbing his eyes, yawning, and stretching. Everyone else was still sleeping.

"Morning," I said, feigning cheerfulness. "Hungry?"

Yugi stifled a yawn as he nodded. "Shouldn't we wait for everyone else to wake up?"

"No, it's alright. I'll just make them breakfast as they get up. Go upstairs to the guest room and shower and change. It's the room at the far end of the hallway, next to Kaiba's study." Yugi nodded and padded clumsily up the stairs, still half-asleep.

I headed into the kitchen, ready to make breakfast. I dismissed the cook, who was struggling to wake up and get ready, and told her that I would take care of it. As I stood at the heating stove, Kaiba tore down the stairs, briefcase clattering against the rails.

_Something must be very wrong_, I thought to myself. Nevertheless, I continued to ignore Kaiba as I cracked an egg over the hot pan. _I hope Yugi likes his eggs over-easy._

"I'm going to the office," he said quickly, poking his head into the kitchen. I made no response, except to expertly flip Yugi's egg over. "I should be back in a few hours," he continued, apparently not noticing anything wrong. Before I could respond, he was out the door and starting his car.

_Something's _really _wrong if he's not even waiting for the limo. _I, unfortunately, could care less what it was.

Yugi stumbled into the kitchen and sat down at the counter. I didn't mean to take out my anger on him, but I ended up slamming down his plate of steaming hot food with a loud clank. I thought the fine china plate would break, but to my relief it didn't. I abruptly turned away from Yugi and went back to the stove, angrily cracking eggs over the pan and frying them.

"What happened?" Yugi asked timidly.

"Nothing," I snapped. Silently, I berated myself. _This isn't Yugi's fault. Don't get mad at him._ I gritted my teeth in annoyance. _Well then who the hell DO I get mad at?_

"Morning," Joey mumbled as he stumbled into the kitchen to join Yugi at the counter. I practically threw a plate of food at him.

"Good morning, Joey," Yugi replied politely, nervously watching me. "Where's Mai?"

"Still sleeping… Hey, are you okay?" Joey asked suddenly, deep chocolate brown eyes fixed on me.

"I'm FINE. Why does everyone keep ASKING?" I snapped, banging the pan down onto the hot stove.

"Because you're not," Joey pointed out bluntly, and I gave a strangled scream.

"Joey!" Yugi admonished.

"What? I'm telling the truth."

"Not everyone can handle the truth early in the mornings," Duke grumbled, flopping down onto a stool at the counter. His plate nearly hit him in the face. He sat up sharply, green eyes narrowed.

"Hey, sweetie, I know you were probably up late and all, and you look just as cranky as me, but I don't appreciate hot food on a hot plate breaking my gorgeous nose."

I sneered at him but said nothing. He'd have to take that as enough of an apology. But he was right about one thing—I _was_ cranky, probably even more than Duke himself, King of the Morning Crankiness.

Within minutes the commotion in the kitchen woke the others in the living room, and they were soon gathered at the counter, munching on the breakfast I'd so _graciously_ provided. I was wiping down the other counters with such a vengeance I'm sure I put cracks in the marble surface just shining them.

"Where's Kaiba?" Tea asked innocently, and I flung the wet rag angrily in her general direction, proceeding to storm out of the room into the main hall. From there, I stalked up the stairs and threw the door to the bedroom open. My anger had left me completely exhausted, and I ended up lying across the bed, face down, buried in the sheets Kaiba and I had made love in just that morning.

"Nee-chan?" Mokuba asked softly, tiptoeing into the doorway.

"Nnnn?" I mumbled into the sheets.

"Where's big brother?"

"Where do you think he is, Mokuba?" _Why do you keep taking your anger out on others? _I reprimanded myself again.

Mokuba was silent. "Stupid…" I heard him hiss, and then his footsteps pounded away into the hallway. Silence fell over the house—I couldn't even hear the others eating downstairs. After a few long minutes—who knows how long it really was—I sat up and brushed back my hair. My eyes were strangely dry, and I sensed that my face was perfectly composed.

I hurried downstairs and poked my head into the kitchen. My friends noticed and looked at me warily, perhaps expecting me to turn a machine-gun (or one of Kaiba's sarcastic tirades) on them. Instead, I smiled wearily and sat down next to Yugi.

"Sorry," I said simply, and poured myself a glass of orange juice.

There was a moment of silence as what I said sank in—the realization hitting even me. _Wow. Did I sound stupid…_

"I mean… I'm sorry…" I trailed off, and let out a frustrated sigh.

"We understand," Serenity said simply, placing a hand over mine.

"Where'd that jerk go, anyway?" Joey asked, crushing a piece of toast—probably what he'd like to do to Kaiba, given the chance.

"To his office."

Gasps ran around the table. "What about your honeymoon?" Mai asked, shocked.

I shrugged. "I'm not worrying too much about what outfits I'm supposed to pack now."

"That's awful!" Serenity gasped, clearly horrified.

"Yeah, that's kind of weird, even for Kaiba," Duke agreed.

"Don't worry about it," I reassured, sipping my orange juice. "It's fine. It was stupid of me to expect so much." I ignored shocked looks and outright anger as I finished off the juice.

"Now _that's_ stupid," Tea snapped, standing. "You can't blame yourself for this."

"I'm not," I replied simply. "I'm just saying it should have been obvious to me where Kaiba's priorities are."

Eyes narrowed, but no one argued with that. I shrugged again and stood, carrying my glass to the sink.

"You guys are welcome to go home, if you want. I have some things to take care of…" Actually, I had a certain pair of guardians to rage at for putting me through this…

"I have a few errands to run, but I'll be back," Mai said quickly. "Come on, Joey. Let's get this done with now." Joey, like a puppy seeking approval from its master, trotted out after the tall blonde woman.

"Hey, Tea, let's go check on Grandpa. Then we can come back here," Yugi suggested. I wondered if Yami was telling Yugi how very much I wanted to be alone right now.

"Okay," Tea agreed. "I'm pretty sure Kaiba won't be back before then…" she muttered.

Duke, Tristan, and Serenity were quick to make plans to get out of the mansion (I fail to remember exactly what they were), and soon I was left alone in blissful silence.

Except for Mokuba.

"Did Seto _really_ go to Kaiba Corp.?" he asked, almost disgustedly.

"Yes," I replied evenly, not daring to look at the younger Kaiba.

"When he gets back, I'm gonna…" I heard him mutter as he tromped upstairs.

"Mokuba!" I called after him.

"Yeah?"

"I'm going out for a little bit, okay? I'll be back in a few hours. If the others come back, tell them to make themselves comfortable." Before he could respond, I had shut the door with a sharp click.

* * *

I couldn't quite figure out _why_ I wanted to go back, I just knew that I had to. Something was pulling me back… I vaguely remembered the last stone I had been looking for the day I left, remembered how it had begged to be discovered and its secrets unlocked. Maybe that was what was drawing me back, like a fish caught on a silver hook. Maybe that was what I was looking for.

Then again, maybe I just wanted to scream and rage at them for arranging my marriage to Kaiba and the ensuing emotional hell I'd been through. That was probably more like it.

As soon as I got to the house I hurried into the kitchen. Nobody was there, but I was content to wait. I poured myself a glass of mango juice, and sipped it impatiently. When it became clear that they were not returning soon, I tried to clear and relax my mind. It would do no good to talk to them—or anyone—if I kept being angry and grouchy.

Slowly, I began to let the past few days slip away. I forgot how angry I was at Kaiba, how sad I had been when I talked to Mokuba, the reassuring solidity of Kaiba's arm around my waist as we slept, the comfort Yami's presence offered at my wedding, everything that had happened last night… Slowly, surely, like the rind of an orange being gently peeled away, the recent memories fell away, and I opened myself to the ancient ones.

I wasn't fully prepared to Channel. I was _preparing_ myself, but I didn't expect to tap into any memories. There was no one around, no object of the Channel—how could it happen?

But it did.

* * *

It was a blinding, fast, blurred memory. Like a broken record, it kept playing over and over. The same broken, tattered images. The same harsh, grating sounds. The same colors and shapes whisking by my eyes, too fast for me to see.

But this was different. This memory _hurt_. The pain shot through my bones, laced through my muscles, brought me down to the floor with its strength and intensity. Better than any chains it bound me there, lying sprawled over the cold linoleum.

The dark, deep, frightening chanting began to fill my ears and the room. At first, it was just one voice—one deep, rich male voice, chanting the ancient words I didn't understand. As he finished the verse and began to repeat it new voice joined his, and the pain increased tenfold. As more and more voice joined into a loud chorus of silk and knives, the pain became more than unbearable.

They were tearing me apart. My physical shell screamed for mercy, the tears flowed hot and burning down my cheeks. My voice grew harsh screaming for help, for mercy, for the cold of the floor beneath me to envelope me and take away the burning in my body.

But more than that, they were ripping out my soul. I could feel it leaving me, forsaking me, called away by some higher power. It flowed out of me from my mouth as I screamed, my nose as a struggled to breathe, my fingertips as I grasped blindly, my eyes as I fought to see, from every pore and every inch on my body. It flowed out of me as quickly as blood from an open wound, as swiftly as a river after a storm.

In the ghostly, half-memory that shrouded me I watched in horror. My body lay strapped to a stone, thick pieces of leather over my torso and legs, heavy chains around my ankles, neck, and wrists. I was fighting, struggling… hands reached down to hold me, whips cracked and I felt the stinging somewhere on my body. Then the chanting began, and the cycle of pain repeated.

How many times the sequence replayed itself I do not know. I know that after some time I fell silent, the strength to scream lost to me. I writhed on the floor of the kitchen in silent agony, waiting for one of them to return and stop the memory. My eyes had even failed to shed tears, as there was no liquid left in my ducts, no blood, even, it seemed, in my veins.

Suddenly, the cycle began again, and I felt it was different. It came, began, coursed through me with its destructive power—and then the memory continued. I shrieked as the chorus reached its peak, the pitch grown high and frightening. Voices—hundreds, thousands, who knew how many?—were practically yelling the ancient chant. My body arched in pain, and no hands reached to stop me.

Where I could feel my spirit escaping I suddenly saw light—light, soft, golden, glowing, flowing from my body. It drifted upward, pulled by some strange magnetic force, and congregated in a glowing orb hanging above my head. The light began to grow brighter, and brighter, then began pulsing with its own energy and force. Fear and dread began to grow in my stomach, as I watched the golden light become tainted. Dark, black light joined it, twisting and twining its way into the gold orb, like cracks in a perfect pearl.

The voices grew even louder, deafening—they were not even speaking intelligible words anymore, just strange sounds blending together to form that piercing chorus of pain. The light above me grew brighter, bolder, even as it continued to flow from my flesh. The light began to pulsate more intensely, and as it did the darkness grew and spread, reaching its tentacles over the pure gold light like a disease, as if they were fingers strangling a newborn child.

Finally, the voice reached their true climax and rose, singing sound seeming to join with the light above. As suddenly as it had begun it ended, leaving a resounding silence in its place. In that moment of emptiness, time seemed to speed up, and all I could see was the gold light pulsing faster and faster.

Then—one word. Just one word.

"Unleash!" the voice cried.

And the globe above me stopped spinning and shattered into a million shimmering, light, dark fragments that rained down upon me like shards of glass.

And then the darkness came.

* * *

"Stop!"

His voice shattered the memory, broke it apart and freed me from its curse. I lay weakly on the floor, not daring to move. I could still feel the pain, the fear, the utter dread as the golden light disappeared, consumed by the darkness.

He took my head gently and laid it on his lap, stroking my hair. The tears came, hot and fast, and I curled up and buried my face in his stomach.

"Shh…" he murmured gently, rubbing my back. "It was just a memory." But I could hear the edge in his voice, the uncertainty—and yes, the _fear_. This was no ordinary memory, and we both knew it.

I heard her footsteps as she burst through the door. It banged open, and she didn't even stop to close it. Before I knew it, she was kneeling beside me, hands on my shoulders, warmth coursing through my body.

"What happened?" she asked, fearfully, to either of us. "I was looking for my brother… and then I felt it, and I saw it, and…"

"It has begun again," he whispered. I said nothing, only continued to weep and shiver.

"No," she said slowly, the warmth draining from her touch. I dared to look up, and I saw that beneath her beautiful dark skin she was paler than a ghost. "It can't be… she's not ready…"

"She must be. There is no choice." His voice was firm, commanding, but I could still detect the tremble at its periphery.

"No… No!" she screamed. "It can't… she's not… She'll _die_!"

"She _can't_ die until it is complete! We have no choice!" His voice was raised in fear. "If it is time, then it is time! She _must _be ready! _They_ are, so she must be too!"

"You know she's not!" Her voice had reached a shrieking pitch—something I'd never thought possible from the quiet, demure woman. Her hands were shaking terribly, even as they clenched and unclenched against her thighs.

"It has begun," he repeated, but his voice sounded dead, hollow. Not at all the mysterious, comforting voice he'd always offered me.

"But… how can we help her? I _must_ go after my brother. We need him in order to prepare her! And without him, there is no trinity to unlock the ancient stone!" I understood now—she was as frightened as I was.

"I know you must. Go after him. Find him. Bring him back. Do whatever it takes, short of killing him. I will do my best while you are gone." Even he was scared of whatever was happening.

"Please…" I found myself whispering. "Tell me what's happening."


	37. Breaking the Seal

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Nothing new, really. Just wanted to say hi and thank my reviewers.

Only (counts on fingers) 9 more days of school left! And only 8 if you don't count Senior Activities Day on Friday!

On another random note, I tested for my last brown belt last week and passed! Unfortunately, I probably won't be able to get my black belt, since I'm going away to college and won't be able to drive myself back every week for class… -sadness-

Oh yes, and because your's truly is a bit retarded, from here on out just GO WITH ME on everything that happens. The story's become some weird warped mix of AU and regular YGO fic.

Responded to reviews by **Raiyne Nagakura**, **yugikid**, **Gardevoir-Mages**, and **Angel** on my LJ.

**Gardevoir-Mages** (Chapter 35): Brilliant but mean... I don't think I want to be that. I know someone like that, and I hate them. But I suppose with the qualifier, it's a compliment. Sorry the LJ doesn't like you... -meeps back- Thank you!

Chapter 36: Breaking the Seal

He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me gently off the ground. I stood, trembling in his brotherly embrace, too scared to even look either of them in the eye.

"Come. You are exhausted and scared."

He led me to the living room, where he laid me on the couch and wrapped me in a blanket. I hadn't realized I was shivering until then. She came in with a cup of strong coffee, and offered it to me.

"Drink it. It will help stabilize your mind," he ordered. I almost wanted to laugh. _Coffee? Stabilize my mind? It just makes most people hyperactive._ I gulped down the scalding hot drink nonetheless, ignoring the burning of my throat and concentrating on the new warmth that spread through me.

He took a deep breath, and began.

"Do you know who you are?"

I shook my head. "I know… that I am 5000 years old. That I am some remnant of the last Pharaoh's reign. But beyond that… I know nothing."

He nodded. "When you are stronger, there is something you must see to fully understand."

"We cannot tell you," she cut in. "We are forbidden."

"I don't understand," I said shakily. "How can you be forbidden from telling me? Aren't you my guardians? Don't you know? And wouldn't it be easier—and safer—to just tell me?" I realized I had become short of breath as the questions came tumbling out. "Because if I have to find out from memories like that one—" my voice had become fevered, and I was almost yelling—"then I may not ever figure out who I am." My voice dropped to barely a whisper as I wrapped myself tighter in the blanket.

"Yes. It would be. The memory you saw… _should_ have disturbed you. I am sorry—truly sorry—we could give you no warning. We are forbidden from doing very much. The rules are strange, strict, yet oddly flexible. None of us fully understand them. We can only abide by them."

"Who sets the rules?"

She answered. "You do."

"What? I can't! I wouldn't do a stupid thing like this!" Tears were threatening to come out the corner of my eyes, and I hurriedly wiped them away.

"You do. Inadvertently and unintentionally perhaps, but you do. More specifically," he said slowly, eyes traveling up my forehead, "_that_ does." His long finger pointed to the center of my forehead, where my hair fell low.

"_This?_" I whispered, parting my hair and fingering the Crown.

She nodded. "It makes all the rules… You know it governs your life, your death, your past, your Destiny. Thus it governs us. We were chosen by it to wield these Items, and we were chosen by it to be the trinity and be your guardians. We must abide by its limitations."

I said nothing, waiting for them to continue. "That is all we can tell you," he said finally, almost dejectedly.

"But," she said quickly. "When you become stronger, we can tell you more."

"How can I become stronger? Why must I become stronger?"

"I will train you to be stronger. Strong enough to go on your own, at least."

My head was pounding from the riddles they were speaking in. And I was still scared…

She rested a reassuring hand on my knee. She, at least, seemed to have regained some composure, and was looking at me with dark eyes. "As for the second part… the why is the most difficult part. All I can tell you is that a great evil is rising, and you must stop it."

"That's it?" I asked dully. "Then why did you need me to marry Kaiba?"

"The power of the Rod and Puzzle must be joined. They are the final pieces." He said, back to his old, cryptic self.

"Yami… and Kaiba?"

"Yes. The Pharaoh and the Priest. And you are the one who will join them. Are you not?" she asked directly, daring me to contradict her.

"I suppose…"

"Their power is part of this just as much as yours. The other Items are paltry nothings compared to what is possible with those two—and yours."

"But if there are only seven Items…"

"That is something we cannot tell you." He looked almost apologetically at me, and I looked away.

"I must be going. I must find my brother and bring him back here to complete the trinity." She stood and walked out the door. "Remember," she said to me, as she stepped through the doorway, "be strong. Your wings are yet weak, but they are not useless. What you saw is just a memory. There is nothing yet in this world to fear."

As soon as she was gone he turned to me, gazing impassively at me. With a sigh his eyes fell closed in something close to meditation.

"You need to get back to the Kaiba mansion," he said finally. "Your friends—and husband—are waiting for you."

"And then…?" I prompted.

"And then you must wait for word from me. When I am ready to begin training you, I will bring you back here. Kaiba's Duel Monsters Tournament is starting. He, Joey, Yugi, Mai—all the others will be preoccupied. It will be easy for you to train undistracted. And they will suspect nothing," he finished, with some note of satisfaction.

I nodded. "All right." I stood, placing the mug on the table and folding the blanket up. I walked to the door and gazed outside at the bright sunlight. It was only three in the afternoon, yet it felt like midnight.

* * *

Indeed, the Duel Monsters Tournament proved useful beyond belief. It kept Kaiba constantly busy, too busy even to attend to our honeymoon. That was fine with me. They had made clear that whatever training I needed to do was urgent, and the memory had scared me into agreeing with them.

Joey, Yugi, and Mai were all participating, which effectively kept them from worrying too much about me. And their fan club inevitably followed them. Mokuba was always out with Kaiba monitoring the tournament, so I was left alone. I promised to come watch them duel, and did so only to reassure them that I was still alive.

Otherwise, I spent my time training with him. The first time I went to the house, I saw the protective and shielding spells around it, and frowned. Whatever we were doing, he was trying to make sure that nothing happened to the house, and that the neighbors didn't see anything. I wondered what we could possibly be doing.

"Stand there," he ordered, pointing to a spot across the room from him. He'd moved all the furniture in the living room to make room for us. I obediently stood in the spot and waited nervously.

He held up a tiny green stone and told me to look at it. I studied it carefully, noting its glass-like quality and its sea green color. I frowned, though, as I began to see magic glimmer at its edges.

"It is a mere sliver of stone, broken from a much larger, more dangerous piece."

"I don't like it," I said quickly. I was becoming slightly nauseous, and the Crown was growing warm on my forehead.

"You shouldn't. The Crown and the parent stone are not compatible. It is called the Orichalcos stone, and there is a long history behind it. You must discover it yourself, but I am here to try to prepare you against it."

"What do I do?"

"When I release the magic, a magic circle will form on the ground. Normally, one would need a Duel Monsters card to do this—"

"What? This has to do with Duel Monsters too?"

He nodded. "Everything is connected, my child. As I was saying, normally I'd need a card, but this piece is small and weak, and I have some magical power. But be warned, even though the piece is small and its magic weak, it is still _very_ strong."

"Okay."

"When the circle, or seal, forms on the ground, I want you to focus your power on destroying it."

"What?" I'd never done anything other than Channel with my power…

"The Crown's power can do much more than Channel with ancient memories, my dear. You must know that—do you think you would still be here if all you were meant to do was Channel for all eternity?" I didn't answer the question. It didn't warrant one.

"Don't worry. It's just an experiment. And I can banish the Seal myself, if you cannot."

"All right," I finally agreed, bracing myself for what was to come.

His eyes closed and he held the stone out before him, and began chanting. I narrowed my eyes and focused on the tiny sliver held between his forefinger and thumb. As he chanted, I watched the green magic seep out of the stone and over his hand, dripping to the floor. My stomach clenched as the magic spread over the carpet, flowing down invisible pathways in an intricate pattern.

Before I knew it, the Seal had appeared on the floor around me. I began shivering as I felt its power push at the edges of my consciousness, and I struggled to shove it back. I realized that I had no idea how to do it, no idea how to harness my power and make it do my will. The realization frightened me, and I felt whatever control I had slip away. The sickly green magic wormed its way into my mind, and I felt its searing presence.

I cried out and collapsed to the floor, hands clenching into fists. Some small, stubborn part of me fought to stand, and I managed to make it into a crouch, one knee up, the other down. My shoulders were hunched over, bent by some invisible force over me.

Suddenly, it was gone, and I realized that he had banished the Seal on his own. He was standing over me, arms around my shoulders, forcing warm magic into my body. I hadn't realized I was crying, either.

"Let me try again," I hissed through clenched teeth.

"Are you sure?" he asked quietly, still massaging my shoulders.

"Positive," I snapped.

As he walked away and let me stand, I began clearing my mind. _Think of it as modified Channeling_, I told myself. When my mind was blank, and raised my head and looked straight at him. He nodded, and unleashed the stone's power.

The green magic returned, but this time I felt more ready. I searched for my power, buried deep somewhere within me. I unconsciously reached for it every time I Channeled, so shouldn't I be able to reach it now, when I needed it?

Of course, it didn't help that I didn't know where it was. As I felt the green magic push against my consciousness I began to panic, frantically shuttling through my mind looking for my power—whatever it was. This time, there wasn't even any warning—the green magic flooded my mind, clouded my vision, and when I was able to blink and clear my eyes he was laying me down on the couch and covering me.

"Let me get you some coffee," he murmured, hurrying away.

I sighed, aggravated. I _wanted_ to do this—I didn't want to screw up again, and start the cycle all over. I couldn't take indefinite immortality for much longer.

But then again… did I really want to leave them all behind—forever?

I shook the thought away violently. _If you stay_, I reminded myself, _then they die. That's the way it works. So don't even think it_.

As I relaxed my body against the soft cushions and lowered my eyelids, an image flashed before my eyes. _A small, glowing sphere of gold light_. My eyes shot open, and I blinked rapidly. Yet still it floated before me, a vision just beyond my reach, haunting me, trying to tell me something.

_Could that be… the Crown's power?_ I frowned, closing my eyes, hoping for more. But nothing more came, just that soft, comforting glow. Involuntarily, though, I shuddered—it reminded me of the vision in the memory, the beautiful gold light being consumed by the inky darkness.

Timidly, I began searching my mind again for the image I'd seen. Slowly, like the sun rising in the east, the gold sphere came into view in my mind. It was small, smaller than I'd thought, and hidden in a stone chamber. Its soft light illuminated the carvings on the walls, and I was there long enough to make out just one.

The Dark Magician Girl.

The vision was gone as quickly as it had come, and all that remained before my eyes was the shimmering globe of light. It spun hypnotically before me, entrancing and captivating me. As I gazed, the soft gold light began to unravel, like a ball of yarn. The shimmering thread stretched out to me, snaking towards me, dancing lightly to a soundless tune.

Slowly, I reached my hand out to it, letting it wrap around and caress my fingers. It wound its way around my fingers, then slowly began moving up my arm. It bathed me in its warmth as it reached my shoulder, then went over my back to reach the other shoulder and arm. After it had wound its way down my other arm, it stopped moving and lay heavily over my arms. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath, reveling in the comforting weight of the light that shrouded me.

As I inhaled, the magic sank into my flesh, mixing and melding itself with it, until the golden light lay just below the surface of my mortal flesh, a new layer of light for my immortal spirit.

I opened my eyes, and blinked carefully. He was sitting beside me, on the edge of the couch, holding out the white ceramic mug. Gratefully, I took the steaming dark coffee and sipped it, thinking. When I'd drunk less than half the cup, I set it down on the glass coffee table and stood.

"Let me try again," I said coolly, stalking away to the end of the room.

"You are too weak," he murmured, not standing. "This method of training will not work. I had not realized you were so unprepared. It is our fault, I suppose."

"Just one more try," I demanded, leaving no room for argument. I lifted my right hand and held it out, fingers spread and waiting. He sighed quietly but stood nonetheless, and took his place opposite me.

The green magic rose again from the ground, casting its toxic glow on the walls. I took a deep breath, and waited for it to come at me. This time, I felt confident that I would not fall.

I closed my eyes and blinked slowly; as my eyelids parted, I released the energy waiting at the edge of my fingertips. The gold light flowed and streamed from my palm and pads of my fingers, twisting and swirling along. The multiple strands of light finally coalesced into one strong, true beam, and it radiated outward from my palm. It shattered through the green magic like glass, and the entire Seal crumbled around me.

I smiled weakly in triumph as the green magic disappeared, completely drowned out by gold light. My knees buckled and my head began to spin as the world went dark.

* * *

"Feeling better?" he asked, as I blinked rapidly to clear my hazy vision. I mumbled incoherently as I sat up in my old bed, rubbing my eyes like a child.

"You over-exerted yourself today," he chided gently, placing a cup of coffee and a plate of steaming casserole before me. "But not without reward," he added, a slight smile on his lips.

I grinned weakly and began eating. "What now?" I asked between mouthfuls.

"We try to improve on what you've already learned. Once you master breaking and banishing the Seal, we will slowly increase the strength of the Seal. I don't know how far we can train you that way, though, since one of us must always be able to banish it."

I nodded and continued eating. "I have a feeling there's more to it than that."

"Of course. But we shouldn't worry about that part now. What you _can_ do is learn how to play Duel Monsters."

"I already know how, a little," I said, remembering the day in the restaurant, when I'd beat Mai so easily.

"You must learn the tricks and skills from the Pharaoh, the Priest, and the final warrior."

"Yami, Kaiba, and… Joey?"

He nodded. "You must become better than all of them. The Crown will aid you somewhat, but you'll have to do a great deal of it on your own. As you become a better duelist you should be able to unlock more memories, which will help you construct the perfect deck—the deck needed to end the cycle."

My head was beginning to spin, but I said nothing. I would have to get lessons, somehow, from the three, in between all of their other Duel Monsters commitments. I pushed aside my now empty plate and swung my legs out of the bed. I stretched luxuriously and prepared to go.

"Be careful," he warned perfunctorily.

"Of course," I replied, skipping down the stairs. He watched me as I shrugged on my coat and hurried out into the dark night.


	38. Museum of Memories

AUTHOR'S NOTE: WOO-HOO! -dances in circles insanely- HIGH SCHOOL IS OVER! -cheers more-

Yesterday was the LAST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL EVER! Today is Graduation and Grad Night… Man, I'm not going to survive until 3 in the morning… I'll look like Kenshin…

I've already mentioned the AU-ishness of this fic now, but I just thought I'd ask nicely again for your understanding. I haven't seen a new English dub in ages (I had Japanese School Saturday mornings), and I've seen 3 full episodes of the latest arc (the ones where Joey and Yami beat Rex and Weevil, and the first part of Joey vs. Valon. Oh yeah. I'm behind). So nothing follows anything, and I make up all the rules. Sorry… If I had more time I'd really try to be more accurate, but since I don't, you're just going to have to excuse my lameness.

Warning: This chapter is sad. I'm sorry. It didn't seem that sad when I wrote it, then someone told me they cried when they read it… and I was like REALLY? So yes. If you cry, I'm dreadfully sorry.

Replied to reviews by **Gardevoir-Mages**, **Angel**, and **Raiyne Nagakura** on my LJ.

**Gardevoir-Mages** (Chapter 36): Yup yup! Makes it more complicated and confusing-ish... also means that it turns into an AU fic because I haven't been following the storyline properly. Chocolate and coffee is good! They're the greatest things in the whole world... No! Don't snap! Not now! Um... okay. I'll have to remember to write more of those. ) I haven't quite figured out the Dueling part yet... I'm going to have to review the cards so I know what she should have. Nobody knows except for me! But if you read carefully, you might be able to pick up little hints... -giggles wickedly- Aww... I'm sorry, I think it's because I have a custom layout. I'll change that the next chance I get. Apples are yummy too! Man, I like all of you. I'm very confused... I should figure out how to sort the 5 of you.

Chapter 37: Museum of Memories

I reasoned that I could not hone my Duel Monsters skills until after Kaiba's tournament, when Kaiba, Yugi, Mai, and Joey had more time on their hands. Right now, they were up to their necks in duels—and other dark matters.

When I first caught whiff of the Rare Hunters I was instantly alarmed, a puppy whose hackles were raised, a kitten whose miniature fangs were barred, a dragon whose wings were unfurled and ready for a fight. Who were these jerks to mess around with my friends and their minds? I was prepared to go out and deal with the Rare Hunters myself, but he stopped me.

"This is their battle," he said in that soft way that spoke of infinite wisdom.

"But…" I protested helplessly. "Can't I do anything?"

"You can watch, and wait. They are plenty strong, my dear—they will withstand the Rare Hunters and their leader. They must fulfill this part of Destiny on their own. You, meanwhile, have other matters to take care of."

That said, we began training with the Seal again, and I very nearly did forget about the Rare Hunters. I was growing stronger at an agonizingly slow pace. Every time he summoned a new strength of Seal, I failed at least three times before I succeeded—and after every success followed the inevitable fainting-and-coffee routine. It frustrated me to no end, and I would often leave the house cranky and angry.

The day that I finally broke the Seal without fainting should have been a day of triumph for me. I had finally harnessed my power without over-exerting myself, which meant that I was becoming stronger, both magically and mentally. I jumped happily and hugged him (which surprised him quite a bit) when I found myself still standing at the end of the lesson, not needing coffee, my head not even spinning.

I treated myself to a cup of coffee with sugar and cream, stirring it until it became a warm, milky brown color. I smiled happily at the sweet drink and sipped it luxuriously. He grinned and passed me a cup of mango juice. I smiled and accepted it.

"You did very well today," he noted, a smile still playing across his lips. I nodded and allowed myself to revel in my victory for just a moment longer.

"So what's next?" I asked sharply, swallowing the last of the coffee and moving on to the juice.

He didn't seem at all surprised by my quick turnaround. "We wait for you to unlock more memories."

I sighed impatiently. "I have no control over that, you have no control over that, isn't there something we can do that we _can_ control?"

"Perhaps. Your dueling skills must definitely be improved. But that must wait until the end of Kaiba's tournament."

"And I still need to work with that stupid stone," I grumbled.

"That will also have to wait."

"What?" I asked sharply. I was still so weak… the power of the Stones that we worked with were nothing, I felt, compared to the actual power of the Seal.

"I can no longer control the Seal on my own. What you broke today was the extent of my power." I was, quite literally, shocked. I had always envisioned the two of them as invincible pillars of strength and wisdom and power… It unnerved me to hear that his power was limited to this, that he could not even begin to introduce me to the true strength of the Seal.

"But…"

"When she returns with her brother, we will be much stronger, trust me. We will be able to prepare you more adequately for the challenge you face. Speaking of which…" he added with a frown.

"What is it?" I asked anxiously.

"Never mind," he said quickly, and the look passed from his face. I worried, though… Finally, he smiled crookedly and looked at me. "Enjoy this while it lasts. You've made a great deal of progress in a short amount of time. It is not something to be taken lightly. Relax tonight. Come again in six days. By then, I will have hopefully come up with something more for you."

I nodded and left.

* * *

The length of Kaiba's Duel Monsters tournament irritated me, but there was nothing I could do about it. Mai, Joey, Yugi—they were all superior duelists who weren't about to lose quietly—or quickly. I saw them briefly nearly every day as I wandered the city like a lost soul. Then, tournament finals arrived, and everyone disappeared onto Kaiba's sophisticated blimp. I, of course, was left behind by choice. As much as I had missed my friends (and, to my surprise, my husband) during the weeks of the tournament, I couldn't afford to interfere. The Rare Hunters, I'd heard, were down but not beaten, and though I never ceased to worry, he'd pointedly informed me over and over that this was not my battle.

Mine, naturally, would come later, be infinitely more destructive, and would no doubt involve some freak-haired, creepy-eyed, weird-accented idiot intent on destroying the world via some moronic plan that he would be willing to die for. Which really, when you think about it, defeats the purpose of destroying the world, but I wasn't going to ask.

In the meantime, I began to focus on again on my Channeling. I wasn't sure where to find more memories, but then I remembered the exhibit at the museum Yugi and Tea had told me about. Yami had briefly mentioned it as well, but it had been careless and in passing. Curious, I set out for the exhibit on my own.

I picked what I thought would be the quietest day of the week (Thursday—who goes out on a Thursday?) and went late in the day, when most people would begin thinking about going home for dinner. I walked briskly down the streets, feeling the soft summer breeze whistle by. When I got to the tall set of steps, I felt a little tug at the back of my mind. Smiling slightly, I took the stairs two at a time until I reached the large front doors. I paid my entrance fee and stepped inside.

As I wandered down hallways I slipped off my light sweater, preparing myself for the coming Channeling. As I walked through rooms I saw artifacts and paintings from various time periods. I had seen most of them before, and most of the truth they were supposed to represent. None of them had suited my purposes and needs. None of them had helped me complete the cycle. I prayed this age would be different.

The Egyptian exhibit was, to my great delight, completely empty. Not a soul in sight. Perfect. I wandered around the room, trailing my fingers over the glass covering the ancient artifacts. They sparked at my touch, warming to my presence, eager to relinquish whatever they could offer me. Even in this life, in this time, in this place, they knew whom they were to answer to.

Finally, I settled down at a bench in the center of the room, facing an old stone tablet. It was one I hadn't seen before, which meant that it was either more recently discovered or considered unimportant for my Channeling. Whichever it was, I was going to unlock its secrets. I checked to make sure it was the right Pharaoh, the right time period, and then I reached out my hand, fingers spread, waiting. I steadied my breathing, and closed my eyes.

* * *

"_Yami!" she cried, hurrying through the halls. Even now, she used the name he told her over his given name._

_She skidded around a corner sharply, nearly running into the departing physician. The old woman grinned and patted her head._

"_You shouldn't be running, my child. We don't want anything to happen, now do we?"_

"_No, of course not," she replied, cheeks flushed with happiness. "It's just that…"_

_The old woman smiled at the young woman. "Of course. I understand."_

_She smiled at the doctor and hurried away, out into the gardens. Sometimes he would take walks out here to calm his mind, or just to think. She hurried past the blooming flowers and flowing fountains and found him kneeling before a young sapling. Its small, slim limbs reached upward, and tiny white flowers bloomed amongst the leaves. At the base of the tiny tree was a neatly kept circle of wild grasses and flowers. Embedded in the ground, barely visible amongst the blooms, was the Sign of the Temple laid in white stones._

_Her message of joy dried on her lips as she gazed at Yami kneeling there. She looked away, biting her lip, fighting the tears in her eyes. Even now, years afterward… both of them had wounds that even time could not heal. Great, gaping voids in their hearts that even the other could not fill._

_He must have heard her soft footsteps, because he turned his head to look at her._

"_Three years ago," he whispered. "So much has changed since then… because of it. I never thought… I never thought…" _

_At a loss for words, he reached out to her, and she went, curling herself into his embrace. He held her against him, stroking her hair, as the tears she had fought so hard against spilled out. From the way his body was gently shuddering against hers, she knew that he was crying as well._

"_It shouldn't hurt," she whispered into his chest. "It shouldn't hurt," she repeated numbly. "After all this time… why does it still hurt?"_

"_Because we loved him," he whispered into her hair. "Because we loved him, and he betrayed us."_

"_I can't believe…"_

"_Me neither."_

_She uncurled herself from his hold and crawled to the base of the tree. She laid her small, white hands over the trunk and leaned against it, almost hugging it._

"_Why?" she whispered to it softly, begging for an answer. "Why?" she wailed._

_He crawled to her and held her again, this time laying his hands against the tree as well. "Maybe there is a reason we do not know the answer, my dove. I'd like to think… that we do not suffer thus for no reason at all." She looked up into his dark violet eyes and saw the pain, the deep, consuming pain of betrayal._

_They remained silent for many moments, lying against the tree, trying to derive strength and courage from it and each other._

"_You had something to tell me," he said softly after some time, wrapping his arms comfortingly around her shoulders._

_She nodded, and allowed herself a half-smile. "Yes, I did."_

"_I'm sure that this is as good a place as any to tell," he murmured. "And I'm sure that…" Yami paused, then took a deep breath. "_He_ would have wanted to hear as well."_

_She looked upward into the snowy white branches, and gave a little smile. With one arm she continued to embrace the tree, while the other hand reached for one of Yami's. She took his long fingers and pressed them between her own, guiding them towards her. She laid them flat against her belly, and pressed them down gently._

_His eyes followed the line of her arm to her outspread fingers, and the web of his beneath hers. Startled, barely daring to comprehend, he looked back up into her eyes. She smiled weakly, uncertainly, the tears still shining in her eyes._

"_Is it…?"_

_She nodded, taking a little breath and smiling. Her fingers tightened over his. "Yes," she said, breathlessly._

_He smiled, amethyst eyes lighting up. Tentatively he moved his hand over her stomach, awestruck._

"_She said six months. She thinks it's a girl," she said smiling bashfully, looking away into the tree. _Are _you_ happy for me too? _she asked, wishing she could hear the answer._

_Yami repeated the words, still seemingly in shock. "I can't believe…" he managed to whisper. He smiled at his wife and kissed her. "She'll be so beautiful…" he murmured. Suddenly, his eyes narrowed and he frowned slightly. "Are you sure you're strong enough?"_

_She looked at him with wide eyes, confused. "Of course I am! Why wouldn't I be?"_

"_After the last time… and the time before that… they said it would be impossible for us to try again."_

_She shook her head violently, trying to dispel all of Yami's concern. "The doctor said everything would be fine. I'm still healthy, and so is she—" she pressed her fingers gently against her stomach for emphasis "—and everything looks fine so far! Last time I didn't even make it past two months."_

"_But the time before…" Yami's eyes clouded darkly. She looked away, stifling a sob._

"_This time will be different. I promise," she whispered, clutching his hand in hers._

_Yami gazed down at her helplessly. What could he do? There was no turning back now—either things would work out or they wouldn't. Neither of them had much control over it anymore. "Thank you," he whispered into her ear, kissing it lightly and hugging her close with one arm. With the other he gripped the trunk of the sapling, speaking to it silently. _Is this my punishment, cousin? To watch the woman I—no, _we_—loved suffer? She is trying so hard… Are you up there—angry, hurt, betrayed, laughing at our pain? Please, gods, leave her out of this… It is not her fault…

_She leaned her head back against Yami's shoulder, comforted by his presence. Out of the corner of her eye she looked up again at the tiny white flowers…_ I am so sorry I was not able give you the same, _she thought sadly, watching as a blossom fell and landed atop hers and Yami's intertwined fingers.

* * *

_

As the memory faded my hand dropped slowly, weakly to my lap. My body and spirit felt heavy, weighed down by the memory. I lay down on the bench, curling on my side, shutting my eyes tightly closed. I knew—_knew_, I don't know if it was from the stone or the memory or simple gut instinct—that things had not "worked out." And it pained me beyond belief.

But it wasn't over yet. No. It could never be so simple, could it?

As I lay there, I felt the gentle prodding at the back of my mind. I pushed it away; I didn't want to see anymore today. What I had seen hurt me, in ways I didn't understand. Why did I care so much? Was it because I loved Yami, and because Yami had told me that he'd wanted children, and it seemed as though his priestess-Queen could bear him none? Or was it something deeper than that? But the pushing continued… a small, weak, thin, persistent thread that wanted me to reach out and accept it. Practically whimpering, I sat up and looked around for the source of the message.

It was coming from a small stone in a separate case. It was only a fragment, a corner broken off in a square shape about the length and width of my forearm. Looking closely, I could barely make out the shapes of men and women. Squinting, I glanced down and noticed the tag accompanying the relic. I skimmed it, noting that it was thought to be from the period after the fall of the Temples. Shivers ran up and down my spine.

_The fall of the Temples?_

The plaque failed to elaborate any more on the subject. Gingerly, grimly, I reached my hand out towards the stone.

* * *

"_Go! Find every one of them and bring them into the main hall!" a gruff voice barked orders._

_The pounding of feet and the scuffling of shoes and men as they tore through the halls… the usually bright, gay rooms were dark, gloomy, and fires burned in many of them. I pressed myself against a wall and held my breath, waiting for them to pass. I had no idea what was going on. After fleeing the Hall of Kings with Yami, he'd sent me back to the safety of the Temples. I would be protected there, he said, by the priestesses._

_I hadn't expected this._

_Quickly, sensing they were gone, I scurried through the hallways and slipped into a closet. Heart pounding in my ears, I pushed open the trapdoor and hurried down the winding staircase, careful to slam the door shut behind me as I began my descent._

_I heard their praying before I saw them, the soft, pitiful chanting flowing quietly up the staircase. They would not be heard by the men pillaging the Temple. As my feet carried me lower I entered the soft circle of light cast by their candles and lamps. The chanting and praying died down, and silence followed. The only sound was that of my slippered feet padding down the stone steps._

_At last, I reached the second to last step and stood there, looking down on them. They faced me, fear and anguish written all over their faces. The High Priestess, the young girl who had been chosen the same day I was, raised her arm and pointed accusingly at me, her voice a sharp, shrill shriek._

"_Whore!"_

_The word echoed painfully through the stone chamber, and the other priestesses began to mutter darkly. Few of them would disagree with the High Priestess._

"_How dare you show your face in here?" she demanded, stepping forward so that only one step separated us. Her pale hand reached out and struck me hard across the face. I didn't flinch. She remained below me, trembling in rage. Yet even now, she knew I was her superior._

_I gazed sadly at the women who had once been my fellows—women that I'd grown up with, women that I'd loved and who'd loved me in return. And now, I could not blame them for their anger. I'd been chosen, over all of them, to be the High Priest's consort. And how miserably I had failed him, and the Temples. And now I had brought this destruction upon them._

"_I'm sorry," I whispered coldly. My emotions were gone, detached. I felt nothing inside me, but I was acutely aware of my physical self. I knew the white hands that lay still at my sides, the twisting bracelet Seth had given me on my right wrist, the exotic pearl ring on my left hand. The wrought-gold and sapphire ring from Yami rested on my right hand. The circlet of royalty rested over my forehead, while the heavy collar of a priestess hung about my neck. Two earrings—a ruby drop and a crystal shard. The fine linen of the Pharaoh's palace graced my body, while the traditional belt of the Priest's Priestess was cinched at my waist. What a paradox I was. At once Priestess, at once Queen. And yet at the same time I was neither._

"_What happened?" I asked._

_No one made a move to respond. But then one young woman stepped forward, elbowing aside her sisters to face me. I'd shared a room with her once, before I'd been chosen, before I'd moved away. Arya, that was her name._

"_They came for you."_

"_What?" I asked, eyes widening. "Impossible. They wouldn't…"_

"_They have," she said quietly, pain and tears manifesting themselves in her blue eyes. "After you disappeared, they came, all of them. They've only been here for a few hours, but this is what we've been reduced to. They knew you would come back here. You would've been safe here, any other time…"_

"_They say that it is time for a new system. A new way of thinking. All the priests here, out there, are following him," another priestess supplied._

"_Who? Who is he?" I demanded, lifting my chin at the challenge._

"_The new High Priest," the High Priestess said dully._

_I felt my body go cold, every ounce of warmth drained from me. My cheeks turned a ghostly white, my eyes widened in fright. I could feel my fingers begin to tremble. The other priestesses were watching me, equally as frightened as I was. Trying to collect myself, I took in several shuddering breaths before I spoke again._

"_What… does he want?"_

"_He has ordered his priests to burn the Temple and bring the priestesses before him," the High Priestess continued, not looking at me. _It must be hard for her_, I thought to myself_, not being able to protect her priestesses.

"_They destroying the Temples," the High Priestess repeated. "They are destroying the way things have always been. They are removing the priestesses from power, and putting themselves in our places. They are determined to control this half of the kingdom. They say they can speak to the gods, and yet we still hear their voices."_

"_The priests are telling us to blame you," Arya whispered. "They say the High Priest was too weak, and that you took advantage of him."_

_The whole situation seemed to be beyond my grasp. I could hardly understand the reasoning, or even what was going on. But I knew that the priestesses needed me now, even if they hated me, even if they wished me dead and worse. I knew only one way to help them, though._

"_Stay here. Keep praying. The gods will have mercy on us." I hesitated to use "us," fearing that they did not consider me one of them anymore. But if anyone noticed, they chose to ignore it. "Let me out through the secret exit. I will bring help."_

"_It would be better… if you would go yourself to him, and ask for mercy."_

_I did not know who spoke, and I did not care. At the mention of the new High Priest my body froze, frightened, and I shook my head violently. _This_ they noticed, and it only increased their own fear._

"_I cannot. It would serve no purpose other than to destroy any hope of help. I have had run-ins with him, and I am powerless against him." The High Priestess seemed to understand, and she stepped aside. The other priestesses quickly followed suit. I walked slowly, regally through them, but my hands quivered and my mind was in a frenzy._

_As soon as I had reached the door to the exit I turned back to them one last time. "I'll bring help, I promise," I whispered, then stepped out into the dark Egyptian night.

* * *

_

I stood before the stone, rooted there, barely able to support myself yet held there by some invisible force. The second memory frightened me as much as the first. The ominous, foreboding feeling in my chest had only increased. Everyone seemed to be trapped in endless webs, lost and confused and doomed, able to see the spider that came for them but unable to stop it.

The weight on my shoulders suddenly became too much as another, older memory came back to me.

"_What has happened at the Temples?"_

The words echoed in my skull painfully. _She went for the Pharaoh—the only one who could save the priestesses._ But the realization that there was hope for the priestess and her fellows did nothing to alleviate the pain coursing through my body. Even if the Pharaoh had been able to help, something told me it had been for naught. I dropped to my knees, closing my eyes, trying to block out everything I knew and didn't want to know.

"What did you see?" he asked quietly, footsteps echoing in the room.

I didn't stir. "How did you know I was here?" I attempted to avoid the question.

"I knew," he answered simply. "You could have gotten in for free, you know." When I didn't answer, he continued. "We could've gotten you in. If you'd wanted, you could've seen the tablets in the basement. They are similar to the ones underneath the house."

"I don't want to see them right now," I said quietly. _Or ever_, I thought to myself.

As if in understanding, he came to crouch beside me and squeezed my hand comfortingly. I opened one eye just enough to see the sad expression on his face. "Tell me what you saw."

"I'd rather not."

We sat quietly for a few more moments, then I opened my eyes and looked over at him. "Can you tell me what happened to the Pharaoh and the High Priest?" I asked quietly.

"Not all of it. Depends on what you want to know."

"How did they die?"

The question must have surprised him, because he was silent.

"That," he said quietly, voice low and solemn. "I can tell you."


	39. New Arrivals and Returns

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Wow, Anime Expo is starting in just a couple of days! XD I didn't connect the dots right… -- Anyway, hope everyone's having a great summer!

Just a couple of things:

1) Another reminder that this is now a semi-AU fic, because I stopped my limited watching of English dubs and ended up making all this stuff up.

2) I use the names from the English dubs because—and correct me if I'm wrong—it seems like more people know those names than the Japanese ones. Being Japanese, I prefer the original names (I mean… Jou is so much cuter than Joey!), but from skimming fanfics it seems like more people use the English names.

Warning for massive Dark Magician Girl OOC-ness, because I was apparently on crack when I wrote her. Oh, and some light sexual stuff near the end. Nothing bad.

WOW I got 7 reviews for the last chapter! Thanks so much you guys! Responded to reviews by **blue heartzs**, **Raiyne Nagakura**, **SilverFoxes-BlackWolves** (and **Angel**), **Gardevoir-Mages**, **trixygotback**, **yugikid**, and **agent-doo** on my LJ. If you still haven't found it, there's a link at the bottom of my profile.

**Gardevoir-Mages**: Sorry! It wasn't supposed to be an EVIL cliffie! So... hard... -wibbles- Do you mind if I just think of you all collectively? It'd help my head... Whoa! Hahaha, she'll certainly have a Dark Magician Girl (-gasp- I actually gave something away!) As for the other cards... eh heh... I haven't decided yet -wibbles- That's going to be hard, especially since I don't know my Duel Monsters cards very well. Sure; I usually only read SetoJou stuff for YGO () but I'll read something of yours... OO I envy you! -oogles all the reviews- What the hey do you need me reviewing for? LOL No, I most certainly would not want you dying. That'd be 4 or 5 dead bodies to clean up.

Chapter 38: New Arrivals and Returns

"There was a great duel… one of the Shadow Games. The Pharaoh and High Priest were so angry at each other, so incensed and so ready to kill each other, that they launched themselves into the Duel without thinking. They had always wanted to know which of the two was better, stronger… and now they had something to fight over."

"What?" I asked quickly.

A pained look crossed his face, and I wondered then how the Crown prevented them from saying certain things. "I can't tell you that…" he said sadly.

"All right. Go on, then, with whatever you can tell me."

He nodded and continued. "The Duel lasted many minutes. They were both exceptional duelists, as their reincarnations have demonstrated. But in the end, the Dark Magician, with the help of—" his words suddenly stopped, and his brow creased. Something he couldn't tell me. "The Dark Magician was able to defeat the Blue Eyes White Dragon," he finished, restating the sentence.

"That's impossible…" I said slowly. Dark Magician only had 2500 attack points; Blue Eyes had 3000. And Kaiba, even 5000 years ago, could not have been so foolish as to summon his Blue Eyes thinking it would automatically destroy Dark Magician. That would have been stupid, and no matter which century or country Kaiba existed in, he was never stupid.

"It is possible, my dear." He sighed then, as if the story weighed him down and made his heart heavy. "You know what happens when someone loses a Shadow Game," he said softly, dark eyes locking with mine. I cringed and lowered my eyes, casting them away from his piercing gaze. _Yes… of course I do._

"So… that was it? There was nothing anyone could do? Not even the Pharaoh?"

He shook his head sadly. "When the anger faded from all parties… they realized what a mistake it had been. The Pharaoh would have given anything to have his cousin back. He tried, several times, joining forces with the other wielders of the Millennium Items—to no avail. All of his power, combined with the others, could not bring the High Priest back from the Shadow Realm.

"The Pharaoh… that is a story that I can tell you even less about. He was killed at the end of his reign by a strange power… The one who wielded this power waged a war against the Pharaoh, and eventually defeated him. But without the Pharaoh's protection, Egypt succumbed to the darkness of the Shadow Realm for a long time. It was years before they emerged again, but the secrets of the past remain buried beneath sand and shadow."

Silence between as I considered his words. "I'm sorry I can't tell you more that you want to know," he said finally. I stood and moved over to a bench in the middle of the room, where I sat and stared at the ground. He came and sat beside me.

"I wish I hadn't asked you," I said ruefully, without a hint of amusement. "It just gave me more questions you can't answer."

"I know. I'm sorry for that. But you must understand…" he took my hands gently in his, and held them up before his face. He looked at me pleadingly. "If we could, we would tell you everything. _Everything._ It pains us to know but to not be able to help you. You are like a sister to us—sometimes maybe even like a daughter—and we hate the position we are in."

"I know," I said wearily. "I think I understand more, now… I was so angry earlier, that you made me marry Kaiba, and everything else that ever went wrong. I shouldn't have been. I wish I'd just accepted things as they came to me, without worrying about the how or why. It would've made my life so much simpler."

A strange look crossed his face, hanging in his eyes for the briefest of visible moments. "No, you don't. And if you do, you shouldn't. Maybe by letting things simply come to you, you avoid the problems and pain of fighting. And sometimes fighting doesn't do you any good anyway—what was going to come comes regardless. But how will you ever know, if you never fight?"

* * *

I wandered back home sad and lonely. Ever since the others left I'd been staying back at the old house instead of the mansion. Even though we lived in the same house, he didn't follow me home from the museum. Instead, he gave me a good hour alone in the empty house to contemplate what I'd seen and heard.

I wanted to be able to piece things together. I was desperate for some cogency, some understanding of what I knew and yet didn't know. Everything was meshed together in my mind, a giant mosaic of colored tiles that didn't match and didn't fit together into a beautiful picture. There were so many questions I had but couldn't answer, so many faces and events that I had some vague understanding of but could not describe. The girl in my visions, the priestess… who was she? She was the link the puzzle, the physical bond between the Pharaoh and the High Priest and the gulf that most separated them, the union of Temple magic and Royal sorcery, an utter paradox that was so important yet so unimportant that her image did not even grace the stone tablets.

And the new High Priest, who'd ordered the attack on the priestesses—who was he? And why had the priestess been so afraid of him? How had he become High Priest after the old High Priest—Seth, Seto's ancient incarnation—died? The men who'd sucked away her soul and her magic—where had they come from? Were they priests? Sorcerers? Were they after her because she was the Priest's Priestess or because she was Queen? The man who'd raped her—where did he come from? How had he found her? Why did he touch her, even when every law forbade it and both the High Priest and Pharaoh would have slain him for it? Had they done so? And what about the man she'd been dueling, the one she'd defeated with the Dark Magician Girl?

My head was beginning to ache and tears were threatening to come to my eyes. _How can there possibly be enough time? _I thought, frustrated, to myself. The memories were so slow, so broken and erratic. How could I ever piece together the story from them?

As I lay exhausted on my bed I heard the front door open softly, then click shut. So he was back. I remained unmoving where I was, listening to his soft footsteps as they moved the length of the entryway, then through what I thought might be the kitchen. He didn't make any attempt to come upstairs and see me. I wondered why. It irked me slightly that there was no one around to comfort me when I was so lost and anxious. What I really needed was someone to tell me everything would be okay—I didn't need to be told anything else. I needed to be reassured that I was strong enough this time, and that I wouldn't fail again.

But of course there wouldn't be anyone to tell me that. There never had been. Why would there be now?

As I lay miserably I realized that he was pacing downstairs. That was odd. He never paced—he was never anxious or insecure enough to pace. But he was definitely pacing, tracing the same footsteps back and forth across the pale linoleum floor. I heard him stop, the clink of coffee mugs and the soft gurgle of the coffee machine starting to brew. Then his relentless walk resumed, and I was left to ponder this interesting situation.

I didn't have long to think. Just minutes later, as the delectable smell of coffee was beginning to waft up to my room, I heard the front door open again, and he was instantly in the foyer. Not sure what to expect, I tiptoed out onto the stair landing and waited, like an elementary school child, at the top of the stairs, listening to the conversation below.

"I made coffee," he said. _So he knew someone was coming. That was why he was pacing—they must have been late._

"Thank you," her voice floated up, and I started. I'd gotten used to the absence of her presence, although he was just like she was.

"I see you found him."

"Yes. He'll come to in a day or so. The whole ordeal… exhausted him."

"Hmph."

"Don't be so harsh. You know… what it is like. They catch you at your weakest… and you must simply prove to be stronger. It took him longer than it took us, that's all."

"He caused enough trouble in the meantime."

"But it was necessary. Trust me. Everyone is better for it."

"I'm sorry. It's just been frustrating without you two… Here, lay him on the couch. I'll get him some blankets and a pillow later."

"Thank you. He can stay with me."

"We'll figure that out later." A long pause. "She's upstairs."

"I know. I can sense her too." I flushed, embarrassed. They both probably knew that I was crouched on the landing listening to them, but weren't saying anything. It was like getting caught with your hand in the cookie jar.

"She needs to go back," she continued smoothly.

"I know. She wasn't counting on staying here, I don't think. Only until the tournament was over."

"It is. Kaiba and the others should be on their way back now."

"All right. You can tell her." So maybe they didn't know where I was… knowing them, that was pure wishful thinking.

A comfortable silence followed as she moved into the kitchen. "The coffee's not done yet," she commented, as I heard the scraping of a stool against the cool floor.

I decided that I might as well go downstairs now. They knew I was here—of that I had no doubt—and I needed to be getting back to Kaiba's mansion anyway. It was late, later than I was usually out, so I hoped that one of them would be willing to accompany me back. I tripped down the stairs lightly, then stepped into the kitchen and sat down beside her. He poured the now finished coffee and handed me a cup.

"I didn't know you drank," she commented, stirring sugar into her own.

"I acquired a taste for it while you were gone," I replied, taking mine black.

"It helped during her lessons," he said quietly, and she said no more on the subject.

"Your brother…" I asked curiously. "You found him, right? Is he all right?"

She nodded as she took her first sip. "He's fine. Tired, and magically spent, but other than that he'll be fine. It'll be a little while before he's completely caught up and can help you, but in the meantime you have the two of us."

I nodded, and then silence fell. He coughed gently to break it, then looked pointedly at me. "She went to the museum today," he told her, though his eyes were still gazing at me.

"Oh?" she asked curiously. Her eyes then turned on me too.

Tired, with my nerves already irritated, I put down my mug and stood. "Yes, I did. I'm very tired, and I really want to be getting back to Kaiba's mansion." That was one of the things I'd liked about being alone with him. He never asked questions like she did; he didn't need to have everything I saw recreated for him, or know everything that I knew.

She looked over at him quickly but he said nothing and nodded at me. "All right, I'll walk you back."

"Come back whenever you're ready," she said, throwing caution to the wind. Apparently she sensed that I could not be forced into anything now, and that whatever I did, whatever further steps I took in this process, would be dictated by me.

I gathered my sweater and stepped out into the warm summer night, and he shut the door soundlessly behind us.

* * *

The door to Kaiba's mansion opened soundlessly before me, and I slipped inside. It didn't seem anyone was home just yet—surely Kaiba and Mokuba were on their way back. I just had to wait a few minutes. I bid him goodnight and watched him disappear into the darkness. Watching his back recede, I wondered if he was part of the darkness, he blended in so well. As soon as I could no longer see him, I shut the door and stood in the brightly lit entryway.

For some reason or another, I found myself wandering into the kitchen. It was bright there, and the air was cool. I seated myself at a counter and simply sat, trying to figure out what to do next. I assumed that I would find out soon, since that was the way things usually worked. Indeed, in just a few minutes, there was a great commotion in the hall. I poked my head out and saw several of Kaiba's suited men headed for the door, all of their radios turned on and blaring static.

"What's going on?" I asked the first one I was able to accost.

"Mrs. Kaiba," he addressed me with a little nod of his head. Surprised, my eyes widened—I wasn't used to being addressed so. Shaking my head, I let him continue. "Mr. Kaiba has radioed us and informed us that he will be landing at Kaiba Corp. in about half an hour."

"Oh," I said simply, and nodded. "You'd best be going then. Wouldn't want to have him mad at you," I said, smiling slightly.

The man looked surprised, and gazed at me curiously. "No indeed," he said, turning and walking away.

After the house had emptied and was lacking any other activity, I settled down to wait. For Mokuba I made sure there was ice cream in the freezer; for Kaiba (and probably for myself too) I started a pot of coffee. _I really need to stop drinking the stuff so casually_, I thought as the rich scent filled the kitchen. As I sat at the counter, waiting patiently, I began to feel a slightly ominous niggling at the back of my mind. Sighing, I closed my eyes and began to search my mind for the source.

At first I thought it was Kaiba, perhaps, who had stumbled into a connection with my mind. We'd never managed it before, although I had on accident, and we'd been apart for so long I soon realized it was close to impossible for it to be him. Then I thought it was perhaps Yami; Yugi and the others must have gotten back by now, and maybe he wanted to talk to me. We hadn't Channeled since he'd left for the Finals. I soon discovered that it wasn't Yami either. The presence in my mind was decidedly female.

Bemused, I prodded a little and produced a startled response.

_Oh!_ the presence said. I'm not quite sure how to define it—I couldn't yet see the other person in my mind, but I could definitely comprehend what she was trying to tell me.

_Hello_, I said cautiously, still prodding in the dark of my mind to try to make sense of who she was.

_Oh, I'm sorry, I've called the darkness. I wasn't sure if this was the right mind, so I thought… well, never mind what I thought. Here, I'll lift my spell now._ Light flooded my mind, nearly blinding me, and I blinked to clear my vision. If I'd been any shorter, my jaw would've hit the floor as it dropped when I saw who it was.

_You're…_ I stammered, blinking to make sure I wasn't going completely insane.

_Yes… It's a long story_, the Dark Magician Girl said.

_You can start by telling me how you're in my head…_

_I'm real, if that's what you're wondering._

_That's a relief—I was beginning to think I was losing it._

_There's something like a parallel dimension… where all Duel Monsters exist._

_Forgive me for being both shocked and disbelieving._

_Not at all. I'm surprised you haven't dismissed me from your mind completely. It's possible, you know. All you'd have to do is convince yourself that I'm not real. Most people would do it._

_I'm not in the habit of chasing people out of my mind. Most people can't break through the barriers unless they _need_ to be in my mind._

_Ah, I see._

_I also… I thought you might be important. You've been appearing in my mind, recently. My memories and such._

_And I thought _you _might be important. You've been appearing with the Pharaoh and the Priest quite a bit._

_I'm… good friends with the Pharaoh, and I'm married to the Priest. I'm expecting both of them home soon._

_Oh, that's excellent. I'm going to need to speak with both of them. And that's what I need you for._

_You do realize that Kaiba darling is not going to believe either of us, right? Yami and Yugi most certainly will, but Kaiba's an entirely different story._

_Don't worry. Kaiba, as you call him, will come around in time._

I snorted mentally. _If you insist. So what do you need me for? Can't you just enter their minds like you've entered mine?_

_I could. But that wouldn't be much fun, now would it?_

_I imagine there's more to it than that. One can live without a bit of fun, if it's necessary._

_It's vitally necessary that I speak with the Pharaoh. But trust me when I say I need you as a third party._

_All right, I trust you. You're not going to get me killed, are you?_

_Of course not._

_Good. So tell me… why do you need to speak to the Pharaoh so badly? And the Priest too?_

_And the Pharaoh's friend… the blond one._

_Joey?_

_Yes, he's rather amusing. I like him—reckless, daring, a bit on the stupid side sometimes…_

I fought the urge to burst out laughing—both mentally and physically. _Sorry dear, he's already taken. Or half-taken, at least._

The Dark Magician Girl laughed, a light, tinkling laugh in my mind. _So I've seen. That's quite all right. In any case, they're the only ones who can save my kingdom._

_Your kingdom? Save? And you're laughing to me about how cute Joey is?_

She shrugged. _Things are more palatable when they are accompanied by humor._

_Don't try that strategy with any of the three. They take things very seriously._

She nodded knowingly. _Thank you. Yes… they are the three warriors who will awaken the great dragons._

_You mean… like Duel Monsters dragons?_

_Yes, but not the ones you're thinking of. Kaiba may be fond of his Blue Eyes, and Joey of his Red Eyes, but these dragons that they are to awaken are far more powerful than any dragon in human decks._

_I see. And what are they supposed to do once they wake the dragons?_

_They must join with the dragons to fight my land's greatest enemy—an enemy more powerful than even the darkness that threatened your world just a few days ago. This enemy has the power to destroy my world completely, and throw yours into chaos._

_Please explain… I don't know very much, you see._

_A great force threatens both of our worlds… The great beast called Leviathan. It was sealed away, many years ago, by the Dragons. The beast lay dormant in its prison for centuries, but now there is one who is trying to awaken it again. It has begun to fuel the beast by stealing the souls of monsters and humans—_

_How does it steal one's soul?_

_In my world, it opens a great vortex into which monsters are drawn, never to be seen again. If this continues much longer, my kingdom will be utterly destroyed. In your world, men imbued with the power of the Orichalcos stone raise the Seal during a duel. If you lose the duel, the Seal takes away your soul._

I felt the blood drain away from my face and hands, and I shivered involuntarily. I remembered the cold, frightening touch of the Seal's magic against my mind… So that was the true power of the Seal. That was why I needed to learn to break it—to stop souls from being sucked away by its ancient master and used to revive a power capable of destroying more than one world.

_I see…_

_You've had contact with the Seal. I can sense your fear—a fear that comes only from having known what the Seal is capable of._

_Yes. I was told that I must learn how to break the Seal with my power._

_Then you _are _the one I have been seeking. _There was a pause as she seemed to think. _Then I must ask a favor of you. When the next journey begins… will you be there? Will you journey with them, and protect them? I know your power is not yet complete, but I would ask that you would do what you can to ensure that their souls are not taken. I trust their skill, but there are things yet unforeseen which can yet alter their course…_

_Yes. I will. I needed… to go with them anyway. For my own purposes. I am somehow connected to the Great Beast and the Dragons and the Seal, though I am not sure yet how… _

_Neither am I. I wish I could provide you with some answers, for that is what your mind says you seek. However, I know only that Leviathan threatens my land, and that you are necessary to protecting it. I will be back to speak with you soon… _ And with that she disappeared from my mind, leaving only her lingering magical presence behind.

With a sigh I opened my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. Why did things just seem to get more and more complicated? First the memories, now Duel Monsters popping into my consciousness and talking to me…

I was distracted from my self-pity by the sound of footsteps in the hallway. With my eyes still closed, I guessed that there were two people, and I even guessed who they were. I wondered what Kaiba had done with his black-suited entourage. They must have seen the lights in the kitchen, because within moments I heard Mokuba's energetic tread cross the doorway.

"There's ice cream in the freezer," I said quickly, pointing with one hand to the bowl I had already brought out. "And there's coffee in the pot," I gestured to the coffee pot. My eyes were still closed and my face still buried in one hand.

"Thanks!" Mokuba's excited voice called out, and despite my confusion and weariness I smiled. He began chattering about the tournament as he spooned out ice cream into the little glass dish.

"Mokuba," Kaiba gently chided. "That's enough."

"But Seto!" he protested. "I haven't had ice cream at home for weeks!" I'd thought Kaiba had been asking Mokuba to stop talking, not to stop gorging himself on ice cream. The slight pause before Kaiba's response told me he'd thought the same.

"You had ice cream three nights ago at dinner."

"I said _at home_!"

A heavy sigh followed Mokuba's flawless logic, and I knew Kaiba was going to relent. "All right, but eat your ice cream in _relative silence_, please. And then go upstairs and get some rest. You haven't been sleeping properly since this whole thing started."

"Neither have you," Mokuba retorted beneath his breath, but he sat quietly across from me and ate his ice cream. Kaiba had poured himself a cup of coffee and settled himself beside me. I lowered my hands and raised my head to look at the brothers.

"So what did you do while we were gone?" Mokuba asked, turning the spoon around and licking it clean.

"Nothing much," I lied. "I sat around, mostly. Walked in the park. Nothing major. It's not like I emptied your brother's study of valuables or remodeled our bathroom."

Mokuba nodded. "Sounds boring," he said bluntly.

"It was," I replied, taking a sip of my coffee.

"You developed a taste for coffee," Kaiba added appreciatively as he stood to pour himself another cup.

"Yes. You had enough of it in the house. I figured I might as well appreciate some of it." I thought I saw a smile twitching at the edge of his mouth.

"All right," Mokuba announced as he finished off his ice cream. "I'm going to bed, Seto. Good-night!"

"Good night," Kaiba replied, ruffling Mokuba's already unruly hair as he skipped out of the kitchen. I smiled at the back of his head as he turned back towards me.

"So…" he murmured, staring down into his coffee.

"How are the others?" I asked, wondering what kind of answer I'd receive.

"Just fine," he snorted. "Did you expect them to keel over or something? I didn't do anything to them, if you were wondering."

"No, I wasn't. I'd heard that things were… not going according to plan, necessarily. You and Mokuba are clearly all right, and I wanted to make sure nothing happened to the others."

He sighed. "No, things didn't go according to plan. But everyone seems fine." He looked tired; there were dark circles under his eyes that hadn't been there before, and a defeated slump in his shoulders that belied all of his cockiness and self-assurance.

I reached my arm around and gently massaged his shoulders—I found the knots that had been growing there for weeks. I think I may have been the only person to notice that Kaiba was human in those weeks of the tournament. In that moment, as I began to massage away a particularly hard and large knot in his right shoulder, I saw the tired, overworked, and utterly defeated man no one else was allowed to see. I probably wasn't even supposed to know, but he let his defenses slip and was too tired to raise them again.

"You should get some rest," I murmured, genuine concern in my voice. "Mokuba was right."

He shook his head stubbornly. "I'd better make sure Kaiba Corp. is in order. Some of my… less beloved colleagues and relatives tried to take Kaiba Corp. from me while we were gone, and I want to make sure nothing happened." He stood to go, and I grabbed his wrist.

"No," I ordered firmly, turning him and placing my palms against his shoulder blades. "You are going to get some well-needed rest," I continued, pushing him up the stairs towards the bedroom. "You are going to take a nice, warm, long bath to relax your muscles—look at this!" I demanded, prodding his tense shoulders. "Then you're going to let me figure out how to get rid of these knots. Then you're going to _go to sleep_ like a good little boy, and sleep in late tomorrow morning. You are not to get out of bed before ten in the morning—you should be glad I'm not making it eleven, judging by the circles under your eyes," I snapped as he turned to glare at me. "You are going to let me bring you breakfast in the morning, and you are going to spend the day relaxing. If I catch you even _thinking _about Kaiba Corp., I swear you'll regret it for at least a month. Got it?" I asked as we reached the bedroom door.

I knew there was something wrong when he didn't argue with me. He argued with _everyone_ when they tried to order him around. "Yes, mother," he said dryly, but his voice lacked the usual force and venom normally associated with his sarcasm. He pushed open the door and stepped inside.

Without any words on my part he went to his closet while I went to the bathroom to fill the bathtub. Without protest he stripped off his clothes and lowered himself into the hot water, then took a half-hour bath while I read in bed. When he came out, dressed in (oddly enough) comfortable looking flannel pajama pants and a t-shirt, he obediently lay facedown on the bed and rested his head on top of his arms. I am only slightly ashamed to admit that he looked so irresistible that if he hadn't looked so weary and almost sad, I would've pounced on him right then and there. Instead, I leaned over and began to massage the knotted muscles in his shoulders and back. When I was both exhausted and satisfied that I had gotten rid of the worst of the knots, I pulled down the covers and crawled into bed, waiting for him to join me. Moments later, he'd followed me and was wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I missed you," he whispered, barely audible. I wondered why he seemed to have such trouble saying it.

After a moment's hesitation, I answered simply. "I missed you too."

He pulled me against him and began to kiss my neck gently. "Would it be against your relaxation plan if I kept going?" he murmured, voice more confident, as he shifted his hips suggestively.

I smiled and turned into his embrace. "What do you think?" I purred, running my hands along his chest.

"I don't think it'd be a problem at all," he smirked, pulling himself on top of me.

* * *

I was woken by the other presence in my mind, the gentle prodding that ordered me to become conscious again. Groaning softly, I rolled away from Kaiba and looked over at the digital clock. 3:12, it blinked in bright green.

_3:12! In the morning!_ My mind exploded into wakefulness and indignation. Huffing, I grabbed my satin robe off the bedpost and stomped towards the balcony, where my mind guest was ordering me. Kaiba whimpered something incoherent as his hands sought my body. Sighing, I went back to the bed, smoothed his dark hair away from his forehead and kissed it gently. "Don't worry, I'll be right back," I soothed, drawing the sheets up to his shoulders. He snuggled down into the bed and was silent.

_What do you want?_ I demanded as soon as I was out on the balcony, gazing over the beautiful city lights. It was a beautiful sight, the thousands of flickering colors painted over the city, shining in a coordinated show just for fools like me who were up at this ungodly hour.

_Grouchy, aren't we? _she asked slyly. _I would be too, actually, if I had to leave a man as beautiful as yours._

I scowled and ignored the bait. _Just tell me what you need._

Her tone and posture became immediately more serious. _I need to speak to the Pharaoh and his other half._

_Now?_

_Now._

Sighing, I closed my eyes and sought the long-unused Channel with Yami.


	40. I'm Sorry

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Congratulations! You've survived my extremely long (and unintended) lack of posting! You've also again reached the end of what I have written! There is nothing stockpiled beyond this chapter, so only the gods know when I'll be posting again! Whee!

Check the bottom of my profile for a note about my writing (which has been suffering ever since the week of finals) and my LJ for updates on life (which is interfering terribly with fanfiction), replies to reviews, and the LONGEST ENTRY I'VE EVER WRITTEN on AX (Anime Expo! Wheeeeeee! -dances around in happy happy circles-)

Again, I apologize for the made up stuff in this chapter (of which there is quite a bit…) I saw my first Saturday episode of YGO since December this past Saturday and my jaw nearly hit the floor. I've missed so much! The only way I was able to sort of kind of pretend I knew what was going on was because of the replays on weekday afternoons…

Responded to reviews by **Raiyne Nagakura, xEternal Moonlight Phoenix Magex** (formerly **Gardevoir-Mages**—sorry to see that you guys split up!), **kalee-a-waterbender**, and **SilverFoxes-Black Wolves** on my LJ. Click on the link to my user info, then scroll down to the Memories link. Look for the chapter where you left the review to find the entry where I replied.

**Gardevoir-Mages** (Chapter 38): Sorry! It's not that bad... Ah, I see, the one with the computer rules all. That makes sense. I just like the Dark Magician Girl. Although her wand spits out HEARTS. I mean, at least stars and moons and suns and fun celestial things like that... -blushes- Okay, as long as you got something out of it... I'll try to update every 1.5 weeks. Promise. I reviewed your story!

Chapter 39: I'm Sorry

_Wait_. She reached out and put a restraining hand on my wrist.

_What?_ I asked, still highly irritated. _I thought you wanted to talk to Yami and Yugi._

_I do. But first… I need to fuse our minds._

_WHAT! _It was weird enough to even _have_ the Dark Magician Girl talking to me; it was even weirder to have her want to take over my mind. My mind wasn't its own as it was—I really didn't want her taking any more of it than had already been claimed.

_I need to speak to them through you._

_I don't understand…_

_I'll fuse our minds. Then you Channel, or whatever you call it, with the Pharaoh. He'll see me, not you, and I'll do all the talking, but you'll be there to see it._

_And you need me because…?_

_Just trust me. I think it's important that you see the Pharaoh awaken the first dragon. You are, after all, training to defeat the Great Beast._

_You're out of your mind. _Actually, she was, she was in my mind… I shook my head to stop that particular train of thought.

_No, I'm not. You're learning how to break the Seal of Orichalcos, right? That means you're learning how to prevent the Beast from taking souls. And if it is unable to gather enough souls—or the _right _souls—then it can't be revived and the threat is gone. Of course, I imagine it won't be nearly that simple, but I'd like to think it is._

I sighed. I'd do whatever she wanted at this point; I was too tired to argue any more. _Fine. Here. Do whatever you're going to do, then tell me so I can open the Channel._

She nodded, and pretty soon I felt a strange tingling in under my skin. _I'm done_, she announced, and I again sought the Channel.

The connection was quick—even the weeks we'd been apart hadn't in any way lessened our bond. I walked over to his still, sleeping form in the dark. As I walked, I noticed that I no longer had my body; instead, I'd become the Dark Magician Girl. _So this is what you meant,_ I remarked wryly.

_Yes._

The rest of the conversation was a blur. She explained to him as best she could the situation (doing a better job with him than she had with me; maybe it was the extra practice time she'd had) and then we floated down into a huge chamber. The room was beautiful, the arched dome overhead allowing a pale, very magical light to filter through and illuminate the statues in the center. The three dragons were frozen in what appeared to be ice, each with a sword thrust through some part of their body. The Dark Magician Girl gestured to the dragon with a sword through its eye, and ordered him to remove the sword. He and Yugi looked at each other, then reached together for the jeweled hilt.

_If they can pull it out, then all will be as I had hoped. _I said nothing in response. There didn't seem to be anything worth saying.

After a few tense moments of the sword not moving, the pair was able to draw the sword successfully (as I had suspected all along), and the ice shrouding it cracked and fell away, revealing a beautiful creature. Its strong body was covered in a green-blue skin, and it reared its head to release its battle cry. It swiveled its powerful head on its long neck in order, it seemed, to look at me—it fixated its deep blue eyes on me, boring tunnels to link it to my soul. My eyes widened in surprise.

_I knew this dragon._

As quickly as the realization came, the dragon had turned away from me and was responding to its new master. My mind whirred blindly as the Channeling wrapped up, leaving me and the Dark Magician Girl standing on the balcony of Kaiba's bedroom.

_Thank you. I'll return again when it is time for the other dragons to wake._

_Wait_, I cried, reaching out as if to stop her from leaving my mind. _Tell me—the dragons, where did they come from?_

She frowned, giant blue eyes narrowing a little and pretty little mouth turning down in a half-pout. _I don't know. All I know is that they appeared the first time the world needed to be protected from the Great Beast—_

_When was that? _I asked quickly, pulse rapidly gaining speed beneath my skin.

_I don't know, really. Thousands of years ago, I would guess. Perhaps… five thousand years?_

_Oh. I see. Well. Thank you…_

_Don't worry_, she reassured me. _The answers you seek will come in time._

I nodded mutely as she retreated from my mind, still lost in thought. Slowly, I turned, wrapping my thin robe around me tightly. Suddenly, the warm summer night was not as warm as it had seemed, and my robe provided hardly any warmth for my naked body beneath. I hurried back to the bed, crawling in and pressing myself against Kaiba's warmth, pulling the covers up to my chin.

----------------

The next morning I was awakened, not by Kaiba stirring early than I had ordered, but by another presence in my mind. I swore if it was the perky Dark Magician Girl, I'd punch her past Pluto. Thankfully, I didn't have to raise a fist; the presence turned out to be Yami.

_Good morning, _he greeted me pleasantly, seating himself beside me. I smiled and sat up to take in my surroundings. We were in one of the more comfortable rooms of Yami's mind; this one was well-lit, with a comfortable set of couches and a low table. Rubbing my bleary eyes, I lay back down again, resting my head in Yami's lap.

_What is it?_ I asked sleepily, as he began to gently stroke my hair.

_Nothing, really. I just wanted to make sure you were all right._

_Shouldn't _I _be the one checking on _you_? Did everything go all right? Was anyone hurt?_

_Well, some things got out of hand. The leader of the Rare Hunters, a man named Marik, was possessed by the dark spirit of his Millennium Item. He started turning the Duels into Shadow Games and sending souls into the Shadow Realm. _I noticed that he was irritated—no, flat out angry—as he said this. _It was completely out of control. Kaiba wouldn't do anything to stop him. Although I doubt even Kaiba could've done anything to prevent him from Dueling. _His eyes were troubled as they gazed back at me. _Mai and Joey were both sent._

I gasped, sitting up sharply. _Are they all right? _I asked fearfully, tears threatening to come to my eyes. I quickly brushed a hand across my eyes, wiping away tears yet unshed. _Oh gods… Please don't let anything have happened to those two…_ I thought to myself.

_They seem to be fine. I worry about Mai, a little… he caught her when she was so vulnerable. Joey tried to save her, you know. Just before the final attack… he tried to protect her… _He shook his head sadly. _Joey got a little reckless. He wanted to avenge Mai, make Marik bring her back. He should have left Marik to me._

_But then he would've had to face Kaiba—he would've lost anyway._

_But he wouldn't have almost lost his soul_, Yami pointed out, and I fell silent.

_Joey's fine. Really. He's very strong, and he knew that the rest of us were pulling for him._

I frowned. _I wish Kaiba had told me about this when I asked what happened._

_Kaiba keeps trying to deny it ever happened. He saw the whole thing, but he'd rather act as though there was no dark magic or evil spirit at work during his tournament._

_But Mai…_

_We can only hope she'll recover fully. I'm not worried about her physical body—that was just fine, Tea watched over her during the Duels. But I _am _worried about her spirit… I don't know what she saw while she was in the Shadow Realm, what evil visions he showed her, but I think… I think they broke her._

_No…_ I whispered, pain clutching my chest. _That can't… She wouldn't…_

_I know. We all thought she was stronger than that—we thought she knew how much she meant to Joey and the rest of us—but especially Joey!_

I mentally resolved to speak to Mai myself, to try to bring back the spunky, confident woman I'd known and loved. Sighing sadly, I lay back down, snuggling against Yami as if it were the most natural thing in the world. _Yami?_

_I'm sorry I could not protect Mai. I wish… I wish I had been strong enough to._

_Don't apologize. There was nothing you could do, I'm sure; otherwise you would have done something. I'm just glad you're safe._

------------------

"Can I get up now?" Kaiba asked groggily, burying his face in my bare shoulder and pulling me out of my comfortable Channel with Yami.

I wanted to confront him, demand to know why he hadn't told me that two of my best friends had been sent to the Shadow Realm, where their souls might have been lost forever, but decided against it. If Kaiba refused to acknowledge the presence and working of magic, then how could I explain how I knew? And how would I _ever_ explain what had happened the weekend our wedding was supposed to have taken place originally? And then—this one was a doozie—how would I explain what _I _was?

So instead, I rolled over playfully and ruffled his usually neat hair and smiled. "What time is it?"

"11:28," he mumbled into my shoulder.

"No, you can't get up. I thought I was bringing you breakfast in bed."

"How about I just have you instead?"

I gasped at his blatantly sexual statement, and pulled away in mock shock. "Seto Kaiba!" He smirked at me, both recklessly and lazily, watching me with those beautiful blue eyes.

"I thought it was a reasonable proposition."

"Then you don't know me very well."

"I would agree with that. That's why you should stay."

"I beg to differ. You stay in bed, while I make you breakfast. And don't you dare budge—unless it's to take a relaxing bath again." I hopped out of bed, pulled a nightdress on, and headed for the door. "And relaxing _does not_ require your briefcase!" I called back over my shoulder, and I heard him groan and flop back down on the bed.

Twenty minutes later I was back in the room, bearing a tray of traditional breakfast foods. A fruit salad, eggs, bacon, toast, and orange juice were arranged neatly and in a very aesthetically pleasing manner. I placed the tray on the bed beside Kaiba and sat down on his other side, perched delicately on the edge of the bed. His eyes widened appreciatively as he took in the large breakfast I'd prepared.

"You made all this?" he asked, a note of disbelief in his voice.

"No, I waved my magic wand and 'poof,' it all appeared on the tray."

His next action surprised me so much that I was unable to respond properly. He reached over and hugged me with one arm, pulling me against him. "Thank you. And I… I didn't… I didn't mean to offend you." He let me go quickly, but not as if he was uncomfortable, and turned back to his breakfast. He began eating silently while I gawked at the back of his head. Had _the_ Seto Kaiba just apologized to me? Granted, he never said, "I'm sorry," but wasn't what I'd just heard close enough?

Maybe… but maybe not. Maybe it _was_ his way of saying he was sorry, but maybe it was his way of avoiding having to say it—to avoid the embarrassment of actually lowering himself to that level. It would naturally be very difficult for someone as proud as he was to actually apologize to me. Yes, that must be it.

But I wondered, as I watched him slowly chew and swallow, if in his heart he really was saying, "I'm sorry."

----------------

The next day, I finally allowed Kaiba out of the house. He leapt at the chance to get to Kaiba Corp., but slowed his getting-ready pace when I gave him a look over my shoulder. He ate breakfast in a relatively leisurely fashion, sauntered out towards his limo, even ordered his driver to drive at 5 mph out of the driveway, and at the speed limit 45 mph outside the house. Once he was out of my sight, though, I assumed the driver would be going over 70 without a second thought.

Sighing, I sat down at the counter with a cup of coffee and contemplated what to do. Tea and Serenity had called the night before, asking if I wanted to go shopping with them. I decided to take them up on the offer, and lifted the phone to call them. I quickly made plans with Tea, then set about getting ready. As I changed into more comfortable clothes, I decided I would go pay Mai a visit before I met the other two. Maybe I could convince her to come along… I didn't know how bad she was; Yami and the others apparently hadn't seen her since their return to Domino.

I walked down the streets, stopping at the red lights, turning the appropriate corners. The sun shone brightly and prettily, promising not only a hot summer day, but also the much written about "brighter tomorrow." Even with the darkness of the past and confusion hanging over me, the bright golden light of the sun could almost convince me that tomorrow would be brighter than today.

As I turned the final corner before Mai's apartment building, a tall man walking briskly turned the corner too sharply. We collided soundly, me falling rather ungracefully backwards and he stumbling a bit to the side. Embarrassed and apologetic, I stood, brushing myself off, hastily voicing my sincerest apologies for my blunder. I knew that it hadn't been my fault, but I saw no reason not to be polite anyway. He dusted off his light bluish-white suit, and merely shook his head.

"No, it is _I_ who should be apologizing. I was not paying attention. I'm terribly sorry," he said, in a deep, rich accented voice.

Curious, and entranced by the beautiful voice, I tilted my head upwards a little to get a better look at the stranger. He was tall—very tall, as tall as Kaiba I suspected—with a refined air brought by wealth and power. Yet here he was, walking down the street like any normal person! His pale suit was impeccable, from the crisp pleats in his pants to the sharp tie at his neck. His hair was white, and was well-styled and kempt. It hung nearly to his feet, and was tied back in a low ponytail near the base of his neck. Most intriguing, though, were his eyes… as I gazed into their narrow, catlike depths, I noticed that one was a beautiful sea green-blue, while the other was a brilliant gold.

I flushed, realizing I must have been intruding into his personal space—in order to gaze into his catlike eyes, I'd leaned forward on my toes into his face. "I'm so sorry," I said, looking away quickly. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Positive," he said, gazing at me disinterestedly. But you can always tell—when someone intentionally looks at you disinterestedly, you know they're interested in you. "But thank you for asking." He checked his fine gold watch then, and said briskly in his smooth voice, "I should be going now. Again, my apologies for this little incident." He placed his hand on my shoulder, an appropriate gesture of apology. Then his hand gently drifted over, fingers gently gripping my chin and tilting it upwards so I looked into his eyes. They stroked my skin softly for a moment, then let me go with a barely perceptible push. He smiled knowingly at me, then walked away.

I stood on the sidewalk, catching the breath that I hadn't realized was gone. I was too shocked to even turn around to watch him go, although I suspected that, as in all good stories, if I'd turned I would've discovered he was gone already anyway. I stood dumbly for several more seconds as my hand inched upward to touch the skin he'd so gently—and yet so possessively—caressed. As the flesh of my fingers met the flesh of my face, an unwelcome memory exploded into my brain.

------------------

_It was the feeling of kissing… but not like when I kissed Yami or Kaiba. It wasn't gentle, passionate, loving. It was hungry, like they were when they kissed me, but it was hungry in a violent, possessive way. And my mouth was most certainly not responding to the kiss. As the memory became clearer, I could see vague outline of the man who was trying to own me, though I could see no details. And I could barely hear his voice…I understood what he said only because I watched his lips move as he pulled slightly away from me._

"_You're mine, now," he whispered, hands tightening around my waist and pulling me towards him._

"_Everything is mine." His voice held a note of wicked triumph, and I shuddered in his embrace. Weakly I tried to push him away, but his grip only tightened._

"_Where do you think you're going? You don't have anyone else to run to… not after you killed the High Priest and the Pharaoh. Or don't you remember?" he hissed silkily into my ear, drawing me even closer to him. I whimpered in protest._

"_I didn't…" I murmured, vaguely aware at some deep level of consciousness that I had not… "I loved them… I wouldn't have…"_

_He scowled darkly, then shoved me away with one hand and struck me across the face with the other. "Stubborn whore!" he yelled, lunging for me. I crumpled into a ball against the wall, with no place to run._

_Fuming, he towered over me as he reached for me. His strong hands grabbed my hair and yanked me up by it. The pain brought tears to the corners of my eyes, and I bit my lip to keep from giving him the satisfaction of me screaming. He jerked my head back, exposing my neck and breast._

"_I suppose it doesn't matter anyway. I only want you for this," he snarled, reaching for me. His hand slammed into my breast, and gold light flared in my vision before everything went dark._

--------------------

I hadn't even realized my eyes were closed until I opened them. The street was, thankfully and probably not coincidentally, deserted, and I was able to sit down on the concrete to catch my breath. I pushed the unpleasant memory to the back of my mind, though I knew that it would haunt my consciousness and ruin my day. I resolved to think of it and its implications later, with someone who would know what to tell me about it.

I walked the short distance to Mai's apartment, skipped up the flight of stairs, and rang the cheery doorbell. No answer. I rang again, and when there was no answer I proceeded to pound mercilessly on the door. "Mai!" I yelled. "Mai, open this door! Mai! I know you're in there…" I continue to call out and pound, not caring if I disturbed the neighbors. At last, after several minutes, I heard footsteps behind the door and the creak of a door hinge long unused.


	41. Losing Mai

AUTHOR'S NOTE: My profusest apologies for the delay. I just started writing again, so I'm about half done with the next chapter. I should be able to get at least that one out before I move into my dorm and start college. I'm a little lost on this fic, especially since I missed so many of the anime episodes, so I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with it. Sorry if I make any glaring plot errors; I apologize beforehand. The ending, if you didn't already know, is finished, so it's just the chapters in between that need writing and thinking and all that. You can read my profile for more notes on all the writing I've been doing recently.

Responded to reviews by **xEternal Moonlight Phoenix Magex**, **Raiyne Nagakura**, and **SilverFoxes-Black Wolves** on my LJ. I've changed the formatting of it, so hopefully it's accessible to everyone.

Chapter 40: Losing Mai

"And just what do you think you're doing?" a male voice demanded through the crack.

I was momentarily surprised by the strange voice, but instantly regained my composure. "I'm here to see Mai, let me through," I demanded, slamming my weight against the door.

"She doesn't want to see you," he snapped, trying to shove the door closed, pushing against my weight.

"I don't give a damn," I gritted out, leveraging my body against the doorframe to keep the door from closing. At last, with a tremendous heave, I managed to break through the doorway and into Mai's small entryway. I nearly fell over the young man standing there.

He was relatively short (not that I was unusually tall or anything), perhaps a head shorter than Joey. He carried himself with great confidence, but not the endearing confidence Joey exuded. I wondered what he was doing in Mai's apartment—and if Joey knew he was there.

"And just _what_ do you think you're doing in Mai's apartment?" I asked snippily, pushing him aside and striding into the hallway, headed for Mai's bedroom.

"I'm Mai's friend. She asked me to stay."

"And I'm Queen Elizabeth's cousin," I retorted sharply.

"I'm more of a friend than you are," he shot back.

I stopped dead in my tracks in the hallway, just outside of Mai's bedroom. "_Excuse me?_" I demanded, hands clenching into fists. I didn't know how to use my fists, of course, but I was angry enough to try.

"You heard me," he replied insolently.

"You don't know me," I hissed. "And you certainly don't know Mai. If you're the one who's convinced Mai to hole herself up in her apartment and never talk to the people that love and care about her, then you're not only a damn fool, but you're certainly not her friend."

"Oooo," he whimpered in mock fright. "You scare me so."

"I'm not trying to scare you. I'm just trying to get my friend back."

"If you're such a good friend, where were you during the Duel Monsters Tournament, eh? When she got shipped off to the Shadow Realm? You and your friendship weren't much good to her there."

I ground my teeth and spat out, "I did what I could. There were reasons I couldn't be there on the blimp during the Finals… and reasons that Yami couldn't save her using the Millennium Puzzle. That doesn't mean we weren't as worried as hell about her. And don't you go using that logic on her."

As I spun my back to him and turned the doorknob of Mai's room, I heard him chuckle and whisper, "Too late." Choosing to ignore him, I stepped inside the darkened room.

"Mai?" I asked, my tone almost demanding.

"Nnnn?" she muttered from her bed, where she was buried underneath a pile of blankets. I stalked over, ripped the comforter away, and stood over her in what I hoped was a menacing fashion.

"Get out of bed, NOW," I ordered, grabbing a wrist and yanking.

She offered little resistance and allowed me to drag her up. As she sat up, rubbing her eyes, I thought it would be easier than I first imagined to bring back the Mai I remembered. Of course, I'd forgotten about that annoying twit in the hallway…

"Mai," he said, and she was instantly more alert. Her purple eyes focused, and she half-turned toward him. He smiled winningly at her, and her features softened dreamily. Needless to say, I was disgusted. I'd once seen her like that, defenses down and heart open, only she'd been gazing longingly at Joey. Who the hell was this creep to move in and interfere with what had been there!

"Valon?" Mai asked, seemingly dazed. Her voice was weak and softer than I'd ever heard it, and there was a note of confusion there as well.

"I'm here Mai," the young man—Valon—replied. Smirking dangerously, he stepped past me and settled on the bed beside Mai, taking her hands in his.

"Wait," Mai said suddenly, shaking her head, trying to clear her thoughts and sort through what was going on. "What are you doing here?" she asked me, not angrily or suspiciously, but curiously, like a pleasant visitor she hadn't been expecting had arrived. I returned Valon's smirk with one of my own (learned, of course, from Kaiba) as his eyes narrowed and he glared at me.

"I'm here to visit you," I said smoothly, sitting down on her other side. She turned away from Valon and looked at me, eyes locked with mine, her attention devoted entirely to me. "I talked to Yugi, and he said things had gone badly for you. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Oh, I'm fine," she said, a little too quickly. The expression on my face must have said I caught it, because she looked guiltily away from me.

"You can tell me, Mai. I know… Or at least, I can try to understand what it was like for you."

"Valon, leave," she said quietly, voice low and eyes downcast.

"But…" he stuttered, reaching for her hands. She pulled them away and curled up into herself, and he was left grasping air.

"Please, leave," she whispered, voice trembling slightly. He looked over her hunched shoulders at me and glared, eyes telling me that he would not rest until he'd taken his revenge on me. Fine. I could deal with that. As long as he left my friend alone, he could throw everything he had at me. He stood up brusquely and stalked out of the door, shutting it loudly behind him.

"Do you think…" Mai whispered, "that it was supposed to be like that?"

"What?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"Everyone kept talking about Destiny. Yugi and Marik and Odion and Ishizu. As if it was tangible, real, like it governed our lives like gravity governs the path of a falling object. Do you think…" she trailed off, suddenly unable to finish.

"Do I think you were supposed to go the Shadow Realm?" I asked as gently as possible, resting a hand gently on her shoulder. "No, Mai, I don't. You didn't deserve it," I said quietly, smoothing her tangled blond hair.

"But… Surely… if Destiny is what they say it is…"

"It's not, Mai. I can't believe that Destiny would do that to you. I _won't_ believe that Destiny would do that to you."

"Then do you think… I was supposed to stay there forever?"

"What did I tell you? You weren't supposed to go there at all. It was just a fluke, a mistake. Think nothing of it. Or rather… Oh, Mai," I cried helplessly. "I know you'll never forget what happened to you there, but you can't let it control you for the rest of your life. Whatever you saw there had to be terrible, but it can be no worse than letting your true life be overrun by an illusion."

"What do you mean?" she asked weakly, leaning against me for support.

"You have a _life_ in this world, Mai. Forget about the other world, because it's not real. There's no way what you saw was real. It didn't accurately reflect reality, only what someone else wanted you to see. What _did_ you see, that scares you so?"

"I was alone," she whispered, so softly I could barely hear her. "All alone. Everyone left me… they all left me…"

"We would never do that," I whispered fiercely, hugging her to me. "Forget about it. All of it. You know we would never forget you. You will never be alone, Mai. Not as long as we're around."

"Are you sure?" she asked quietly.

"Positive."

"I've been sending them away… I told Valon not to let any of you in… I didn't think you'd want to come…"

"Even Joey?" I asked, looking her straight in the eye.

I don't know exactly what it was or why it happened, but something in Mai snapped at the mention of the boy who loved her. Maybe neither of them would ever admit their feelings outside of our private events, but everyone knew what was between them. They had to know, most of all, what lay in their hearts. But now his name brought tears to her eyes and drained the color from her face.

"Joey…" she whispered, eyes losing their focus and gazing out the window at the sky beyond.

_Oh shit_, I thought to myself. _What have I done?_

"He left me," she said quietly. "Even he left me… he said he loved me…" _Whoa, wait a minute! He told her that? What the…_

"No," she corrected herself, eyes hardening. "No, he never said that. I just assumed. And I guess I assumed wrong."

"What are you talking about, Mai? Maybe Joey's never said it, but neither have you! When it's not just the small group of us, you bite and claw at each other like two cats fighting over a mouse! Is that all that's bothering you? You have to know, Mai, that he loves you… can't you see it in his eyes?"

"That's not it," she said quietly. "If he really loved me, he would've said something."

"And if you really loved him," I retorted, "you'd say something too. You know Joey's not the brightest lightbulb in the pack!"

"He left me!" her voice was suddenly raised nearly to a scream now, and I thought that any moment she'd start shrieking at me. "Even he—the one I liked most—left me!"

"Of course, you idiot!" I was growing frustrated and angry, which caused me to yell unintentionally. "How many times do I have to tell you? Joey didn't really leave you, and he never would! All of that was just an illusion!"

"How do you know?" she challenged angrily. "What makes you so certain that he cares about me?"

"I just know!" I screamed, irrationally. "I know Joey, Mai, and deep in your heart you know it too. You're just scared," I snapped. "Scared that somehow you aren't good enough to keep him, and that's why you worry about him leaving."

A deafening moment of silence fell. _Shit_, I swore to myself. _Did you have to hit that close to home?_

Mai's vibrant purple eyes snapped to life, and she stood to her full height to tower over me. "That second-rate punk should be the one begging _me_ to stay," she snapped, and there was something in her voice that scared me… some new venom that she had never before possessed now coursed through her veins, and I sensed that every word that passed between us now would be more debilitating than the bite of a cobra.

"Excuse me?" I said slowly, trying to tread carefully but too angry to see the cracks in the sidewalk of our conversation. "If that's the way you're thinking, then maybe Joey doesn't need you. He needs somebody who understands and accepts him, not someone who cares more about his dueling record than his heart!"

There was a heavy, momentary silence as Mai fumed silently. "Valon!" she snapped. He immediately came, standing in the doorway.

"Yes, Mai?" he asked in his cocky drawl, looking sideways at me with triumph in his eyes.

"Escort her out. Now," she ordered, refusing to look at me.

"Be glad to," he said, with a little bow and a smirk.

"Oh, give me a break, Mai. You can't be telling me that you'd rather have _him_ than Joey," I snapped, ignoring Valon, who was approaching me quickly and reaching out to drag me away.

"He's a better friend than any of you can ever be!" she shrieked, tears coming to her eyes. She buried her face in her hands, hiding her amethyst eyes from me.

I stepped back, shocked by her outburst. Even Valon seemed surprised, because he froze in place as well. I listened for a few moments to Mai's sobs, then spoke quietly and—I hoped—carefully. "Mai… tell me why he's been better to you than any of the rest of us, and I'll leave. If you _really_ believe that, Mai, then I have nothing more to say."

"He… He _knows_ what it's like to be me. He knows what it's like to be on the outside looking in! You all are always there for each other, no matter what… I've never had friends like that. I've never had friends. Not real ones, at least. He knows what it's like to be alone, and weak. None of you have ever known weakness, have you? Look at Yugi, the best duelist in the world. And Kaiba, that jerk. Even Joey—he's never been anything but confident in his own limited abilities. And you and Tea and Tristan and Duke, the cheerleaders—all you've ever done is be supportive of them, never doubting them. How can any of you understand what it is to not know that… to fear losing, to fear defeat, to fear your own inability?"

I was silent for a moment. Then I asked, "How can we even begin to try, Mai, if you refuse to let us into your life?"

Without waiting for a response, I turned away from her and walked away, out her door and down her hallway. I turned the doorknob and walked out into the hallway and out of the building. I walked away in the bright sunshine, never once turning to look back at Mai's apartment building.

I'd done everything I could to bring her back. The final decision was hers to make.

----------------

I said nothing to anyone about my trip to Mai's. Kaiba didn't ask what I'd done during the day when he returned from work, and even if he had I would have lied. Yami didn't attempt to Channel with me, so I didn't need to tell him. And I couldn't bear to tell Joey or Serenity, who'd loved her so. I kept replaying the conversation in my mind, wondering where I'd gone wrong. I could never quite place the moment I lost her, the moment that she'd made the fateful decision that we could never love her.

The silence during dinner was not unusual, although Mokuba seemed to notice. I usually spoke to him throughout the meal, asking how school had been (if it were during the school year) or what he'd done with his friends (now that it was summer). Sometimes we'd talk about other things, movies or music or games. But tonight I was in no mood for small talk, and so I sat quietly and stared at my plate. I excused myself early and went up to the bedroom, where I flopped down on the bed and buried my head in the pillows.

What if Mai didn't chose as I hoped she would? How would I explain it to the others? What hope was there of getting her back? If we lost Mai… I cursed my own stupidity, my own reckless foolishness. Guilt weighed heavily on my heart as I lay there.

_It's not your fault_, a light, lilting voice said gently, and I groaned.

_Please don't tell me that_, I pleaded, squeezing my eyes shut to avoid crying.

_It's not_, the Dark Magician Girl asserted again. _You couldn't help it… You did everything you could…_

_It doesn't help. It doesn't change the fact that I feel like I lost her. _I _did. All by myself._

_No. She was already lost. You threw out a safety line into the middle of a raging river; it was up to her to grab it before she went over the waterfall._

_But… I pushed her away… I was so close…_

_It doesn't matter. You could not have won her back._

_How do you know? _I asked miserably.

_Just trust me. It was not meant to be._

_What wasn't meant to be?_

_She is meant… to be on their side._

_I don't believe that._

_I thought you believed in Destiny._

_Only in my own. They are all free to chose._

_If they are free to chose, why are you not? If the Pharaoh and the Priest can make their own decisions in this life, why can you not? Shouldn't it follow logically that they could_ chose_ to make different decisions than they did before? And wouldn't that mean that you are not needed?_

_No… I…_

_You're all bound by Destiny. It exists, doesn't it? But it is not all-powerful, is it?_

_No… No, I suppose it isn't. But then… why isn't it? Why didn't Mai have a choice?_

_I think… that is something you are destined to discover during this life. How many times have you failed to understand? There is more to breaking the cycle than simply discovering how… you must understand _why_ in order to truly win._

_How do you know all this?_

_I met some very interesting people today. They said they were your guardians, and told me a bit. They were quite helpful. And then… _she shrugged. _I remembered some things as well. Please, don't worry about Mai. In the end, all will be well. Just worry about what you can change, rather than the things you cannot._

And with that she exited my mind, leaving me more confused than before.

------------------

That night, as I lay beside Kaiba, I was drawn out of my dreamless sleep by a vision so vivid, I knew what I was viewing was reality and not merely a memory. I looked around briefly and saw the Dark Magician Girl to my left.

_Come_, she said quietly, beckoning me over. _I thought it was something you should see._

We were standing on a catwalk overlooking a huge hall. It was dimly lit, darkness broken only by the pale spots of candlelight. In what I assumed was the center of the room was a large number of candles, laid out into an intricate pattern. I could hardly see anything through the gloom, and could not discern the size, shape, or decoration of the hall. All I could see were the two figures framed by the doorway. Their footsteps echoed eerily through the room as they moved slowly forward.

"So, have you decided?" a smooth voice asked from the darkness. I started visibly; the Dark Magician Girl looked over at me, eyes questioning and trying to read me. That voice… belonged to…

"Yes," Mai answered firmly, body straight and tall and eyes defiant. I wondered if she was trembling inside… if somewhere deep inside her she was afraid of what she was doing. Her fists were clenched slightly at her sides, but her voiced refused to admit fear or anxiety.

"And what would your decision be?" he asked, and I heard his the soft tapping of his shoes against the hard floor.

Mai paused only momentarily, then swallowed and announced in a clear, even voice, "I'll join you."

He laughed his sweet, silky laugh and clapped appreciatively. He stepped out into the center of the room, the candles at his feet lighting his face. He smiled at Mai, and beckoned her forward.

"You have done well, Valon," he murmured, and Valon nodded. The easy, flippant smirk was gone from his face, and I knew then that Valon must have feared the man before him.

"Now, my dear, let me explain to you what you are going to do…"

"Wait," Mai interrupted. She wasn't one to be scared very easily, and I saw that her decision had emboldened her. Perhaps this was why she had decided… she hoped that this choice, this path, would give her the courage to move on, would somehow erase what had just happened. "You promise whatever happens to me, I will grow stronger?"

"Of course," he replied easily. "That was part of the bargain. The power that I am about to bestow upon you will greatly increase the strength of your Dueling deck—as well as your mental and emotional strength." I caught the implication as he smiled his half-smile at Mai, mismatched eyes regarding her carefully.

"Strong enough…"

"Yes—strong enough to beat Joey Wheeler. And possibly his friend Yugi, if you wanted it."

Mai's mouth and eyes were set, and she nodded. "All right. But your end of the deal had better hold."

"I've never gone back on a promise," he assured her. "Now, are you ready?" Mai nodded, and stepped away from Valon.

"Follow me."


End file.
